Holy fuck, I wish this was a joke.
http://celebrity.yahoo.com/news/kristen-stewart-star-romantic-adaptation-quot-1984-quot-004000170-us-weekly.html
Can't we get them to star Jennifer Lawrence in the dystopian adaptation of Wuthering Heights, instead?
Quote from: Random Probability on January 16, 2014, 12:07:20 AM
Can't we get them to star Jennifer Lawrence in the dystopian adaptation of Wuthering Heights, instead?
At least Jennifer Lawrence can, you know, act.
All I can think of us Stewart saying, "Doubleplusungood." With a raised eyebrow through her teeth.
She was awesome as Joan Jett. Don't be like everyone else and typecast her because of Twilight.
Quote from: Random Probability on January 16, 2014, 12:07:20 AM
Can't we get them to star Jennifer Lawrence in the dystopian adaptation of Wuthering Heights, instead?
Wuthering Heights is
already dystopian, no adaptation needed. :lol:
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 01:01:09 AM
She was awesome as Joan Jett. Don't be like everyone else and typecast her because of Twilight.
She was a plank in Snow white and the huntsman. That's all I have to go on of her, I'll give the runaways a look but I find your claim bold and hard to believe given what I have seen.
I hope to be pleasantly surprised.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 01:01:09 AM
She was awesome as Joan Jett. Don't be like everyone else and typecast her because of Twilight.
I agree.
So she gets rats.
I'm okay with this.
:lulz:
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 02:43:52 AM
So she gets rats.
I'm okay with this.
:lulz:
My former boss just told me that she may just be the perfect role for someone's forehead to get stepped on and prove that love does NOT conquer all.
That's the other thing. KStew is cast in a dystopian future where everyone is miserable, and you guys think she'd be BAD at that?
Twilight sucked, but reversed stupidity is not intelligence.
You know what, fuck it.
Bring on 1984: The Musical. It will sweep across Broadway starring Hugh Jackman as Winston and Melanie Griffith as Julia.
You know what? Sign me up.
Fuck your precious notions of how to portray the cruelty of Authority.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 02:43:52 AM
So she gets rats.
I'm okay with this.
:lulz:
I think the guy gets the rats. I don't know what she gets, didn't Orwell leave it unsaid?
The possibilities are ENDLESS. :)
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 03:43:32 AM
You know what? Sign me up.
Fuck your precious notions of how to portray the cruelty of Authority.
This is the motherfucking 21st Century, it's what we do.
Quote from: Tiddleywomp Cockletit on January 16, 2014, 03:48:28 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 02:43:52 AM
So she gets rats.
I'm okay with this.
:lulz:
I think the guy gets the rats. I don't know what she gets, didn't Orwell leave it unsaid?
The possibilities are ENDLESS. :)
Winston was threatened with the rats and it was his breaking point. He told his torturers to do it to HER. It was the first time he betrayed her and it broke him. After that they let him go because he was a broken shell. I don't remember if it says they did it to her, but I do remember Winston's agonizing over the betrayal bit.
Also, I think Keanu Reeves would make a perfect Winston to Kristen Stewart's Julia.
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on January 16, 2014, 07:30:52 AM
Also, I think Keanu Reeves would make a perfect Winston to Kristen Stewart's Julia.
I just hope it turns out to be an unintentional rom-com.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 02:43:52 AM
So she gets rats.
I'm okay with this.
:lulz:
Tell me with a straight face that the ending is not going to be drastically re-written.
1. 1984 isn't a romantic comedy?
2. Kristen Stewart can act. And smile. I have seen both. However, I think she has been given a number of incredibly shit, yet commercially successfully roles in the past. She's not going to pull a Robert Pattinson and whine because, well, money is money, but at the same time, those roles are dumb. Would you put in more than the minumum effort required to get paid?
Professional pride?
Sorry about that noise, nearly swallowed my own tongue.
Yeah, would you evince any professional pride over portraying Bella Swan?
Quote from: Cain on January 16, 2014, 08:59:45 AM
1. 1984 isn't a romantic comedy?
2. Kristen Stewart can act. And smile. I have seen both. However, I think she has been given a number of incredibly shit, yet commercially successfully roles in the past. She's not going to pull a Robert Pattinson and whine because, well, money is money, but at the same time, those roles are dumb. Would you put in more than the minumum effort required to get paid?
THANK YOU. She was really good in
Adventureland, killed it in
The Runaways, and if you want to go way back, she was pretty good in
Panic Room and
The Saftey of Objects.
She got "famous" playing a poorly-written Mary Sue who had the emotional depth of a wood plank. It's not her fault that the script has her stumbling from scene to scene like some mannequin.
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 16, 2014, 09:39:35 AM
Professional pride?
Sorry about that noise, nearly swallowed my own tongue.
Michael "Do It For The Paycheck" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Caine_filmography) Caine.
Quote from: Cain on January 16, 2014, 08:59:45 AM
1. 1984 isn't a romantic comedy?
2. Kristen Stewart can act. And smile. I have seen both. However, I think she has been given a number of incredibly shit, yet commercially successfully roles in the past. She's not going to pull a Robert Pattinson and whine because, well, money is money, but at the same time, those roles are dumb. Would you put in more than the minumum effort required to get paid?
Yes yes yes to 1. It certainly fucking was.
And, yes to 2 as well.
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on January 16, 2014, 07:29:41 AM
Quote from: Tiddleywomp Cockletit on January 16, 2014, 03:48:28 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 02:43:52 AM
So she gets rats.
I'm okay with this.
:lulz:
I think the guy gets the rats. I don't know what she gets, didn't Orwell leave it unsaid?
The possibilities are ENDLESS. :)
Winston was threatened with the rats and it was his breaking point. He told his torturers to do it to HER. It was the first time he betrayed her and it broke him. After that they let him go because he was a broken shell. I don't remember if it says they did it to her, but I do remember Winston's agonizing over the betrayal bit.
Um, they shot him after they broke him.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 12:59:42 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 16, 2014, 09:39:35 AM
Professional pride?
Sorry about that noise, nearly swallowed my own tongue.
Michael "Do It For The Paycheck" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Caine_filmography) Caine.
The Magus is an atrocity that should never have been committed to film. Michael Cain will answer for his crimes one day as well, but that's besides the point.
She was good in Panic room, that was a long time ago, I'd forgotten that was her.
It's really unfair to judge any movie before they even have a script or start production, even if her recent history has been useless lets at least wait until there is a trailer.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 01:43:20 PM
Um, they shot him after they broke him.
Don't they meet again and have nothing left to say between them, it ending on the really depressing "He loved big brother", or did the 1950's movie have a different ending?
Quote from: Faust on January 16, 2014, 01:55:49 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 12:59:42 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 16, 2014, 09:39:35 AM
Professional pride?
Sorry about that noise, nearly swallowed my own tongue.
Michael "Do It For The Paycheck" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Caine_filmography) Caine.
The Magus is an atrocity that should never have been committed to film. Michael Cain will answer for his crimes one day as well, but that's besides the point.
She was good in Panic room, that was a long time ago, I'd forgotten that was her.
It's really unfair to judge any movie before they even have a script or start production, even if her recent history has been useless lets at least wait until there is a trailer.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 01:43:20 PM
Um, they shot him after they broke him.
Don't they meet again and have nothing left to say between them, it ending on the really depressing "He loved big brother", or did the 1950's movie have a different ending?
That's what I remember. I don't remember Winston being shot.
Quote from: Hoopla on January 16, 2014, 02:02:43 PM
Quote from: Faust on January 16, 2014, 01:55:49 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 12:59:42 PM
Quote from: Junkenstein on January 16, 2014, 09:39:35 AM
Professional pride?
Sorry about that noise, nearly swallowed my own tongue.
Michael "Do It For The Paycheck" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Caine_filmography) Caine.
The Magus is an atrocity that should never have been committed to film. Michael Cain will answer for his crimes one day as well, but that's besides the point.
She was good in Panic room, that was a long time ago, I'd forgotten that was her.
It's really unfair to judge any movie before they even have a script or start production, even if her recent history has been useless lets at least wait until there is a trailer.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 01:43:20 PM
Um, they shot him after they broke him.
Don't they meet again and have nothing left to say between them, it ending on the really depressing "He loved big brother", or did the 1950's movie have a different ending?
That's what I remember. I don't remember Winston being shot.
Because he wasn't. I was remembering the dream sequence.
QuoteHe engages in a "blissful dream" in which he offers a full, public confession of his crimes and is executed.
(wikipedia)
Retracted, carry on.
Huh, I always read the end execution as literal.
I'll have to re-read it now.
Quote from: The Suu on January 16, 2014, 03:39:58 AM
You know what, fuck it.
Bring on 1984: The Musical. It will sweep across Broadway starring Hugh Jackman as Winston and Melanie Griffith as Julia.
I'd watch it.
But then I have a weak spot for musicals.
Official Synopsis:
1984 (Film; 2015)
A shy, introverted low-level professional becomes infatuated with an upper-class lady but is unable to gain her attention, until the benevolent Big Brother steps in to help him realize his life's dream of social mobility through looking out for his fellow man.
Quote from: V3X on January 16, 2014, 03:50:12 PM
Official Synopsis:
1984 (Film; 2015)
A shy, introverted low-level professional becomes infatuated with an upper-class lady but is unable to gain her attention, until the benevolent Big Brother steps in to help him realize his life's dream of social mobility through looking out for his fellow man.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
You know what, let the bitch surprise me. Maybe if she has to kiss whats-his-face or something, she may be able to catch some of Jennifer Lawrence's acting skills by proxy.
"The bitch"?
Wow, you feel really strongly about this, don't you?
I started this thread, didn't I?
But to be fair, I refer to a lot of people as, "The Bitch." Be it my mom, my sister, my aunt, college professors, actors I don't like, and occasionally myself. I won't use the C-Word unless they really deserve it.
Quote from: The Suu on January 16, 2014, 04:14:21 PM
I started this thread, didn't I?
But to be fair, I refer to a lot of people as, "The Bitch." Be it my mom, my sister, my aunt, college professors, actors I don't like, and occasionally myself. I won't use the C-Word unless they really deserve it.
And then Suu was Big Daddy Kane.
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 04:18:30 PM
Quote from: The Suu on January 16, 2014, 04:14:21 PM
I started this thread, didn't I?
But to be fair, I refer to a lot of people as, "The Bitch." Be it my mom, my sister, my aunt, college professors, actors I don't like, and occasionally myself. I won't use the C-Word unless they really deserve it.
And then Suu was Big Daddy Kane.
I did it to bring back the hair.
(http://digboston.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/SHAVE-YOUR-STYLE-CHINSTRAP-BIG-DADDY-KANEcrop800x600_a15a7b9b01.jpg)
In other more horrifying Hollywood news, I've just been informed they are remaking The Naked Gun. :crankey:
Sorry to seem pearl-clutching, it just struck me as being oddly hateful and aggressive.
Carry on.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 04:22:26 PM
Sorry to seem pearl-clutching, it just struck me as being oddly hateful and aggressive.
Carry on.
Pimpin' ain't easy.
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 04:22:26 PM
Sorry to seem pearl-clutching, it just struck me as being oddly hateful and aggressive.
Carry on.
Those pearls look very nice with your trilby.
Oh wait, The Naked Gun remake isn't a remake, so they say.
http://metro.co.uk/2014/01/11/frank-drebin-no-relation-the-naked-gun-reboot-with-ed-helms-wont-be-a-remake-but-a-sequel-4258577/
Personally, I refer to Jews as JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOs.
I don't call them filthy disgusting k-words unless they really deserve it.
Why would you want to remake a film that was almost entirely late-80s cultural context gags?
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on January 16, 2014, 04:26:53 PM
Why would you want to remake a film that was almost entirely late-80s cultural context gags?
Because there's a whole new generation that will spend money on going to see it. ~_~
Though really, I think there's some sort of screenwriter shortage. There has to be. I mean, they just re-did Robocop for crying out loud.
No, they're just cheap bastards. Why risk something new, when you can just endlessly recycle products that have already been successfully tested and whose demographic appeal is very well known?
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 01:43:20 PM
Quote from: Cardinal Pizza Deliverance. on January 16, 2014, 07:29:41 AM
Quote from: Tiddleywomp Cockletit on January 16, 2014, 03:48:28 AM
Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on January 16, 2014, 02:43:52 AM
So she gets rats.
I'm okay with this.
:lulz:
I think the guy gets the rats. I don't know what she gets, didn't Orwell leave it unsaid?
The possibilities are ENDLESS. :)
Winston was threatened with the rats and it was his breaking point. He told his torturers to do it to HER. It was the first time he betrayed her and it broke him. After that they let him go because he was a broken shell. I don't remember if it says they did it to her, but I do remember Winston's agonizing over the betrayal bit.
Um, they shot him after they broke him.
Yeah? Okay, sorry. I remember him thinking about the guy who everyone avoids but gets discounted drinks at his local social establishment and him thinking about how they'd come for him a few years down the road if he survived this anyway. I forget the actual ending. Need to reread, apparently!
I still like Brazil more than 1984.
I like Lichtenstein more than 1135.
Wait, we are comparing random countries and years, right?
Quote from: V3X on January 16, 2014, 05:26:20 PM
I still like Brazil more than 1984.
That's because Terry Gilliam is a goddamn genius.
Quote from: Cain on January 16, 2014, 08:59:45 AM
1. 1984 isn't a romantic comedy?
2. Kristen Stewart can act. And smile. I have seen both. However, I think she has been given a number of incredibly shit, yet commercially successfully roles in the past. She's not going to pull a Robert Pattinson and whine because, well, money is money, but at the same time, those roles are dumb. Would you put in more than the minumum effort required to get paid?
Cain wins the thread.
The Runaways was one of the few fairly recent films I bothered checking out, and she actually
was good in that. Most of the stuff coming out these days is crap, for reasons stated in this thread. Also the fact that the american public just wants to see shit blowing up and/or mahdjique, so the SFX tend to carry the movie at the expense of character development, dialogue, etc.
This movie will suck, but not because of her. Because 21st century.