Doktors,
As I write this, I am passing over Hudson's Bay, a huge & horrible wasteland...Sort of like God's ice cube tray, now with added black flies. I have as of this moment, been back in the land of the living for 12 hours. However, 6 of those hours were spent sitting on the tarmac while mechanics put the forward cargo door back on; it having apparently just sort of fell off. A 747/400 is an absurdly large aircraft, so I was a little surprised that anyone noticed. Nothing to worry about, just Tucson trying to bring us back home the fast way.
It IS in fact a huge aircraft. The fact that something this large can actually get off the ground is somehow insulting in a vague sort of way. It certainly has no business 6 miles up, blasting along at 500 MPH. There are 10 seats per row, each seat large enough for a good-sized circus midget, and the seat cushions may be flotation devices, but they are certainly not very cushiony. I have 6-7 more hours on this flight, and I fear for my ass.
Also, there are no utility outlets on this ancient thing, so my battery life is limited. In fact, the only reason I am using this laptop is to recharge my e-cig batteries. The flight attendants do not know what to do about the e-cig, incidentally. Since the TSA allows the airlines to make the decision, I figured I would just use the damn thing and see what happened. I am being very carefully ignored by Hessian women who fear no passenger, provided the rules are clear. But suddenly they are NOT clear, and the Teutonic lovelies have no structure. My actions led to what seems to be a general uprising, and those with e-cigs are using them. Those primitive nicotine addicts who still rely on combustion are helpless with envy. Hans in the seat next to me, for example.
Hans is a nice fellow, and we've cheerfully talked about the 30 years war for the last 3 hours, which seems to be annoying the other Germans on the flight. It's not the war they object to, it's the idea that - before said war - the Germans were the least orderly and/or disciplined people in Europe. I gather that it is like reminding people that Jim Bowie was a human-trafficking scumbag, and that Santa Anna was the GOOD GUY. While it may be TRUE, it is one of those truths that people do not wish to hear about. An inconvenient fact, as welcome as a turd in the bedsheets.
We are flying into the dawn, and I cannot see it. The window shades are required to be in the down position, and the observation deck (this is the BIG 747) is closed, after some sort of incident involving the bathroom. After the huge delay on the ground, and someone being hauled off the plane by federal police during said wait, nobody wants to ask about the bathroom. The person's hand was dyed blue, they say, and there's only one way that happens at 36000 feet...And nobody wants to talk about it except me.
I have used fully 10% of my battery life so far. This isn't looking good. What the hell is this country coming to, when HP can sell us shit batteries and get away with it? Granted, I am charging 2 e-cig batteries and a Zune, but still.
We are on our 3rd in flight movie, all of which have been chick flicks, the first one starring the Tony Soprano guy, and which seemed to have less plot than Lost in Translation. It was basically dinner, party, dinner, party, sex (after the fact) with a woman 2/3rds his age, dinner, dinner, dinner, lesbian sex with the woman in question and some other lady that appeared in the movie just for that purpose (again, you see the afterglow, 70s-action film style, but not the actual gymnastics. I'm okay with that. Tony Soprano.) Dinner, dinner, party, movie over. There was no conflict, let alone resolution. I feel ripped off. With Tony Soprano involved, I expect people being stuffed in oil barrels in between dinner parties and bouts of the sort of sex that leaves all the sheets on the bed (seriously, who does that?).
My ass is falling off, and we aren't even over the Atlantic yet. If I don't make it through this, have my sore-ridden carcass flung out of a plane over Tucson. I shall take care of the rest of the arrangements myself. WHO THE FUCK DOES THIS TRIP FOR FUN? I do not have a boney ass. No. I am unfortunately well padded, yet I am in agony. And I am not alone. At least 25 people have gotten dramatic and very sudden motion sickness, and the plane smells like a frat house on a Sunday morning.
I should have stayed safely dead in Tucson, where there is only one smell. That of a full ashtray 6 days after the party. Disgusting, yes, but far better than this planeload of unwashed and puking freaks. The lady two seats over is wearing the Muslim head dress thingie, and it looks like a Jawa being sick.
Chick flick number 3 seems to be one of those "men are the new women" flicks, stars nobody, and has no plot. The guy between me and the ill Muslim lady has taken his shoes off for reasons unknown, and I may well throw up on him. SOCKS. THEY EXIST FOR A REASON. Oh, and one of the flight attendants dropped a pot of coffee in the aisle, lightly scalding Felipe and the Italian lady in front of me...The lady that complained to the crew that Hans and I were being too loud. RAT OUT A HOLY MAN, WILL YOU? Too bad Felipe was collateral damage. Anyway, my battery is now green, so I shall sign off for now, until I get to the hotel and REMEMER TO PLUG THE VOLTAGE ADAPTOR IN TO THE WALL BEFORE THE LAPTOP. 380 volts 50 hertz? WHY? WHY CAN'T THEY JUST BE LIKE US?
More later.
This was surprisingly delightful. "Large enough for a good-sized circus midget". :lol:
O.o Tucson says you don't need a door so you don't need a door. And it was put back on anyway? My my, someone wants a spanking.
Glad you dodged the hot coffee. Remember to sigh with great satisfaction after each puff of your e-cig.
In Hanau now. I could listen to the fucking German weatherman all day. Their language rocks. 30 feet from my hotel room is the Old City wall, which is about 400 years old. It's not maintained, and nobody has wrecked it. This area wasn't bombed in WWII, so I imagine everyone just likes their nice stuff.
The news guy is now talking about John Kerry. I can't understand a word, but he's definitely laughing. It's about 7C here, and they're now talking about the winter disaster on the East coast/Midwest. I came for the artic weather, but I stayed for the nice brisk fall day.
Seriously, if I could stay here forever, I would. This place is awesome. Not that I've seen anyone...Hanau shuts down out of season, and we found ONE (1) restaurant open for the weekend. Also, it's 8 AM, and the sun isn't properly up yet. I think this may very well be heaven.
Mike has sulked in his room all day and night, after I wouldn't let him rent a Porshe. He doesn't need a fucking Porshe. It only seats two and the other three of us have agreed that we are doing NO DRIVING. So we wound up with something Mercedes that looks suspiciously like a minivan. A proper minivan? No. It had to be a Mercedes. If you've ever ridden in a Mercedes, you're already laughing. They are Shriner cars. We are large people. It isn't funny, so shut up.
Also, it turns out that the only actual workdays we have here are Tuesday and Wednesday. We are going to make Mike take us to castles and cathedrals. Pictures will be posted on my return.
One odd thing. We took one pic at the Hanau church, and we all look pasty white and kinda translucent. No joke.
I TOLD YOU WE WERE DEAD.
Something occurred to me. The funniest part about Americans, to Germans, seems to be the idea of "rugged individualism" or even individualism as expressed by Americans.
"No wonder your government fucks you. You are disorganized. You are easy prey."
They might be onto something. Maybe we've been doing it wrong.
We are going to go crawl around in some castles and shit. Back in 6 hours or so, which is when most of You People will be awake, anyway.
More later.
GO ROGER GO!
Just returned from Heidelberg Castle. We got lost finding it, after accidentally driving under it. In any case, once we found parking (4 floors below ground, there's something here about burrowing that vaguely disturbs me), we decided it would be manly to walk up to the castle, rather than taking the tram.
That's 1100 meters at a 30 degree grade.
Thank God I quit smoking and stuck with the treadmill. I was breathing pretty hard at the top, but when I turned around, Felipe was 300 meters behind, and Steve & Mike were 800 meters back leaning against the wall. Pictures of this and the castle when I get back to the states.
In any case, I was blown away. Access to about 50% of the castle is restricted, due to reconstruction and/or preservation efforts, but it still took 4 hours to tour the rest.
And this isn't some frou-frou castle, though the interior artwork is intense. The approach we came up reveals what can't be see from the valley floor: The castle batteries dominate the river, and the actual approach has multiple switchbacks with firing ports (for matchlocks, this castle is post-gunpowder) and there's a twitchy feeling you get when you realize the roof above you is riddled with murder holes. Entire galleries exist only as a killing jar for attacking forces. If you had 200 men, you could hold off tens of thousands. It's badass.
And then there's the artwork. Rows of statues, going up 7 floors in the courtyard. Frescoes, you name it. And the winery/brewery has casks the size of large boilers. The apothecary museum is worth the trip all by itself.
I highly recommend it. But now I am worn the fuck out, and Steve has been paralyzed by car sickness. The autobahn didn't agree with him.
QuoteSteve has been paralyzed by car sickness. The autobahn didn't agree with him
Those fancy foreign foods always mess people's stomachs up. Autobahn is the
worst.
Quote from: Cain on January 05, 2014, 02:57:55 PM
QuoteSteve has been paralyzed by car sickness. The autobahn didn't agree with him
Those fancy foreign foods always mess people's stomachs up. Autobahn is the worst.
I told him to boil it first, but you know Americans.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 05, 2014, 07:21:12 AM
Something occurred to me. The funniest part about Americans, to Germans, seems to be the idea of "rugged individualism" or even individualism as expressed by Americans.
"No wonder your government fucks you. You are disorganized. You are easy prey."
They might be onto something. Maybe we've been doing it wrong.
I rather suspect so.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 05, 2014, 02:53:26 PM
Just returned from Heidelberg Castle. We got lost finding it, after accidentally driving under it. In any case, once we found parking (4 floors below ground, there's something here about burrowing that vaguely disturbs me), we decided it would be manly to walk up to the castle, rather than taking the tram.
That's 1100 meters at a 30 degree grade.
Thank God I quit smoking and stuck with the treadmill. I was breathing pretty hard at the top, but when I turned around, Felipe was 300 meters behind, and Steve & Mike were 800 meters back leaning against the wall. Pictures of this and the castle when I get back to the states.
In any case, I was blown away. Access to about 50% of the castle is restricted, due to reconstruction and/or preservation efforts, but it still took 4 hours to tour the rest.
And this isn't some frou-frou castle, though the interior artwork is intense. The approach we came up reveals what can't be see from the valley floor: The castle batteries dominate the river, and the actual approach has multiple switchbacks with firing ports (for matchlocks, this castle is post-gunpowder) and there's a twitchy feeling you get when you realize the roof above you is riddled with murder holes. Entire galleries exist only as a killing jar for attacking forces. If you had 200 men, you could hold off tens of thousands. It's badass.
And then there's the artwork. Rows of statues, going up 7 floors in the courtyard. Frescoes, you name it. And the winery/brewery has casks the size of large boilers. The apothecary museum is worth the trip all by itself.
I highly recommend it. But now I am worn the fuck out, and Steve has been paralyzed by car sickness. The autobahn didn't agree with him.
Someday, I want to see this! I shall.
I told you it would be better than Nashville.
Quote from: Nigel's Red Velveteen Skinmeat Snacks on January 05, 2014, 06:14:30 PM
I told you it would be better than Nashville.
We did have our first brush with Teutonic rudeness, which actually makes me feel better about this place...It was seeming too good to be true.
We asked the lady running the gift shop where the funilcar to the valley was, and she said (in an otherwise empty shop) "I don't have time to answer questions."
The funilcar entrance was 60 feet away, around a corner. One of the guards told us where it was, and mentioned that the lady in the gift shop "is from Bavaria, and thus cannot be held accountable" (Apparently, Bavaria is sort of like Texas).
I didn't mention that earlier. They repurposed two resupply tunnels, 300 meters long, and now have a subway at a 28 degree angle (did I mention that they burrow, here?). We could have ridden that up, but we were feeling manly. We didn't feel manly at the top, we felt like emphysema victims.
:lulz:
Bavaria is a bit...weird. I don't know if can be exactly compared to Texas...it's mostly Catholic in a Protestant country, it's more luxurious than the austere north, more decadent and libertine, with a greater love of life and appreciation for joy, but those traits can easily be inverted when the darker side of Bavaria comes to the fore. It is also the Nazi heartland, after all. Unrestrained id, maybe.
Quote from: Cain on January 05, 2014, 07:01:45 PM
Bavaria is a bit...weird. I don't know if can be exactly compared to Texas...it's mostly Catholic in a Protestant country, it's more luxurious than the austere north, more decadent and libertine, with a greater love of life and appreciation for joy, but those traits can easily be inverted when the darker side of Bavaria comes to the fore. It is also the Nazi heartland, after all. Unrestrained id, maybe.
Probably.
Also, Mike has been his usual endearing self. Everything we do is reimbursed. Our company NEVER makes an issue out of an expense report, even if they're a tad dodgy, and always has the money in our account 72 hours after we file.
So we go out to eat, which is unquestionably an expense. Then Mike bitches and whines if it has to go on HIS card. He'll get the reimbursement before he gets the bill. AND he makes 3 times what I make, and I make more than the other two. So I just put the shit on my card.
Went out to eat this evening with one of the local company guys. Mike insisted on separate cheques.
:? and :horrormirth: and :lulz:
I think he's pissed because A, I'm in charge, and B, I wouldn't let him rent a Porshe.
On the burrowing thing, I don't know if you'll be near any but google "war tunnels". I know Jeresy had a fair few and if I recall correctly some on the mainland near major cities were turned into museums. It's worth a look if there's any such thing near you.
Also, putting money on Mike losing required paper to claim expenses properly. It just seems inevitable.
Make it inevitable.
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 05, 2014, 07:17:13 PM
On the burrowing thing, I don't know if you'll be near any but google "war tunnels". I know Jeresy had a fair few and if I recall correctly some on the mainland near major cities were turned into museums. It's worth a look if there's any such thing near you.
I've been underground more than I've been above ground, and I have limited time. I'm concentrating on 30 years war era stuff.
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 05, 2014, 07:21:15 PM
Also, putting money on Mike losing required paper to claim expenses properly. It just seems inevitable.
Make it inevitable.
You have got to be kidding. That tightwad will DIE before his expenses aren't SURPLUS to actual expenses. NO SHIT, the guy tracks the exchange rate daily on a spreadsheet. Because last time, that saved him $3.75. He won't shut up about it.
My layover on the return trip is Heathrow.
JOY JOY JOY I CAN'T WAIT IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS 2 HOURS IN HEATHROW IS LIKE FREE ROOT CANAL WORK!
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 05, 2014, 07:24:02 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 05, 2014, 07:21:15 PM
Also, putting money on Mike losing required paper to claim expenses properly. It just seems inevitable.
Make it inevitable.
You have got to be kidding. That tightwad will DIE before his expenses aren't SURPLUS to actual expenses. NO SHIT, the guy tracks the exchange rate daily on a spreadsheet. Because last time, that saved him $3.75. He won't shut up about it.
The solution would seem to be inflict a non refundable expense on him greater than $4 and remind him of this endlessly.
And Heathrow. Have fun with that "2 hours". Ha. Haha. HAHAHAHA
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 05, 2014, 07:29:32 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 05, 2014, 07:24:02 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 05, 2014, 07:21:15 PM
Also, putting money on Mike losing required paper to claim expenses properly. It just seems inevitable.
Make it inevitable.
You have got to be kidding. That tightwad will DIE before his expenses aren't SURPLUS to actual expenses. NO SHIT, the guy tracks the exchange rate daily on a spreadsheet. Because last time, that saved him $3.75. He won't shut up about it.
The solution would seem to be inflict a non refundable expense on him greater than $4 and remind him of this endlessly.
And Heathrow. Have fun with that "2 hours". Ha. Haha. HAHAHAHA
1. You can't get this guy to actually spend shit. He wanted me to put the diesel for the Mercedes on my card. :lulz:
2. Even just going from gate to gate in Heathrow is worse than the whole deal at Ohare. This sucks.
Fun read, Roger. Sounds like a great trip.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 05, 2014, 07:21:12 AM
Something occurred to me. The funniest part about Americans, to Germans, seems to be the idea of "rugged individualism" or even individualism as expressed by Americans.
"No wonder your government fucks you. You are disorganized. You are easy prey."
They might be onto something. Maybe we've been doing it wrong.
YES.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 05, 2014, 07:27:52 PM
My layover on the return trip is Heathrow.
JOY JOY JOY I CAN'T WAIT IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS 2 HOURS IN HEATHROW IS LIKE FREE ROOT CANAL WORK!
That's just AMERICA
(TM) closing back in on you.
Seriously, everybody I know who goes to Europe says coming back feels like shit and oppression.
Quote from: Tiddleywomp Cockletit on January 06, 2014, 02:20:35 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 05, 2014, 07:27:52 PM
My layover on the return trip is Heathrow.
JOY JOY JOY I CAN'T WAIT IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS 2 HOURS IN HEATHROW IS LIKE FREE ROOT CANAL WORK!
That's just AMERICA(TM) closing back in on you.
Seriously, everybody I know who goes to Europe says coming back feels like shit and oppression.
I get that coming back from Canada, and Canada isn't really all that much better than the USA, these days.
If you're going through Terminal 5, remember to point and laugh at the lightbulbs (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/10472481/Heathrow-seeks-high-wire-walkers-to-change-light-bulbs.html).
Quote from: Cain on January 06, 2014, 10:42:53 AM
If you're going through Terminal 5, remember to point and laugh at the lightbulbs (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/10472481/Heathrow-seeks-high-wire-walkers-to-change-light-bulbs.html).
Quote
Various ways of replacing them have been investigated, including gondolas and high-level cherry pickers, none of which were deemed "practical or safe".
Following months of discussion, the airport has finally found a "safe and robust way to replace all of the light bulbs" using 'Cirque du Soleil-style' high-level rope work done by a specialist company.
YOUR ENGLAND IS BROKEN.
I still love that no-one thought about this when installing the bulbs in the first place. I know science education isn't a priority (especially not when it cuts into valuable time that could be spent extolling the martial virtues of the Empire in WWI), but what did they expect to happen, that magical Polish lightbulb faeires would magic in new ones?
Quote from: Cain on January 06, 2014, 10:47:29 AM
I still love that no-one thought about this when installing the bulbs in the first place. I know science education isn't a priority (especially not when it cuts into valuable time that could be spent extolling the martial virtues of the Empire in WWI), but what did they expect to happen, that magical Polish lightbulb faeires would magic in new ones?
Same thing happened in our plant. FIRST they put the sodium lights WAY THE FUCK UP THERE, THEN they pit the kilns in. Every week I get a notification to change the lights. Every week I cheerfully pass it on to engineering, who did this in the first fucking place.
Everywhere I go seems to be unseasonably warm.
I brought the Tucson, where's the party?
Ask Angela Merkel. Didn't take you long to break her pelvis did it Tucson boi?
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 06, 2014, 10:44:39 AM
Quote from: Cain on January 06, 2014, 10:42:53 AM
If you're going through Terminal 5, remember to point and laugh at the lightbulbs (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/10472481/Heathrow-seeks-high-wire-walkers-to-change-light-bulbs.html).
Quote
Various ways of replacing them have been investigated, including gondolas and high-level cherry pickers, none of which were deemed "practical or safe".
Following months of discussion, the airport has finally found a "safe and robust way to replace all of the light bulbs" using 'Cirque du Soleil-style' high-level rope work done by a specialist company.
YOUR ENGLAND IS BROKEN.
Wait what? Cherry Pickers are dangerous but cirque du soleil kind of shit is risk free?
Someone's sniffing glue or been bribed surely.
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 06, 2014, 12:55:46 PM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 06, 2014, 10:44:39 AM
Quote from: Cain on January 06, 2014, 10:42:53 AM
If you're going through Terminal 5, remember to point and laugh at the lightbulbs (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/travelnews/10472481/Heathrow-seeks-high-wire-walkers-to-change-light-bulbs.html).
Quote
Various ways of replacing them have been investigated, including gondolas and high-level cherry pickers, none of which were deemed "practical or safe".
Following months of discussion, the airport has finally found a "safe and robust way to replace all of the light bulbs" using 'Cirque du Soleil-style' high-level rope work done by a specialist company.
YOUR ENGLAND IS BROKEN.
Wait what? Cherry Pickers are dangerous but cirque du soleil kind of shit is risk free?
Someone's sniffing glue or been bribed surely.
Well, they're
artists, dammit.
Oh art.
That makes much more sense now, it's most likely funded by the national lottery.
If they're artists, then of course, they're expendable.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 06, 2014, 03:45:15 PM
If they're artists, then of course, they're expendable.
It isn't really art if you don't suffer for it.
Well, I certainly hope they don't expect to get paid.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 06, 2014, 07:22:18 PM
Well, I certainly hope they don't expect to get paid.
I know someone who is getting paid. Mike. The others asked him "isn't Roger coming out to eat?", and Mike said, "No, he's sleeping." I've been awake the whole time, he never called or knocked on my door.
So, making do with room service, plotting horrible revenge.
You'd think he would know better by now.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 06, 2014, 07:28:09 PM
You'd think he would know better by now.
You'd think. So I'm going to suffer through breast of chicken in sesame, and he's going to have fun tomorrow.
More fun that he really wanted, I mean.
Also, hotels here do not have laundry rooms. This came as quite a shock to me.
I was pretty sure you were going to order the smothered hangar steak with a side of broccoli.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 06, 2014, 07:31:44 PM
I was pretty sure you were going to order the smothered hangar steak with a side of broccoli.
Naw. Beef. No red meat for Roger, or my blood turns into jello pudding. Fortunately, pork isn't included in that, and neither is bird.
Ah, I see. I was thinking the red meat would make Mike suffer more, but it looks like you'd get the brunt of it.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 06, 2014, 08:07:33 PM
Ah, I see. I was thinking the red meat would make Mike suffer more, but it looks like you'd get the brunt of it.
Oh, yeah. It's pretty damn painful.
Tomorrow, we actually go to work. For two days. Then one more day of fucking off, then the 14 hour horrorshow.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 06, 2014, 07:30:23 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 06, 2014, 07:28:09 PM
You'd think he would know better by now.
You'd think. So I'm going to suffer through breast of chicken in sesame, and he's going to have fun tomorrow.
More fun that he really wanted, I mean.
Also, hotels here do not have laundry rooms. This came as quite a shock to me.
*stops before reading remainder of thread*
Squees in delight
Can't you drop Mike down an oubliette or something? All those castles and not a single convenient place to drop a turd. I'm glad everything else seems to be going well, though.
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on January 07, 2014, 05:38:28 AM
Can't you drop Mike down an oubliette or something? All those castles and not a single convenient place to drop a turd. I'm glad everything else seems to be going well, though.
Well, Mike managed to hand me my revenge all gold-plated and shit.
The new machine has two significant improvements over our own method, one of which is AMAZING, the other is handy.
Guess which one Mike didn't have quoted to save a few bucks? I have spent the entire day rolling his fat ass around in his own poop.
Excellent!
In 2002, I learned to never go drinking beer with Germans on a weeknight.
Somehow, I forgot that lesson. I will be a sick puppy in the morning. One fun thing, though, was the new guy from the vendor using the term Dalak used here to describe drug use: "testing".
I informed him that we do not "test a chemical", we "do all the drugs we can motherfucking handle". There is no "testing". This is a PARTY, not a LABORATORY.
Kids these days. DOING IT WRONG.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 07, 2014, 07:57:00 PM
In 2002, I learned to never go drinking beer with Germans on a weeknight.
Somehow, I forgot that lesson. I will be a sick puppy in the morning. One fun thing, though, was the new guy from the vendor using the term Dalak used here to describe drug use: "testing".
I informed him that we do not "test a chemical", we "do all the drugs we can motherfucking handle". There is no "testing". This is a PARTY, not a LABORATORY.
Kids these days. DOING IT WRONG.
Seriously, that is the most irritating thing.
Back in Frankfurt proper, at the hideously over-priced and gaudy Hilton Gardens. The restaurant serves a checken caesar salad for a measly $23.86 American, and the room is just a little smaller than I'd expect on a cruise ship. I am no longer in Germany, I am in an adjunct of America. An extrusion, if you will. All the rudeness, the "here to go" mentality. Only the nice young lady at the bookstore seemed to actually be human.
You could have a zombiepocalypse here, and nobody would notice.
Interesting note: Lots of young German salary-men walking around. I've spent some time with them, and I am apparently considered some kind of big wheel, because I do not have limits on my expense account. They must ensure that every meal is below a certain amount of Euro based on their rank, etc. They have a uniform. Black suit, white shirt, subdued tie, and they are all painfully thin.
Also, it was brought to my attention that Mike is and has been quite afraid of me on a physical level, and intimidated on a professional level, which would certainly explain a lot of his behavior over the years. I snapped at him in a meeting this morning (I needed information from the vendor's engineer, Mike kept interrupting to show how big his slide rule is), and he's been sulking all day. Steve takes me aside and tells me that Mike was basically shitting himself.
This surprises me, to be perfectly honest. Mike lives in a world where violence does not even exist in an abstract form. It is something that happens where smudgy people live. To him, studliness is measured in the size of your car and the expense of your watch. I am more than a little shocked that he even contemplated violence being performed on him by me or anyone else.
And of course I had no intention or even a real urge to do so. But I snapped at him, and he interpreted it as a threatening situation. Which is strange to me, because I do not consider myself a very scary person. Felipe is ten times meaner looking.
Last thing: Mike tucks his napkin into his shirt like a bib. He has to. His food goes everywhere. It's embarrassing.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 09, 2014, 11:58:22 AM
Back in Frankfurt proper, at the hideously over-priced and gaudy Hilton Gardens. The restaurant serves a checken caesar salad for a measly $23.86 American, and the room is just a little smaller than I'd expect on a cruise ship. I am no longer in Germany, I am in an adjunct of America. An extrusion, if you will. All the rudeness, the "here to go" mentality. Only the nice young lady at the bookstore seemed to actually be human.
You could have a zombiepocalypse here, and nobody would notice.
Interesting note: Lots of young German salary-men walking around. I've spent some time with them, and I am apparently considered some kind of big wheel, because I do not have limits on my expense account. They must ensure that every meal is below a certain amount of Euro based on their rank, etc. They have a uniform. Black suit, white shirt, subdued tie, and they are all painfully thin.
Also, it was brought to my attention that Mike is and has been quite afraid of me on a physical level, and intimidated on a professional level, which would certainly explain a lot of his behavior over the years. I snapped at him in a meeting this morning (I needed information from the vendor's engineer, Mike kept interrupting to show how big his slide rule is), and he's been sulking all day. Steve takes me aside and tells me that Mike was basically shitting himself.
This surprises me, to be perfectly honest. Mike lives in a world where violence does not even exist in an abstract form. It is something that happens where smudgy people live. To him, studliness is measured in the size of your car and the expense of your watch. I am more than a little shocked that he even contemplated violence being performed on him by me or anyone else.
And of course I had no intention or even a real urge to do so. But I snapped at him, and he interpreted it as a threatening situation. Which is strange to me, because I do not consider myself a very scary person. Felipe is ten times meaner looking.
Last thing: Mike tucks his napkin into his shirt like a bib. He has to. His food goes everywhere. It's embarrassing.
I love reading about Mike.
Poor Mike. He's the very definition of "pathetic".
And "craven". :lol:
Hey, is everybody really rigid about punctuality over there? Somebody told me they suggested going to get something to eat, and the reply was "No, it's fifteen till six. We eat at six o'clock."
Quote from: Tiddleywomp Cockletit on January 10, 2014, 12:34:33 AM
And "craven". :lol:
Hey, is everybody really rigid about punctuality over there? Somebody told me they suggested going to get something to eat, and the reply was "No, it's fifteen till six. We eat at six o'clock."
They had to have been fucking with her!
I FUCKING HATE HEATHROW. HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE
Now in San Francisco. Airport code SFO. :lulz:
Quote from: Nigel's Red Velveteen Skinmeat Snacks on January 10, 2014, 11:52:54 PM
Quote from: Tiddleywomp Cockletit on January 10, 2014, 12:34:33 AM
And "craven". :lol:
Hey, is everybody really rigid about punctuality over there? Somebody told me they suggested going to get something to eat, and the reply was "No, it's fifteen till six. We eat at six o'clock."
They had to have been fucking with her!
I hope so.
Because I want to believe things are better someplace, and not just a different kind of fucked. :lol:
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 11, 2014, 02:59:49 AM
Now in San Francisco. Airport code SFO. :lulz:
Last leg.
Do you have time to run around there?
Nope.
Had a flight out in a puddle jumper the moment we arrived, more or less. To Tucson. The End of the Line. Nobody transfers through Tucson. It is not a hub of any kind. You're either coming or going, and if you are going, it is with the sure & certain knowledge that you'll be back before you know it.
Ah, so you are now back in the land of the dead.
You got Tucson all over Germany. OSHI-
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 07, 2014, 05:41:42 PM
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on January 07, 2014, 05:38:28 AM
Can't you drop Mike down an oubliette or something? All those castles and not a single convenient place to drop a turd. I'm glad everything else seems to be going well, though.
Well, Mike managed to hand me my revenge all gold-plated and shit.
The new machine has two significant improvements over our own method, one of which is AMAZING, the other is handy.
Guess which one Mike didn't have quoted to save a few bucks? I have spent the entire day rolling his fat ass around in his own poop.
Just saw this. Mike . . . I really pity that guy sometimes. He's chum in the water and he knows it, but just can't help flailing around to attract as many sharks as possible.