Sit on Dirty Old Uncle Roger's lap and tell me what you're sorry for.
There's a golf course near my house, owned by the US Air Force. Right next to the poorest neighborhood in town.
I'm sorry I haven't got the guts to take a dump on it.
I'm going to an art opening tonight.
I don't know what I'm going to do afterwards yet, but I'm sorry in advance.
Accidental cayenne pepper up the nose. Immediate penance built in.
I farted in my cats face while I was asleep my wife saw everything.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 05, 2013, 01:24:58 AM
Accidental cayenne pepper up the nose. Immediate penance built in.
Up
there? :eek:
Quote from: Mean Mister Nigel on October 05, 2013, 03:15:46 AM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 05, 2013, 01:24:58 AM
Accidental cayenne pepper up the nose. Immediate penance built in.
Up there? :eek:
My rice was bland, so I added cayenne.
It was still bland, so I added more.
Then I coughed a little too hard for unrelated reasons.
Then it was in my nose and I was sneezing and burning all at the same time.
It was an interesting and unpleasant experience.
bought hookah coals and beer. went inside and realized I had forgotten the hookah coals, went back out to the car. twenty minutes later I go to the fridge and realize I had forgot the beer. fuck it all.
I'm sorry I on purpose that last bottle of wine.
Only if you can explain where your lap goes when you stand up.
Minus two points stealing jokes.
I'm sorry Seguin is still there. I had almost 11 years to find a way to improve it by turning it into a giant feral catbox, but I failed. :cry:
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 06, 2013, 06:20:05 AM
Minus two points stealing jokes.
If that was to me, well -
it's not
stealing, it's "repurposing".
Remember, humor, like any other energy, can't be created or destroyed, only transformed.
Quote from: Pere Ubu on October 06, 2013, 02:43:05 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 06, 2013, 06:20:05 AM
Minus two points stealing jokes.
If that was to me, well -
it's not stealing, it's "repurposing".
Remember, humor, like any other energy, can't be created or destroyed, only transformed.
It was directed to you.
Stop trying to transform then.
Also, humor isn't energy.
I'm sorry I haven't burned my corner of the yard.
I'm sorry for being so fucking not-hungover after three days of constant Saturday Night.
This shit just ain't right.
I'm sorry for failing to take any steps towards achieving my dream of moving to Mars.
I'm sorry for not producing those BMW sized parasitoid wasps I promised. Also, the flying shrimp colonies.
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 06, 2013, 02:59:12 PM
humor isn't energy.
It ISN'T?
Well.
Crap.
So much for my alternative power empire, then.
Anyone want 523 tons of feathers and a Joe Miller joke book?
Yes. Also, I'm sorry for not being sorry.
I'm sorry for ACCIDENTALLY ALL THE DRUG THREADS.
Quote from: Pere Ubu on October 06, 2013, 11:24:23 PM
Quote from: Doktor Blight on October 06, 2013, 02:59:12 PM
humor isn't energy.
It ISN'T?
Well.
Crap.
So much for my alternative power empire, then.
Anyone want 523 tons of feathers and a Joe Miller joke book?
:lulz:
I'm sorry it took me until about now to really uncover (emotionally as well as intellectually) the roots of my neurosis and resulting subclinical manic depression and that hence I paid my older kids significantly less attention than they would have deserved. (I'm glad that while I was somewhat neglectful, I was never controlling or coercive, and the damage appears to be minor and fixable.)
I'm sorry I posted a link about Miley Cyrus AND Marijuana, just to make RHWN's ears flap like Mothra barnstorming Osaka.
I'm sorry I didn't finish building that death ray.
I'm sorry I didn't throw up on Mike this year.
I'm sorry I didn't do the weasel dance when the CEO was in town.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 07, 2013, 07:50:34 PM
I'm sorry I posted a link about Miley Cyrus AND Marijuana, just to make RHWN's ears flap like Mothra barnstorming Osaka.
I'm sorry I didn't finish building that death ray.
I'm sorry I didn't throw up on Mike this year.
I'm sorry I didn't do the weasel dance when the CEO was in town.
You know, it's still not too late for #3!
Okay, for reals this time -
I'm sorry I'm not putting the Turkey Curse on rude spags at work.
I'm sorry I keep reading the god-awful self-published SCI-FI book someone gave me, just to remind myself how much better of a writer I could be if I just got, you know, writing.
I'm sorry I can't remember the title or author of the cool little paperback on Zen I bought in Utah back in 1987.
I'm REALLY sorry I understand SLACK and Zen and mindfulness and yet have such a goddamn hard time applying them in my life.
And I'm especially sorry I'm spending time trying to figure out how someone sits in his own lap.
Quote from: Pere Ubu on October 09, 2013, 01:46:50 PM
I'm sorry I'm not putting the Turkey Curse on rude spags at work.
And I'm especially sorry I'm spending time trying to figure out how someone sits in his own lap.
1. The Turkey Curse is fucking STUPID. You look like a rube, everyone laughs AT you, WITH the subject of your curse, and you are forever known as a useless dork. Better to get horrible revenge.
2. I can do lots of shit. I'm a Holy Man™.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 03:04:32 PM2. I can do lots of shit. I'm a Holy Man™.
"Some say he is a Holy Man..."
Quote from: Pere Ubu on October 09, 2013, 06:31:24 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on October 09, 2013, 03:04:32 PM2. I can do lots of shit. I'm a Holy Man™.
"Some say he is a Holy Man..."
Now why does that sound familiar.
ETA: Note the lack of question mark.
I LEGITIMATELY ENJOY LISTENING TO SKRILLEX
(http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/Smileys/default/iregretnothing.gif)
I'm sorry that I ate ghost pepper wings for lunch and sushi with Trinidad scorpion pepper on it for dinner yesterday. Sorry for anyone that may need to use a bathroom after me and sorry to my digestive tract.