The news is stressing me out these days - so I'm going to completely unplug it, and only get my news from this thread.
Please let me know if anything important happens in the world. I will believe anything you post and will not do any fact checking.
Thanks,
Cramulus
We, as a nation, just shot Marvin in the face.
That one sentence is all you actually need to know about every single news story currently on the AP site.
Things fell apart, and no one did much of anything.
Nobody did anything? I thought we just shot Marvin. That seems like progress. I think we should accidentally shoot him again.
I didn't see anything in the OP insisting on trivialities like "consistency".
Quote from: Cramulus on January 21, 2020, 07:18:40 PM
Nobody did anything? I thought we just shot Marvin. That seems like progress. I think we should accidentally shoot him again.
Marvin is a platonic ideal. He is being shot in the face at any point in time in which he is observed.
(https://media.giphy.com/media/o4V1rlXko1Sow/giphy.gif)
basically, imagine time as a solid object
Quote from: LMNO on January 21, 2020, 07:35:14 PM
(https://media.giphy.com/media/o4V1rlXko1Sow/giphy.gif)
This is how progress occurs: Through acts of massive incompetence.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on January 21, 2020, 08:44:41 PM
Quote from: LMNO on January 21, 2020, 07:35:14 PM
(https://media.giphy.com/media/o4V1rlXko1Sow/giphy.gif)
This is how progress occurs: Through acts of massive incompetence.
By this logic, Trump should be the best thing that ever happened to America. His intentions are evil and he never does anything right. He *should* be fucking up his fascist agenda so bad that he accidentally erases student loan debt and creates a single payer health system.
Quote from: tyrannosaurus vex on January 21, 2020, 08:09:24 PM
basically, imagine time as a solid object
like a cube
a cube with 4 simultaneous days within every 24 hour rotation
also,
Marvin should have been wearing the God Helmet
People are still angry at The Good Reverend Roger, about everything.
Quote from: Cain on January 21, 2020, 09:14:08 PM
People are still angry at The Good Reverend Roger, about everything.
He loved
too much.
Quote from: tyrannosaurus vex on January 21, 2020, 09:08:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on January 21, 2020, 08:44:41 PM
Quote from: LMNO on January 21, 2020, 07:35:14 PM
(https://media.giphy.com/media/o4V1rlXko1Sow/giphy.gif)
This is how progress occurs: Through acts of massive incompetence.
By this logic, Trump should be the best thing that ever happened to America. His intentions are evil and he never does anything right. He *should* be fucking up his fascist agenda so bad that he accidentally erases student loan debt and creates a single payer health system.
You took that to mean "progressive". I said it to mean "how events move along."
Quote from: tyrannosaurus vex on January 21, 2020, 09:08:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on January 21, 2020, 08:44:41 PM
Quote from: LMNO on January 21, 2020, 07:35:14 PM
(https://media.giphy.com/media/o4V1rlXko1Sow/giphy.gif)
This is how progress occurs: Through acts of massive incompetence.
By this logic, Trump should be the best thing that ever happened to America. His intentions are evil and he never does anything right. He *should* be fucking up his fascist agenda so bad that he accidentally erases student loan debt and creates a single payer health system.
If we get a canny leftist as president he paved the way for that by taking military money away to build his wall. The supreme court ruled it was ok to spend military money on an emergency. Our next president could declare student loan debt and folks being uninsured as emergencies.
Quote from: Pergamos on January 21, 2020, 11:27:40 PM
Quote from: tyrannosaurus vex on January 21, 2020, 09:08:20 PM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on January 21, 2020, 08:44:41 PM
Quote from: LMNO on January 21, 2020, 07:35:14 PM
(https://media.giphy.com/media/o4V1rlXko1Sow/giphy.gif)
This is how progress occurs: Through acts of massive incompetence.
By this logic, Trump should be the best thing that ever happened to America. His intentions are evil and he never does anything right. He *should* be fucking up his fascist agenda so bad that he accidentally erases student loan debt and creates a single payer health system.
If we get a canny leftist as president he paved the way for that by taking military money away to build his wall. The supreme court ruled it was ok to spend military money on an emergency. Our next president could declare student loan debt and folks being uninsured as emergencies.
I approve of this sort of self-amplifying pendulum effect.
World war 3 Happened, but in the world of proxy nations fighting wars for the superpowers it was entirely fought in EVE online.
Ukrainian hackers won, and everyone but Norway have had to go to the IMF for a bailout.
Our reptilian overlords have come forward to say they fucked up, and are restarting the simulation to 2012
YAY!?!?
Disregard all preceding and following messages in this thread. They were/will be posted in error. This post alone contains the truth of the current situation.
There is no news to report. All is well.
Quote from: chaotic neutral observer on January 22, 2020, 01:22:16 AM
Disregard all preceding and following messages in this thread. They were/will be posted in error. This post alone contains the truth of the current situation.
There is no news to report. All is well.
This post tells only lies.
Quote from: The Wizard Joseph on January 22, 2020, 03:48:15 AM
Quote from: chaotic neutral observer on January 22, 2020, 01:22:16 AM
Disregard all preceding and following messages in this thread. They were/will be posted in error. This post alone contains the truth of the current situation.
There is no news to report. All is well.
This post tells only lies.
it's true
Cram, you missed so much: here's the best two highlights.
As of last week, sports is outlawed by the European Union, and porn is the new international pastime publicly, not just privately. Unfortunate implications from this change led to the declaration of France as a mistake in the timeline, now rectified. Old France is expected to complete its fly-by of Neptune in May, and New France is a pit of horror that is currently having the world's biggest tarp draped over it so we don't have to see it while the paradox works itself out.
Also, Eris returned from wherever she was with a filthy litter box and broke into your apartment with it. She then dumped it all over your stovetop, turned your microwave upside down, and mixed your ketchup and maple syrup bottles into your household cleaning supplies. No explanation was provided.
This just in.
We interrupt this news report to bring you a special news report.
Please stand by. As we gather more information we will update this story.
This is a developing story. Events may unfold that change as they happen.
Our regularly scheduled news program will commence following this report.
Our reporters are standing by at the scene.
Please forgive our appearance as we undergo remodeling.
Your same favorite news will soon be available at a new news location at 451 Short St. Columbus OH.
For trusted reporting you can trust and rely on, turn to your favorite news station. Every day.
Sources at the scene describe the events.
We're sorry for this.
Quote from: altered on January 22, 2020, 08:57:43 AM
Cram, you missed so much: here's the best two highlights.
As of last week, sports is outlawed by the European Union, and porn is the new international pastime publicly, not just privately. Unfortunate implications from this change led to the declaration of France as a mistake in the timeline, now rectified. Old France is expected to complete its fly-by of Neptune in May, and New France is a pit of horror that is currently having the world's biggest tarp draped over it so we don't have to see it while the paradox works itself out.
:lulz: :lulz: :lulz:
That explains
a lot, actually.
QuoteAlso, Eris returned from wherever she was with a filthy litter box and broke into your apartment with it. She then dumped it all over your stovetop, turned your microwave upside down, and mixed your ketchup and maple syrup bottles into your household cleaning supplies. No explanation was provided.
This is weirdly plausible.
Quote from: Cramulus on January 21, 2020, 09:09:39 PM
Marvin should have been wearing the God Helmet
This part of the post was under-appreciated.
Mexico is still not where it belongs.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on January 22, 2020, 11:42:15 AM
This just in.
We interrupt this news report to bring you a special news report.
Please stand by. As we gather more information we will update this story.
This is a developing story. Events may unfold that change as they happen.
Our regularly scheduled news program will commence following this report.
Our reporters are standing by at the scene.
Please forgive our appearance as we undergo remodeling.
Your same favorite news will soon be available at a new news location at 451 Short St. Columbus OH.
For trusted reporting you can trust and rely on, turn to your favorite news station. Every day.
Sources at the scene describe the events.
We're sorry for this.
:lulz:
(https://pics.me.me/its-just-silence-but-it-keeps-getting-faster-oh-god-29651373.png)