Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Apple Talk => Topic started by: Meunster on March 02, 2015, 11:24:10 PM

Title: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Meunster on March 02, 2015, 11:24:10 PM
My adhd ridden friends won't sit still for more than 30 seconds to understand anything besides QWER and league tier lists.

What's a good quick pitch of it.
I've tried before but they keep saying that it's "le so randum" and only liked by scene girls or 2deep4you type people.

Like how do I make a reasonable pitch, especially with how it is now a relatively unheard of thing.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on March 02, 2015, 11:55:08 PM
Discordia is to Religion as Dada is to Art.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Doktor Howl on March 03, 2015, 12:57:27 AM
Quote from: Meunster on March 02, 2015, 11:24:10 PM
My adhd ridden friends won't sit still for more than 30 seconds to understand anything besides QWER and league tier lists.

What's a good quick pitch of it.
I've tried before but they keep saying that it's "le so randum" and only liked by scene girls or 2deep4you type people.

Like how do I make a reasonable pitch, especially with how it is now a relatively unheard of thing.

*shrug*  Ask a Mormon.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Pæs on March 03, 2015, 12:59:26 AM
If you ever have to pitch Discordianism in an elevator, push all the buttons and exclaim loudly "DISCORDIANS ARE KIND OF DICKS" then remain silent until you reach your floor.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Doktor Howl on March 03, 2015, 01:42:59 AM
Quote from: Pæs on March 03, 2015, 12:59:26 AM
If you ever have to pitch Discordianism in an elevator, push all the buttons and exclaim loudly "DISCORDIANS ARE KIND OF DICKS" then remain silent until you reach your floor.

...While glaring at the person like THEY did something wrong.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Meunster on March 03, 2015, 02:03:36 AM
Quote from: Pæs on March 03, 2015, 12:59:26 AM
If you ever have to pitch Discordianism in an elevator, push all the buttons and exclaim loudly "DISCORDIANS ARE KIND OF DICKS" then remain silent until you reach your floor.

Next time I'm in an elevator I'll do that. Actually, I'm heading to the local hotel now.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Eater of Clowns on March 03, 2015, 02:39:50 AM
Discordianism is a lot like this elevator. It opens up to a variety of places but you probably don't go there because you get off on the same floor every day. And like the elevator it's filled with assholes.

Then you press every button.

Every ding is enlightenment. They still won't get off on a different floor.

You really should be taking the stairs anyway.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: LMNO on March 03, 2015, 12:05:38 PM
:notnice:
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: rong on March 03, 2015, 02:46:15 PM
it is simultaneously a joke disguised as a religion and a religion disguised as a joke
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: LMNO on March 03, 2015, 02:47:12 PM
I've always been fond of ECH's line.

"Militant Agnosticism."
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on March 03, 2015, 02:47:45 PM
Hold up a gold painted pinapple grenade as soon as the doors close and you're moving. "You got 5 seconds to make peace with the cosmos pal."

Pull pin and drop. Grin like a ninny at the elevator ceiling and put your hands out like you're receiving the Spirit of God. Let them panic until the door opens. Pick up grenade and casually walk out like nothing happened.
Argue religious rights to the court during the inevitable hearing.
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on March 03, 2015, 02:48:10 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on March 03, 2015, 02:47:12 PM
I've always been fond of ECH's line.

"Militant Agnosticism."

THIS!
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞ on March 03, 2015, 06:36:55 PM
Quote from: Meunster on March 02, 2015, 11:24:10 PM
My adhd ridden friends won't sit still for more than 30 seconds to understand anything besides QWER and league tier lists.

What's a good quick pitch of it.
I've tried before but they keep saying that it's "le so randum" and only liked by scene girls or 2deep4you type people.

Like how do I make a reasonable pitch, especially with how it is now a relatively unheard of thing.

I wouldn't fuck my friends with your dick, so why do you want to fuck yours with mine?
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Meunster on March 03, 2015, 06:42:49 PM
Quote from: N E T on March 03, 2015, 06:36:55 PM
Quote from: Meunster on March 02, 2015, 11:24:10 PM
My adhd ridden friends won't sit still for more than 30 seconds to understand anything besides QWER and league tier lists.

What's a good quick pitch of it.
I've tried before but they keep saying that it's "le so randum" and only liked by scene girls or 2deep4you type people.

Like how do I make a reasonable pitch, especially with how it is now a relatively unheard of thing.

I wouldn't fuck my friends with your dick, so why do you want to fuck yours with mine?

Cause everyone should try it and not just dismiss it as needlessly random so not worth the time. 

Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Pæs on March 03, 2015, 06:53:21 PM
Use clickbait headlines. Everyone loves clickbait headlines.

Pagans hate him! Learn this one weird trick to SCREAMING HYSTERICAL NOTHINGNESS.

Seven PM responses to read before you die. Number five will shock you!
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: Demolition Squid on March 03, 2015, 06:57:04 PM
Quote from: Pæs on March 03, 2015, 06:53:21 PM
Use clickbait headlines. Everyone loves clickbait headlines.

Pagans hate him! Learn this one weird trick to SCREAMING HYSTERICAL NOTHINGNESS.

Seven PM responses to read before you die. Number five will shock you!

I love this.

The Weird Apple-Based Diet Nutritionists HATE!
Title: Re: How to elevator pitch discordianism?
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on March 03, 2015, 09:33:36 PM
Quote from: Demolition Squid on March 03, 2015, 06:57:04 PM
Quote from: Pæs on March 03, 2015, 06:53:21 PM
Use clickbait headlines. Everyone loves clickbait headlines.

Pagans hate him! Learn this one weird trick to SCREAMING HYSTERICAL NOTHINGNESS.

Seven PM responses to read before you die. Number five will shock you!

I love this.

The Weird Apple-Based Diet Nutritionists HATE!

Not actually a link!!   :argh!:  :argh!: