And the rickets red glare!
It is time ladies and germtlemen!
It is time to take up arms!
We shall patriot loke they've never seen patrioting before!
We will drink Bud Light until it oozes out of our very pores.
We will indulge in the finest of franks!
And when they raise the red, white, and blue.
We shall bask in the unfettered glory of the Unmitigated States of Amorica!
Happy Fourth of July fuckers!
Hail Eris and the great country of Chaotic Discord! For no country has ever been such a Confusion of Bureaucracy, such a Chaotic Discord and such a melting pot of curry, bbq, pasta and shit!
I will set off ALL of the roman candles and purposefully ALL of the potato salads.
Because this is the land of the FREE!
I will take it TO THE WALL blasting Kenney Chesney and Lee Greenwood!
The Boston Esplanade will have more security restrictions than the TSA!
Because we're FREE!
We can't let just anyone enjoy the hot dogs and splosions. That would not be very patriotic.
If this were facebook this is the point when someone would chime in to say that they've heard of lots of other countries where they have less freedom than we have. Like Sierra Leone, where people get their hands cut off with machetes. (this was an actual argument someone made to me last 4th of July)
Because that's the bar for freedom we've set in this country: Not getting our hands cut off with machetes.
I sliced my thumb really good opening my Mountain Dew this morning.
THANKS A LOT OBAMA!
:argh!:
So much yelling to do tomorrow.
Idiots said "don't print out too many flyers, they'll get thrown away." THE WHOLE POINT IS TO EDUCATE THE PUBLIC YOU USELESS SHITNECKS, THAT'S WHY YOU'RE DOING THIS OMG I HATE YOU ALL.
Oh, and hot dogs, or something.
I'm going to be unpatriotic and work tomorrow.
Though, I'll be working from the beach. 8)
Happy Canada Day you guys. Don't eat too much turkey
Time and a half tomorrow!
That money ain't making itself.
FUCK YOU, RHODE ISLAND: I HAVE FIREWORKS FROM SOUTH CAROLINA AND FLORIDA I'VE BEEN SAVING SINCE JANUARY.
BECAUSE NOTHING SAYS 'LAND OF THE FREE AND HOME OF THE BRAVE' LIKE VERY LARGE AND OBNOXIOUS ROCKETS.
Quote from: Suu on July 04, 2013, 06:12:30 AM
BECAUSE NOTHING SAYS 'LAND OF THE FREE AND HOME OF THE BRAVE' LIKE VERY LARGE AND OBNOXIOUS ROCKETS.
Damn straight.
Because America.
Quote from: McGrupp on July 03, 2013, 03:04:11 PM
If this were facebook this is the point when someone would chime in to say that they've heard of lots of other countries where they have less freedom than we have. Like Sierra Leone, where people get their hands cut off with machetes. (this was an actual argument someone made to me last 4th of July)
Because that's the bar for freedom we've set in this country: Not getting our hands cut off with machetes.
:lol:
I've already had someone do that to me. They said America is the greatest country on earth because it's cheap to travel/fly across the country.
I think I'm going to take the kids down to the beach tonight to see if we can see the downtown fireworks from there.
Pretty much all the firework things have been canceled here because of storms. Which isn't stopping Georgians from setting off random fireworks and firing their guns into the air.
I always get a kick out of Massachusetts during the 4th and New Years.
Connecticut: Fireworks are legal.
Rhode Island: Fireworks are legal.
Vermont: Fireworks are legal.
Maine: Fireworks are legal.
Texas North New Hampshire: Driving drunk, and putting South Carolina and the southern states to shame are 100% pure legal, unregulated, and untaxed. Live free or die, motherfuckers.
Massachusetts: NO FIREWORKS. NONE. ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY? PEOPLE DIE! DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT DRIVING TO ANOTHER FUCKING STATE, NO, WE'RE GOING TO STOP YOU AND FINE YOU ALL KINDS OF FUCKING MONEY, BECAUSE WE'RE THE FUCKING PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF TAXACHUSETTS AND NO. DO NOT EVEN TRY TO SHOOT ANY OFF, WE WILL FIND YOU AND THROW YOU IN JAIL, BECAUSE NO. GO TO FUCKING BOSTON TO WATCH FIREWORKS, YOU LOSERS. DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT GOING TO PROVIDENCE, BECAUSE WE WILL STOP YOU AT THE BORDER, JUST IN CASE.
Actually, they're not legal in Maine either (aside from sparklers and the like) unless they've changed the law in the last few years.
Airborne fireworks are illegal here without a permit, but everyone just drives to Washington to buy reservation fireworks.
Honestly, fireworks are pretty much totally stupid. Let's shoot fire into the air in the summer so that it will land all over some dry flammable stuff! Oh shit, everything's on fire! Why did that happen?
Since I live in a special neighborhood the fireworks started last night until 4am and will continue on for about a week or whenever they run out.
I thought they were? I know airborne fireworks aren't permitted in CT and RI (loloops....) I know NH and VT are like, "WHAT LAWS?!" Sorry to hear that Maine is a shithead. At least not as shitty as Mass.
Quote from: Alty on July 04, 2013, 10:14:06 PM
Since I live in a special neighborhood the fireworks started last night until 4am and will continue on for about a week or whenever they run out.
We have people in my neighborhood that will drive to New Hampshire, risk getting pulled over in Massachusetts, just to bring the mortars back to RI. A lot of them will drive to South Carolina, because most of the Eastern Seaboard has a ban. We just happened to stop at South of the Border, twice, during the winter during our roadtrip, so naturally we had to stock up. Screamers attract attention though, so we need to be careful. Hopefully the cops will just be paying attention to the idiots with the mortars and not our rockets. We have some BIG MOFO rockets.
Tents selling fireworks pop up all over the place around here. Nothing too serious, *wink*, when the cops are around, but as soon as they go away, the big guns come out from under wraps and then cray-cray happens from Jul 3rd until Aug 3rd or until one two many people blow their faces off.
Quote from: My Other Username Is A Pseudonym on July 03, 2013, 01:17:11 PM
I will set off ALL of the roman candles and purposefully ALL of the potato salads.
Please videorecord and post to youtube.
....Because America.
SNAKES!
(http://i41.tinypic.com/23tdf4.jpg)
Quote from: Alty on July 04, 2013, 10:14:06 PM
Since I live in a special neighborhood the fireworks started last night until 4am and will continue on for about a week or whenever they run out.
Yeah. Portland is obsessed with fireworks, and they're ceaseless. It's kind of awful. They sort of gradually ramp up starting a couple weeks before the 4th and then gradually taper off again.
Then there are all the other holidays where for some reason there are fireworks. Why. Just why.
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 04, 2013, 10:26:14 PM
Quote from: Alty on July 04, 2013, 10:14:06 PM
Since I live in a special neighborhood the fireworks started last night until 4am and will continue on for about a week or whenever they run out.
Yeah. Portland is obsessed with fireworks, and they're ceaseless. It's kind of awful. They sort of gradually ramp up starting a couple weeks before the 4th and then gradually taper off again.
Then there are all the other holidays where for some reason there are fireworks. Why. Just why.
To fuck with my precious cats! :argh!:
Our neighborhood is full of tiny fireworks for a couple weeks around the 4th. We give them about two weeks before calling the cops about it, because we're NICE massholes.
Here, it is illegal to fire off any kind of firework, but not illegal to buy them.
I think you lot knew that, though, because we made the news with that gem. "GOVMINT CAN'T INFRINGE ON PEOPLE BUYING FIREWORKS! TAKE THAT, CONGRESS!"
Quote from: Alty on July 04, 2013, 10:28:41 PM
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 04, 2013, 10:26:14 PM
Quote from: Alty on July 04, 2013, 10:14:06 PM
Since I live in a special neighborhood the fireworks started last night until 4am and will continue on for about a week or whenever they run out.
Yeah. Portland is obsessed with fireworks, and they're ceaseless. It's kind of awful. They sort of gradually ramp up starting a couple weeks before the 4th and then gradually taper off again.
Then there are all the other holidays where for some reason there are fireworks. Why. Just why.
To fuck with my precious cats! :argh!:
On New Year's eve here, the prudent person stays indoors from 2345 to 015.
Somehow, people don't expect the laws of physics to affect bullets fired into the air.
Houstonians don't believe in physics, that's not God's plan.
Kittehs love valiums, btw. We had a cat get a UTI, the vet prescribed valium...Jeebus, that was a HAPPY cat for a few days...suddenly not able to jump very well and fell off the table a time or two, but happy kitteh.
Watching Independence Day...then we're pulling out the stash. :evil:
Suu
-Is a fucking pyro. Grew up in the South, fuck ya'll.
Quote from: Balls Wellington on July 04, 2013, 09:37:32 PM
Actually, they're not legal in Maine either (aside from sparklers and the like) unless they've changed the law in the last few years.
They did pass a law in the previous legislative session, they've been legal for over a year now, though some municipalities have banned them locally.
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/77207e43ae5b2ff9f5fa13efc9b147a2/tumblr_mpfd9uoobu1qzcv7no2_500.png)
Quote from: Mome Papess Trivial on July 05, 2013, 02:23:10 AM
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/77207e43ae5b2ff9f5fa13efc9b147a2/tumblr_mpfd9uoobu1qzcv7no2_500.png)
Noooooooo whyyyyy??? :horrormirth:
Quote from: Mome Papess Trivial on July 05, 2013, 02:23:10 AM
(http://25.media.tumblr.com/77207e43ae5b2ff9f5fa13efc9b147a2/tumblr_mpfd9uoobu1qzcv7no2_500.png)
:lulz: I can't believe it either!
Troll or are they just that derpy?
Oh, it's a meme.
Either way I laughed my ass off.
It's totally funny. Gives me an idea for a Twitter troll, too.
My wine is gone, my thumb is burned, and I smell like sulfur.
America!
It is really all about vodka and beef franks.
I want a beef frank. I accidentally the vodka, now beef.
Quote from: Suu on July 04, 2013, 10:14:40 PM
I thought they were? I know airborne fireworks aren't permitted in CT and RI (loloops....) I know NH and VT are like, "WHAT LAWS?!" Sorry to hear that Maine is a shithead. At least not as shitty as Mass.
Well yeah. But if they're not airborne then they're not really fireworks.
And I don't care what anyone else says or thinks, fireworks are fucking AMAZINGLY AWESOME. They are, in fact, the only really good thing about the 4th. Or possibly about the fact that America exists at all.
It's difficult, sometimes, for me not to reach back and unload a full-swing face slap on anyone who wishes me a "happy independence day!"
however, I find that "Oh, did you jackoffs decide to stop colonizing my country?" generally produces the desired effect.
Routinely around the first of July, I have to keep reminding myself what a gunshot actually sounds like, and that what I heard was a firecracker.
Quote from: Balls Wellington on July 05, 2013, 10:08:11 AM
Quote from: Suu on July 04, 2013, 10:14:40 PM
I thought they were? I know airborne fireworks aren't permitted in CT and RI (loloops....) I know NH and VT are like, "WHAT LAWS?!" Sorry to hear that Maine is a shithead. At least not as shitty as Mass.
Well yeah. But if they're not airborne then they're not really fireworks.
And I don't care what anyone else says or thinks, fireworks are fucking AMAZINGLY AWESOME. They are, in fact, the only really good thing about the 4th. Or possibly about the fact that America exists at all.
I think airbornes may be legal in RI now, because everyone and their fucking grandmothers had mortars last night. I've never SEEN so many mortars since I lived in FL. That, or everyone has been making the trips to NH to stock up.
I was very unpatriotic and did not watch any fireworks, at least not of the firey, sparkly variety.
Quote from: Balls Wellington on July 05, 2013, 10:08:11 AM
Quote from: Suu on July 04, 2013, 10:14:40 PM
I thought they were? I know airborne fireworks aren't permitted in CT and RI (loloops....) I know NH and VT are like, "WHAT LAWS?!" Sorry to hear that Maine is a shithead. At least not as shitty as Mass.
Well yeah. But if they're not airborne then they're not really fireworks.
And I don't care what anyone else says or thinks, fireworks are fucking AMAZINGLY AWESOME. They are, in fact, the only really good thing about the 4th. Or possibly about the fact that America exists at all.
Pretty sure they were invented by the Chinese, so we could have had them without America.
We went to the beach and made a fire and shot off fireworks and watched the downtown display. It was damn cool and I think we have a new 4th of July tradition.
Spent the night checking on one of my cats from time to time (the other slept through it all) and hoping that one of the idiots outside didn't set something on fire.
Oh and listening to my son complain about not being able to be outside with the smoke and stupidness.
Tucson managed to set the river on fire. :lulz:
What now? They're trying to be Cleveland?
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 05, 2013, 06:48:23 PM
What now? They're trying to be Cleveland?
Our rivers don't have water in them for 12 months of the year. They have dry vegetation. VERY dry vegetation. So when a starshell lands in them, things can get pretty interesting.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 05, 2013, 07:15:31 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 05, 2013, 06:48:23 PM
What now? They're trying to be Cleveland?
Our rivers don't have water in them for 12 months of the year. They have dry vegetation. VERY dry vegetation. So when a starshell lands in them, things can get pretty interesting.
Maybe the Mudstorm will help?
Quote from: Bebek Sincap Ratatosk on July 05, 2013, 10:50:03 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 05, 2013, 07:15:31 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on July 05, 2013, 06:48:23 PM
What now? They're trying to be Cleveland?
Our rivers don't have water in them for 12 months of the year. They have dry vegetation. VERY dry vegetation. So when a starshell lands in them, things can get pretty interesting.
Maybe the Mudstorm will help?
Yes, fire is no longer the issue. All the bike trails falling into the river are now the issue.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 05, 2013, 06:42:42 PM
Tucson managed to set the river on fire. :lulz:
Finally catching up with Providence, I see.
(http://www.williamkdaby.com/images/Rhode%20Island/ProvidenceNew%20and%20Old/Gondola%20ay%20Water%20Fire%20Prov.jpg)
Quote from: Suu on July 06, 2013, 12:24:52 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 05, 2013, 06:42:42 PM
Tucson managed to set the river on fire. :lulz:
Finally catching up with Providence, I see.
(http://www.williamkdaby.com/images/Rhode%20Island/ProvidenceNew%20and%20Old/Gondola%20ay%20Water%20Fire%20Prov.jpg)
POI DOESN'T COUNT.
And what's all that water doing in the river?
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 06, 2013, 12:59:54 AM
And what's all that water doing in the river?
Precautionary measure from very dry vegetation.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 06, 2013, 12:59:54 AM
And what's all that water doing in the river?
Those crazy bastards on the East Coast just leave water
lying around everywhere. It's the weirdest thing.
It's really a problem this time of year. We can't get RID of the stuff.
Quote from: M. Nigel Salt on July 05, 2013, 06:06:39 PM
Quote from: Balls Wellington on July 05, 2013, 10:08:11 AM
Quote from: Suu on July 04, 2013, 10:14:40 PM
I thought they were? I know airborne fireworks aren't permitted in CT and RI (loloops....) I know NH and VT are like, "WHAT LAWS?!" Sorry to hear that Maine is a shithead. At least not as shitty as Mass.
Well yeah. But if they're not airborne then they're not really fireworks.
And I don't care what anyone else says or thinks, fireworks are fucking AMAZINGLY AWESOME. They are, in fact, the only really good thing about the 4th. Or possibly about the fact that America exists at all.
Pretty sure they were invented by the Chinese, so we could have had them without America.
Oh, absolutely. But it took AMERICA to turn it into something that is both widely illegal AND incredibly and vehemently commercialized.
AMERICA: We don't blow your fingers off. We make blowing your fingers off better.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on July 09, 2013, 02:43:23 PM
AMERICA: We don't blow your fingers off. We make blowing your fingers off better.
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