Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: tyrannosaurus vex on June 20, 2013, 07:42:09 AM

Title: the science and motivation behind brushing your teeth.
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on June 20, 2013, 07:42:09 AM
It is often said that the wise are silent. Listeners. That they weigh the evidence before them, before calmly -- and collectively -- reach a level-headed decision. They don't jump to conclusions. They don't put their feet in their mouths. They toe the line. They always keep one eye on themselves and one eye on the world around them, so they know when and how to act.

It was this wisdom, we are told, that built the Pyramids and the Eiffel Tower. It was wise men and women -- well, mostly wise men -- who knew what to do when the Plague struck down a third of Europe. These men who knew how to respond and what to expect when the Twin Towers fell. Wise people. Brave people. Loud, wise, silent people.

So, of course, we are told to be wise as well. To achieve Great Things, and appreciate Small Things. To listen. To be silent. We are encourage to achieve wonders by being meek. Because all the great people in history started out "small," too.

"The greatest instructor is the greatest student," We are told. "Approach knowledge with no preconditions, soak in the learning like a sponge! We promised the classroom is clean, and you're safe in here just as long as you remember where the fire exits are and what your hall monitor job is in the event of an active shooter."

This is all bullshit, and therefore, we endorse it completely. I mean, shit. You gotta "believe" something, right? Might as well be this! Fuck it! What do we care? It gives you an ethos, keeps you from wandering around the planet stabbing and shooting things (well, hold on. Unless they deserve it. Then it's OK.) You get to completely ignore the whole "what the fuck is actually happening around me" thing, and everybody else does so fuck, why not you too? Right? So yeah. If you want to believe that what the fuck do we care. You go right ahead and do that until you turn blue in the soul.

ANYWAY...

Here's the problem.

That story up there? Yeah, it's bullshit, I know we told you already but listen, you half-spilled bag of turds, that story was concocted and propagated by exactly the same assholes who are now teaching you to accept what you've been given in life because of all those people who have it worse. And while your entire lifetime earning potential is being quite literally GAMBLED AWAY on Wall Street as if you were last Tuesday's minor league softball match, you're getting a ph.D in the god damn history of the cracks in Mona Lisa's paint.

And they're not exactly hiding these days. They are in front of you all the fucking time reminding you who you are and what you believe, what you're worth and who you owe. Every day you live is a day you make them money, and on the day you die you'll make them money too. AND THEY WON'T EVEN NOTICE YOU.

Nobody's asking you to save the world and we're certainly not asking you to be uninformed. All we're asking is for you to

WAKE
THE FUCK
UP
Title: Re: the science and motivation behind brushing your teeth.
Post by: The Johnny on June 20, 2013, 08:18:14 AM

trying to hypnotize us by posting the same thing three times under different titles? lolwtf
Title: Re: the science and motivation behind brushing your teeth.
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on June 20, 2013, 08:23:19 AM
Quote from: The Johnny on June 20, 2013, 08:18:14 AM

trying to hypnotize us by posting the same thing three times under different titles? lolwtf

Look for context clues.
Title: Re: the science and motivation behind brushing your teeth.
Post by: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on June 22, 2013, 10:04:18 PM
What do Abe Lincoln and Jesus have in common? They worked for the MachineTM whether they knew it or not. And you can be just as famous, just as loved and hated, just as exalted as they were. If you play your cards right. Cards are limited and doled out sparingly. Line forms at the rear. No pushing. Wait patiently. Be quiet. Watch closely, you may pick up tips. Eyes on the cards only. It's the only game in town, the only one that pays. If you make it to the table, you want to be ready, right?

Take a seat between Abe and Jesus and wait for the deck to be cut. This could be your lucky day. It's your lucky day already, just for making this far. You've done so well. You worked so hard, watching and biting your tongue and giving up other things like GOING OUTSIDE and art and hobbies and soul.

Here's a toaster. Now will it be call, raise, fold, or death?

All that noise? Just haters. Fucking ranting about whales again. Fucking worthless whales. What have they ever done for anyone? Eyes on the cards, son. It's your play. Wall Street raises. Where's the deed for your property? Throw it in, kid. Go big or go home.

Just kidding. It's our home now. Next hand, girlie. You in or are you out? Winners go out one door, losers go out another. Which door do you want? That's right. Ante up.

There's nothing else in all the world but this. The world is a myth. This is real.

Ignore that grinding noise.
Title: Re: the science and motivation behind brushing your teeth.
Post by: Bruno on June 23, 2013, 01:34:53 AM
I'll just leave this here, then.

http://www.podcasters.fr/episodes/romains-13-romans-13-12565141.html

Quote


Fo Da Rome Peopo 13

Hawai'i Pidgin (HWP)
Gotta Listen Da Guys In Charge A Da Law

13 Everybody gotta listen da guys dat stay in charge a da law. Dey get da power fo tell da odda peopo wat fo do, you know. But da power dey get, God wen give um dat. Da guys dat stay get power right now, dey da ones dat stay in charge cuz God wen make um lidat. 2 Dat mean, if get somebody dat go agains da kine peopo dat get dat kine power, az jalike dey going agains da way how God wen go make one govermen fo us. If get anybody dat make lidat, dey goin get it from God da Judge.

3 If you do da right tings how suppose to, no need be scared a da guys dat stay in charge a da law. But den, if you do da bad kine stuff dass no good, you bes be scared! So, if you no like stay scared a da peopo dat get power, make shua you go do ony da good kine stuff. Den wen you do da good kine stuff, az wen dey goin tell you dat you stay okay. 4 Cuz da guys dat stay in charge a da law, dey da ones dat God wen pick fo help you. But, if you stay doing da bad kine stuff, eh, you bes be scared! Dey da ones dat get da right fo make shua you get it, an dey going do dat fo real kine, you know. Dose guys, az jalike dey da helpa guys fo God, fo punish da peopo dat doing da bad kine stuff. Cuz da bad kine stuff dat peopo do, God no goin take um.

5 Dass why you guys gotta listen to da govermen guys. Not ony cuz you know inside yoa heart, az how suppose to be, but cuz you know awready, God no goin take notting from you if you no do da right ting.

6 Same ting, dass how come you guys gotta pay tax too. Cuz da govermen guys, wen dey stay working hard fo do good job, dey stay working fo God. 7 So pay everybody wat you suppose to. Pay da tax guys all da diffren kine taxes dat you suppose to. Make shua you get respeck fo all da peopo dat suppose to get respeck. All da peopo dat stay doing good tings, go tell odda peopo dat dey doing good tings.


Title: Re: the science and motivation behind brushing your teeth.
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on June 23, 2013, 05:10:25 AM
Dat dog turd de peopo step in? God put it dere, you wipe shoe in de grass, you wipe God off...
Title: Re: the science and motivation behind brushing your teeth.
Post by: Bruno on June 23, 2013, 06:05:37 AM
And yet...

Quote

Luke 13

1Dat time some peopo stay dea, an tell Jesus bout da peopo from Galilee dat Pilateʼs army guys wen kill, same time dose peopo making sacrifice inside da temple. 2Jesus say, "You tink dem guys from Galilee wen do mo worse stuff den all da odda peopo from Galilee cuz dey wen suffa lidat? 3I telling you, no way! But if you guys no come sorry fo all da bad kine stuff you wen do, an pau do um, all you guys goin mahke too. 4Da eighteen guys dat wen mahke wen da tower near da Siloam water place wen fall down on top um -- you tink dey wen do mo worse stuff den all da odda peopo inside Jerusalem? 5I telling you, no way! But if you guys no come sorry fo all da bad kine stuff you wen do, an pau do um, all you guys goin mahke too."