Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Literate Chaotic => Topic started by: Wishfarple on June 08, 2005, 03:12:01 AM

Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 08, 2005, 03:12:01 AM
Jimmy Carter shrunk and dropped in that terrarrium Ricardo Montalban pulled the devil ear-worms out of in Wrath of Khan.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Rev. St. Syn, KSC (Ret.) on June 08, 2005, 11:11:18 AM
Khan pwns Carter
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 08, 2005, 12:06:21 PM
18 acorns wrapped in silk and carefully placed on the eyelids of each sleeping Supreme Court Justice.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Rev. St. Syn, KSC (Ret.) on June 08, 2005, 12:26:26 PM
Fnord generator is a cool toy.
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: East Coast Hustle on June 08, 2005, 02:40:33 PM
Quote from: Wizzle Fo ShizzleJimmy Carter shrunk and dropped in that terrarrium Ricardo Montalban pulled the devil ear-worms out of in Wrath of Khan.
YOU!!!!

8)
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 09, 2005, 01:22:59 AM
Bartles and James taking turns comfortably banging the neck-hole of a tracheotomy patient.
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 02:42:05 AM
Quote from: Wizzle Fo ShizzleJimmy Carter shrunk and dropped in that terrarrium Ricardo Montalban pulled the devil ear-worms out of in Wrath of Khan.

What's wrong with Jimmy Carter?  He's a really nice guy, and possibly the ONLY non-corrupt prez of the twentieth century.
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 09, 2005, 02:57:16 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
What's wrong with Jimmy Carter?  He's a really nice guy, and possibly the ONLY non-corrupt prez of the twentieth century.

That is possible, Rog.  Seems more likely to me that he didn't stick around long enough to get caught doing anything unseemly.  I'm convinced down to the marrow of my bones that a person does not get elected to national office without being a sociopath.

That said, the only real reason I picked Jimmy Carter for the terrarium is I figure he's probably in the best shape out of the former Presidents still living.  I want to get my money's worth out of the Terrorarium, after all.
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 02:59:22 AM
Quote from: Wizzle Fo Shizzle
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
What's wrong with Jimmy Carter?  He's a really nice guy, and possibly the ONLY non-corrupt prez of the twentieth century.

That is possible, Rog.  Seems more likely to me that he didn't stick around long enough to get caught doing anything unseemly.  I'm convinced down to the marrow of my bones that a person does not get elected to national office without being a sociopath.

That said, the only real reason I picked Jimmy Carter for the terrarium is I figure he's probably in the best shape out of the former Presidents still living.  I want to get my money's worth out of the Terrorarium, after all.

I remember the Carter presidency.

He was - believe it or not - clean as a whistle.  Plenty of one-termers got caught doing crazy shit (Warren G Harding, LBJ, etc).  Not Jimmy, though.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 09, 2005, 03:04:51 AM
He does seem to have his head on straight. (http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050607/ap_on_re_us/carter_guantanamo_1)

Gotta admire a guy who can in the same breath say Gitmo oughtta be shut down but that it ain't a freakin gulag.  Sensationalism is rampant on all sides, glad to see people fighting against it.
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: East Coast Hustle on June 09, 2005, 03:38:41 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
What's wrong with Jimmy Carter?  He's a really nice guy, and possibly the ONLY non-corrupt prez of the twentieth century.

that's a lie and you know it.

he was a sinner.



he had lust in his heart.

8)
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy on June 09, 2005, 03:49:13 AM
I, too remember the Carter years.  His biggest problem was lack of promotion.  He did a lot of good things for the environment and for the national park system.  Plus, he has done more good deeds after leaving office.

And HabernoPants stole what I was gonna say about lust in his heart, hehehe :twisted:
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 06:18:16 AM
Quote from: Tomorrow Comes Today
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
What's wrong with Jimmy Carter?  He's a really nice guy, and possibly the ONLY non-corrupt prez of the twentieth century.

that's a lie and you know it.

he was a sinner.



he had lust in his heart.

8)

Yeah,  but I have lust in my PANCE!

So, I really can't go around point fingers at the small stuff.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy on June 09, 2005, 06:27:24 AM
But at least he didn't have lust in the oval office with an intern :lol:
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 06:28:37 AM
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of AlchemyBut at least he didn't have lust in the oval office with an intern :lol:

Yes, that was a shortcoming.

But other than that, he was an OK guy.

TGRR,
Thinks Carter shoulda gone for it.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy on June 09, 2005, 06:37:26 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of AlchemyBut at least he didn't have lust in the oval office with an intern :lol:

Yes, that was a shortcoming.

But other than that, he was an OK guy.

TGRR,
Thinks Carter shoulda gone for it.
Maybe he didn't have any interns as sexy as Monica :shock:  :lol:
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Irreverend Hugh, KSC on June 09, 2005, 06:38:41 AM
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of AlchemyBut at least he didn't have lust in the oval office with an intern :lol:

Yes, that was a shortcoming.

But other than that, he was an OK guy.

TGRR,
Thinks Carter shoulda gone for it.
Maybe he didn't have any interns as sexy as Monica :shock:  :lol:

He totally did.

I just think he was a little bit too under the table to get caught.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 06:39:28 AM
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of AlchemyBut at least he didn't have lust in the oval office with an intern :lol:

Yes, that was a shortcoming.

But other than that, he was an OK guy.

TGRR,
Thinks Carter shoulda gone for it.
Maybe he didn't have any interns as sexy as Monica :shock:  :lol:

*ahem*

UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy on June 09, 2005, 06:44:29 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of AlchemyBut at least he didn't have lust in the oval office with an intern :lol:

Yes, that was a shortcoming.

But other than that, he was an OK guy.

TGRR,
Thinks Carter shoulda gone for it.
Maybe he didn't have any interns as sexy as Monica :shock:  :lol:

*ahem*

UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!

What :lol:
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 06:52:30 AM
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of AlchemyBut at least he didn't have lust in the oval office with an intern :lol:

Yes, that was a shortcoming.

But other than that, he was an OK guy.

TGRR,
Thinks Carter shoulda gone for it.
Maybe he didn't have any interns as sexy as Monica :shock:  :lol:

*ahem*

UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!

What :lol:

UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Guido Finucci on June 09, 2005, 07:36:02 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger
Quote from: Eldora, Oracle of Alchemy
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger

*ahem*

UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!

What :lol:

UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!

Huh. Huh. Uh-huh-huh-huh. Huh. He said, "unnng". Yeah. Unnng. Unnnnng. UNNNNNNNG! BOIOIOIOIOIOINNNNG!
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Irreverend Hugh, KSC on June 09, 2005, 07:58:07 AM
Glad to see that Guido understands the gist of what was said.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: agent compassion on June 09, 2005, 04:45:58 PM
Honestly, I think that all Presidents get a little a la carte, it's one of the perks of the job, that ugly old dudes can score with chicks who wouldn't give 'em the time of day otherwise.

Like so:

Ugly dude + modestly hot girl = Sexual harassment lawsuit
Ugly dude + supreme executive power + modestly hot girl = Freaky oval office sex

8)
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 07:16:10 PM
Quote from: FnordiscordiaTo set the record straight:

Monica Lewinsky was a fug-fest.

*profuse vomit*

*misuse of grammar*

JFK had Marilyn Monroe..

Clinton had a fat homely woman...

What has this great presidency come to?????

(I use the term "great" and "to" liberally)(( I also use parentheses liberally)

She wasn't that ugly.

And Gennifer Flowers was teh HAWT.

But you are correct.  She was a definite step down from Norma Jean Baker.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: East Coast Hustle on June 09, 2005, 07:37:36 PM
Gennifer Flowers wasn't all that hot.

I saw her Penthouse pictorial.

unimpressive, and HEAVILY airbrushed.

in fact, Paula Jones' pictorial was better.

she was almost kinda hot after her nose job.



8)
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 07:40:13 PM
Quote from: Tomorrow Comes TodayGennifer Flowers wasn't all that hot.

I saw her Penthouse pictorial.

unimpressive, and HEAVILY airbrushed.

in fact, Paula Jones' pictorial was better.

she was almost kinda hot after her nose job.



8)

1.  You should have seen pics of Gennifer Flowers at the time of the alledged events.

2.  Paula Jones? :lol:  She got robbed.  They didn't take NEARLY enough off.  That woman still gets anoxia every time she tilts her head back.  She IS, however, still the biggest bitch EVAR, and the worst "friend" EVAR.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: East Coast Hustle on June 09, 2005, 07:41:36 PM
you think she's a worse "friend" than Linda Tripp?

8)
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 07:42:06 PM
Quote from: Tomorrow Comes Todayyou think she's a worse "friend" than Linda Tripp?

8)

Both of them.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: East Coast Hustle on June 09, 2005, 07:43:19 PM
that response only makes sense if it was a fat joke.

and if it was...

ZANG!!!!

:lol:
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on June 09, 2005, 07:45:17 PM
Quote from: Tomorrow Comes Todaythat response only makes sense if it was a fat joke.

and if it was...

ZANG!!!!

:lol:

(http://bbs.fuckedcompany.com/icons/thankyouthankyou.gif)




(it was actually a joke about nose size, but fat will do)
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 12, 2005, 08:17:20 PM
Enormous, mutant bat develops sentience and pursues a career as a celebrated TV anchorman.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 14, 2005, 01:07:10 AM
Ron Jeremy's disembodied member walks the earth, fighting injustice wherever it arises.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: AFK on June 15, 2005, 02:27:40 PM
Celebrity Survivor.

We've stranded a bunch of celebrities on this uncharted island.  We've taken their cell-phones, their agents, and their cocaine.  All they have is the shirt on their back.  "For Christ's sake Paris put your shirt back on!"

Sorry.  

So here are some of the celebrities you'll see this season.  First the annoying teeny-diva tribe.  Ms. Hilton, Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Avril Lavigne, Madonna (hey you gotta have a couple old timers on Survivor), Jennifer Lopez, and the Aflac Duck.

On the other side of the island we have the freaks-of-nature tribe.  Michael Jackson, Richard Simmons, Liza Manelli, the runaway bride, Donny Osmond, and the re-animated corpse of Telly Savalas.

Here's the twist.  I, your host, Rev. What's-His-Name? and my trusty friend here Mr. Shotgun will be hunting you down one by one after you scatter about this here island.  The last one standing wins the game.  The prize?  A ten second head start swim off the island.  Now, where did I put my harpoon.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: G to the T to the L on June 15, 2005, 02:36:40 PM
Quote from: Rev. What's-His-Name?Celebrity Survivor.

We've stranded a bunch of celebrities on this uncharted island.  We've taken their cell-phones, their agents, and their cocaine.  All they have is the shirt on their back.  "For Christ's sake Paris put your shirt back on!"

Sorry.  

So here are some of the celebrities you'll see this season.  First the annoying teeny-diva tribe.  Ms. Hilton, Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Avril Lavigne, Madonna (hey you gotta have a couple old timers on Survivor), Jennifer Lopez, and the PLEASE DO NOT GIVE AWAY OUR SECRETS.

On the other side of the island we have the freaks-of-nature tribe.  Michael Jackson, Richard Simmons, Liza Manelli, the runaway bride, Donny Osmond, and the re-animated corpse of Telly Savalas.

Here's the twist.  I, your host, Rev. What's-His-Name? and my trusty friend here Mr. Shotgun will be hunting you down one by one after you scatter about this here island.  The last one standing wins the game.  The prize?  A ten second head start swim off the island.  Now, where did I put my harpoon.

Careful, Rev.  You let that one slip.
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Zurtok Khan on June 16, 2005, 09:16:41 AM
Quote from: Reverend of DeathCelebrity Survivor.

We've stranded a bunch of celebrities on this uncharted island.  We've taken their cell-phones, their agents, and their cocaine.  All they have is the shirt on their back.  "For Christ's sake Paris put your shirt back on!"

Sorry.  

So here are some of the celebrities you'll see this season.  First the annoying teeny-diva tribe.  Ms. Hilton, Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Avril Lavigne, Madonna (hey you gotta have a couple old timers on Survivor), Jennifer Lopez, and the Aflac Duck.

On the other side of the island we have the freaks-of-nature tribe.  Michael Jackson, Richard Simmons, Liza Manelli, the runaway bride, Donny Osmond, and the re-animated corpse of Telly Savalas.

Here's the twist.  I, your host, Rev. What's-His-Name? and my trusty friend here Mr. Shotgun will be hunting you down one by one after you scatter about this here island.  The last one standing wins the game.  The prize?  A ten second head start swim off the island.  Now, where did I put my harpoon.

OMG, thats simply beautiful.  That's about the only reality TV I'd ever watch.  Well, besides porn that is  :twisted:
Title: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on June 17, 2005, 01:01:46 AM
Wishfarple dies and gets to spend the rest of eternity scaring the everloving fuck out of obnoxious fat children.
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Wishfarple on April 24, 2010, 08:09:45 PM
Quote from: Wishfarple on June 17, 2005, 01:01:46 AM
Wishfarple dies and gets to spend the rest of eternity scaring the everloving fuck out of obnoxious fat children.

this never happened but i did manage to sneak up on a squirrel and give it a really good start
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 25, 2010, 06:22:22 AM
Fucking what
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 25, 2010, 06:23:04 AM
How much of this gets to go on before I am allowed to stop being un-cranky?
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Doktor Howl on April 25, 2010, 06:32:56 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on April 25, 2010, 06:23:04 AM
How much of this gets to go on before I am allowed to stop being un-cranky?

It's your thing, woman.  Do whatcha wanna do.
Title: Re: Thing I really want to see happen
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on April 25, 2010, 06:34:40 AM
Quote from: Doktor Howl on April 25, 2010, 06:32:56 AM
Quote from: The Lord and Lady Omnibus Fuck on April 25, 2010, 06:23:04 AM
How much of this gets to go on before I am allowed to stop being un-cranky?

It's your thing, woman.  Do whatcha wanna do.

:)