Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 23, 2013, 04:41:24 AM

Title: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 23, 2013, 04:41:24 AM
...

What is going ON over there?

http://www.thelocal.se/20131221/swedens-christmas-goat-torched-yet-again

QuoteSweden's Christmas goat torched yet again

Gävle's Yuletide goat has failed to survive until Christmas after it was set on fire during the early hours of Saturday morning in what has become an infamous annual event.


The massive straw goat, which this year had been beefed up with flame retardant liquid, has long been a target for arsonists since the first one was erected in the central Swedish city in 1966.

Police authorities were alerted at 4am that the 13-metre tall Gävle goat (Gävlebocken) was on fire and emergency services were quickly on the scene.

"We are out looking with patrols and as usual keeping an open mind on this matter," Fredrik Nilsson of the Gävle police told Aftonbladet.

He added to the TT news agency; "I have a hard time believing that it may have started because of natural causes."

In November officials in Gävle were confident the 2013 vintage would stand a chance of surviving through the holiday season telling The Local that it "should be much harder to burn down."

However, such optimism proved unfounded with the latest arson attack leaving members of the local goat committee dismayed.
"We are really sorry. We are supposed to celebrate Christmas and New Year with the goat in place. We are very sorry that it can't be just left be," said Maria Nässert, spokesperson for the goat committee in Gävle to TT.

The goat has made headlines in the past after Swedes tried to kidnap the structure by helicopter and after some youths got suspicious goat tattoos shortly after it burned down last year. Once, an American tourist was convicted of arson after he burned it to the ground, thinking it was a harmless tradition and not realizing such an act was indeed against the law.

Indeed, the goat has been burned to the ground more often than it has been left standing. It was first torched in 1969 while the class of 1977 only got to bleat for six hours.

The goat, which has its own Twitter account, posted a message on Friday saying it felt "confident" and was "longing for Christmas.

After it was set ablaze the goat took to the social media network to express its sorrow but did keep the Yuletide spirit alive by wishing its thousands of followers a happy Christmas.

"I'm so sad my friends that I have to leave you now! Thank you for this year! Take care and have a Merry Christmas and a happy new year!" posted the Gävlebocken. 

Local media reported that the goat has been set ablaze at least 24 times since the first one was put on display back in 1966.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on December 23, 2013, 05:06:02 AM
. . . what the ever-loving . . . what? I don't. What? No.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Eater of Clowns on December 23, 2013, 05:50:21 AM
QuoteIn November officials in Gävle were confident the 2013 vintage would stand a chance of surviving through the holiday season telling The Local that it "should be much harder to burn down."

There's your problem. There's your problem right there.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 23, 2013, 05:51:35 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 23, 2013, 05:50:21 AM
QuoteIn November officials in Gävle were confident the 2013 vintage would stand a chance of surviving through the holiday season telling The Local that it "should be much harder to burn down."

There's your problem. There's your problem right there.

:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Odibex Grallspice on December 23, 2013, 07:10:41 AM
How many times in this article did they said "the goat" The goat, the Goat, THE GOAT!
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 23, 2013, 07:10:54 AM
Which part of Belgium is Sweden again?  Is it the landlocked one, or the one with the hairy fucking viking assholes?
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 23, 2013, 07:11:27 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 23, 2013, 05:50:21 AM
QuoteIn November officials in Gävle were confident the 2013 vintage would stand a chance of surviving through the holiday season telling The Local that it "should be much harder to burn down."

There's your problem. There's your problem right there.

Fill the fucking thing full of RDX.  That will teach the arsonist little bastards.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 23, 2013, 07:29:30 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on December 23, 2013, 07:10:54 AM
Which part of Belgium is Sweden again?  Is it the landlocked one, or the one with the hairy fucking viking assholes?

I think it's North Belgium.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 23, 2013, 07:30:08 AM
Quote from: Odibex Grallspice on December 23, 2013, 07:10:41 AM
How many times in this article did they said "the goat" The goat, the Goat, THE GOAT!

THE GOAT.

Also at one point they referred to "the 2013 vintage". Of the goat.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Lenin McCarthy on December 23, 2013, 12:15:11 PM
I'm not surprised. It's Sweden, after all.

but "goat committee"  :lulz:
and "tried to kidnap the structure by helicopter"  :lulz:

Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: hooplala on December 23, 2013, 12:42:48 PM
See, this seems like the perfect time for bipeds to reassess the situation. Clearly, the people WANT an annual goat burning festival. Boom. Done.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 23, 2013, 06:30:39 PM
Quote from: Hoopla on December 23, 2013, 12:42:48 PM
See, this seems like the perfect time for bipeds to reassess the situation. Clearly, the people WANT an annual goat burning festival. Boom. Done.

BINGO!
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: EK WAFFLR on December 23, 2013, 06:33:02 PM
Quote from: Lenin McCarthy on December 23, 2013, 12:15:11 PM
I'm not surprised. It's Sweden, after all.

but "goat committee"  :lulz:
and "tried to kidnap the structure by helicopter"  :lulz:

Goat Committee, now THAT'S black metal !
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Eater of Clowns on December 23, 2013, 08:29:32 PM
Quote from: Nigel's Red Velveteen Skinmeat Snacks on December 23, 2013, 06:30:39 PM
Quote from: Hoopla on December 23, 2013, 12:42:48 PM
See, this seems like the perfect time for bipeds to reassess the situation. Clearly, the people WANT an annual goat burning festival. Boom. Done.

BINGO!

They're missing out on serious tourism dollars by not embracing it. They already have this story, they could probably get a big follow up if they made it official, and then people start rolling into their town from all over to see the event.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: hooplala on December 23, 2013, 08:35:03 PM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on December 23, 2013, 08:29:32 PM
Quote from: Nigel's Red Velveteen Skinmeat Snacks on December 23, 2013, 06:30:39 PM
Quote from: Hoopla on December 23, 2013, 12:42:48 PM
See, this seems like the perfect time for bipeds to reassess the situation. Clearly, the people WANT an annual goat burning festival. Boom. Done.

BINGO!

They're missing out on serious tourism dollars by not embracing it. They already have this story, they could probably get a big follow up if they made it official, and then people start rolling into their town from all over to see the event.

It's true, I haven't missed a burning wicker man in Summerisle in years, and they have fuck all else there... except apples.  And fertility rites.  Well, actually I come for the rites, but the burning is good too.
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Reginald Ret on December 24, 2013, 01:41:43 AM
I think part of the fun is not being allowed to burn or helicopter-goatnap but doing it anyway. I am looking forward to more creative forms of goatdestruction in the future. Maybe dissolve in acid as a tribute to the Nobel Prize?
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Pergamos on December 24, 2013, 02:36:51 AM
Quote from: :regret: on December 24, 2013, 01:41:43 AM
I think part of the fun is not being allowed to burn or helicopter-goatnap but doing it anyway. I am looking forward to more creative forms of goatdestruction in the future. Maybe dissolve in acid as a tribute to the Nobel Prize?

Wouldn't dynamiting the goat be more nobel?
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: carnival on December 24, 2013, 03:58:04 AM
(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3239/5740610552_1d25f1e7fb.jpg)
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Reginald Ret on December 24, 2013, 04:00:30 AM
Quote from: Pergamos on December 24, 2013, 02:36:51 AM
Quote from: :regret: on December 24, 2013, 01:41:43 AM
I think part of the fun is not being allowed to burn or helicopter-goatnap but doing it anyway. I am looking forward to more creative forms of goatdestruction in the future. Maybe dissolve in acid as a tribute to the Nobel Prize?

Wouldn't dynamiting the goat be more nobel?

When Germany invaded Denmark in World War II, Hungarian chemist George de Hevesy dissolved the gold Nobel Prizes of German physicists Max von Laue (1914) and James Franck (1925) in aqua regia to prevent the Nazis from confiscating them. The German government had prohibited Germans from accepting or keeping any Nobel Prize after jailed peace activist Carl von Ossietzky had received the Nobel Peace Prize in 1935. De Hevesy placed the resulting solution on a shelf in his laboratory at the Niels Bohr Institute. It was subsequently ignored by the Nazis who thought the jar—one of perhaps hundreds on the shelving—contained common chemicals. After the war, de Hevesy returned to find the solution undisturbed and precipitated the gold out of the acid. The gold was returned to the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences and the Nobel Foundation. They re-cast the medals and again presented them to Laue and Franck. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aqua_regia#History)

8)
Title: Re: Um, Sweden?
Post by: Nephew Twiddleton on December 24, 2013, 06:13:53 PM
I like that the goat has its own twitter account and apologized for its needing to leave. It makes it that much more sadfunny. I like that one year a helicopter was involved. I like how theres a goat committee and the goat committee in their exasperation have to go why cant people just leave the goat alone. Its all brilliant.