Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Two vast and trunkless legs of stone => Topic started by: Cain on March 01, 2016, 01:27:46 AM

Title: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Cain on March 01, 2016, 01:27:46 AM
http://www.madcowprod.com/2016/02/22/dripping-blood-a-severed-arm-67-tons-of-cash-on-a-cia-plane/

QuoteWhen the ground crew at Harare International Airport comes out to refuel the plane, they're horrified to see blood dripping down the fuselage. The plane's crew dismisses it. Its led by two Americans, who claim they hit a bird earlier. Somebody calls the cops.

"The ground crew refueling the plane alerted local authorities," the Zimbabwe Herald reported. "Drops of blood were coming from a door, and state security officials stationed at the airport insisted it be opened."

They make the pilot climb up the fuselage, and open the door leaking blood. What he finds: an adult male. No bird. No feathers.

"For some reason the pilot first put on latex gloves, and then opened the door,  which is quite high up the aircraft," an aviation insider told the Zimbabwe Herald. "And thwack, a fully clothed body of a black man fell out."

"Thwack?" Okay. But the body only falls half-out, and for the next several hours the partially-severed arm of a dead man drips blood down the fuselage which wells into a puddle on the tarmac while things sort themselves out.

The crew probably now realize that they face a bit of a sticky wicket. A dead body onboard. Cause of death unknown. Name unknown. Nationality unknown.
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on March 01, 2016, 01:54:56 AM
What the actual shit?
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Pæs on March 01, 2016, 02:41:02 AM
Does this make it more or less suspicious?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/feb/20/zimbabwe-us-registered-plane-body-suspected-stowaway
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Sung Low on March 01, 2016, 03:02:50 AM
If they give no fucks about the CIA, +1 to Zimbabwe?
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Faust on March 01, 2016, 11:18:24 AM
Rendition flight?
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Freeky on March 01, 2016, 11:27:08 PM
Quote from: Pæs on March 01, 2016, 02:41:02 AM
Does this make it more or less suspicious?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/feb/20/zimbabwe-us-registered-plane-body-suspected-stowaway

More, because "a pathologist found no injuries internal or external on the body."

So where did all that blood come from, and when did "partially severed arm" start not being an injury?
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Cain on March 02, 2016, 01:12:49 AM
Quote from: Pæs on March 01, 2016, 02:41:02 AM
Does this make it more or less suspicious?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/feb/20/zimbabwe-us-registered-plane-body-suspected-stowaway

Less, but it's still pretty weird, with all the currency.
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Pæs on March 02, 2016, 01:38:11 AM
Quote from: Choppas an' Sluggas on March 01, 2016, 11:27:08 PM
Quote from: Pæs on March 01, 2016, 02:41:02 AM
Does this make it more or less suspicious?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/feb/20/zimbabwe-us-registered-plane-body-suspected-stowaway

More, because "a pathologist found no injuries internal or external on the body."

So where did all that blood come from, and when did "partially severed arm" start not being an injury?
That was what got me, too.
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Pæs on March 02, 2016, 01:38:38 AM
EVERYTHING IS FINE, 'IS ARM FELL OFF WITHOUT INJURING HIM EVEN A LITTLE. NATURAL CAUSES.
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: Junkenstein on March 02, 2016, 01:55:31 PM
....So what explains the cash and what happened to it?

I'm guessing it strangely went missing while all attention is on the guy and dripping blood.
Title: Re: Here's your weirdness for the day, you degenerates
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on March 02, 2016, 04:55:15 PM
Quote from: Pæs on March 02, 2016, 01:38:11 AM
Quote from: Choppas an' Sluggas on March 01, 2016, 11:27:08 PM
Quote from: Pæs on March 01, 2016, 02:41:02 AM
Does this make it more or less suspicious?

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/feb/20/zimbabwe-us-registered-plane-body-suspected-stowaway

More, because "a pathologist found no injuries internal or external on the body."

So where did all that blood come from, and when did "partially severed arm" start not being an injury?
That was what got me, too.

Arm damage might have been determined to be post-mortem. Sounds like some desperate genius thought they could stow away there. Probably died of exposure and the body got ripped when the gear deployed.

Just guessing of course.