Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Literate Chaotic => Topic started by: Mangrove on December 06, 2005, 09:10:08 PM

Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Mangrove on December 06, 2005, 09:10:08 PM
Dear America,


No, in fact, this letter is to one American in particular. That's right, I'm talking to YUO Mr J Rodriguez of Connecticut.

Lemme get this straight. You were:

Awaiting a court appearance on a number of minor felonies and what did you do? That's right, you called the court house with a BOMB THREAT and now you are convicted of Terrorism(tm) because you thought that would get you out of a trial. Like...Duh......

HAVE YOU NOT SEEN ANY NEWSPAPERS, TV OR INTERNET SINCE SEPT 2001?

Try cracking a book moran.

Yours kabbalistically,


Mangrove
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Bella on December 06, 2005, 09:13:19 PM
Welcome to Amurrica, Mang. Kind of a rude awakening, isn't it?

And yes, the entire country is full of idiots of the same caliber as Mr. J Rodriguez of Connecticut.
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Mangrove on December 06, 2005, 09:17:04 PM
Quote from: She Who Lurks Beyond, Oracle of DoomWelcome to Amurrica, Mang. Kind of a rude awakening, isn't it?

And yes, the entire country is full of idiots of the same caliber as Mr. J Rodriguez of Connecticut.

Thanks Bella. I'm learning all sorts of cool stuff:

ie: How to say "Chipotle" like they do on the commericals. Chi-POTE-lay!

The fun never ends!

:D
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: hooplala on December 06, 2005, 09:25:40 PM
Did the moron call from home??

Doesn't the sonnuvabitch know you makes those kinds of calls from phonebooths?
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Bella on December 06, 2005, 09:27:46 PM
He probably called from his cell phone in the courthouse lobby.  :lol:
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: hooplala on December 06, 2005, 09:37:10 PM
:lol:
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Cain on December 06, 2005, 11:27:33 PM
Quote from: Pope T.Mangrove xvii
Quote from: She Who Lurks Beyond, Oracle of DoomWelcome to Amurrica, Mang. Kind of a rude awakening, isn't it?

And yes, the entire country is full of idiots of the same caliber as Mr. J Rodriguez of Connecticut.

Thanks She Who Eats Souls. I'm learning all sorts of cool stuff:

ie: How to say "Chipotle" like they do on the commericals. Chi-POTE-lay!

The fun never ends!

:D

Barabarian heathens!  The Empire should be restarted, for this exact reason.  Eventually, we will, after buring down the White House again, corner this man with an Army and force him to say it properly.
Title: Re: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 07, 2005, 12:28:42 AM
Quote from: Pope T.Mangrove xviiDear America,


No, in fact, this letter is to one American in particular. That's right, I'm talking to YUO Mr J Rodriguez of Connecticut.

Lemme get this straight. You were:

Awaiting a court appearance on a number of minor felonies and what did you do? That's right, you called the court house with a BOMB THREAT and now you are convicted of Terrorism(tm) because you thought that would get you out of a trial. Like...Duh......

HAVE YOU NOT SEEN ANY NEWSPAPERS, TV OR gloryhole SINCE SEPT 2001?

Try cracking a book moran.

Yours kabbalistically,


Mangrove

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

TGRR,
Thinks this is FUNNIER, for being typical.
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: agent compassion on December 07, 2005, 05:28:19 AM
::waves to Mang::

::wanders off to the Open Bar::

Oh good, scrid's asleep... ::drinks all the vodka and passes out on teh cash register.::
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Shibboleet The Annihilator on December 07, 2005, 09:57:53 AM
*shoves AC down the stairs*

I love Amurrica.
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: hooplala on December 07, 2005, 01:11:52 PM
*opens a trap door at bottom of stairs which leads to sub-basement*

And I loves the innernets.
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: agent compassion on December 07, 2005, 06:10:49 PM
*rummages in basement and finds doomsday weapon*

And I love unmarked boxes in dank basements *detonates*

:twisted:
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Cain on December 07, 2005, 06:33:42 PM
Sorry, that Doomsday weapons had a 1989 expirary date.
Title: Re: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Irreverend Hugh, KSC on December 07, 2005, 10:26:55 PM
Quote from: Pope T.Mangrove xviiDear America,


No, in fact, this letter is to one American in particular. That's right, I'm talking to YUO Mr J Rodriguez of Connecticut.

Lemme get this straight. You were:

Awaiting a court appearance on a number of minor felonies and what did you do? That's right, you called the court house with a BOMB THREAT and now you are convicted of Terrorism(tm) because you thought that would get you out of a trial. Like...Duh......

HAVE YOU NOT SEEN ANY NEWSPAPERS, TV OR gloryhole SINCE SEPT 2001?

Try cracking a book moran.

Yours kabbalistically,


Mangrove

This message is approved for abuse in schools!
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: agent compassion on December 08, 2005, 01:43:37 AM
Quote from: CainSorry, that Doomsday weapons had a 1989 expirary date.

That's fine, I wasn't ready to leap into the air and scatter myself over a large area anyway.

8)
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Shibboleet The Annihilator on December 08, 2005, 02:40:54 AM
Coward.
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Mangrove on December 08, 2005, 06:30:47 PM
I think our good buddy Mr J Rodriguez had a friend whose schtick was to run off an airplane saying "I've got a bomb!".


I didn't think I'd have to do this again so soon....

"Dear America,

Well...not all of America, just the guy who said 'I've got a bomb' yesterday in Miami. Saying you've got a bomb is a Federal offense...in fact, it has been for quite some time.

The difference is that in the past they woulda slapped the cuffs on you , threw you into a cell and called you a dumbass. However, nowadays they cut out all that interim paperwork and just fucking shoot you 'k?

So, to review just in case you've missed all media sources in the last year. Things you don't do:

a) Threaten bombings in order to get out of minor offences.
b) Threaten bombings when you're trying to get off a plane.

It's really not that hard.

Now please return to eating all those lovely Chipotle products.

Mangrove.


PS Having a bomb, threatening people with one and resisting arrest aren't not technically necessary, especially if you're trying to catch a train in London.
Title: Mangrove's Letter To America #1
Post by: Cain on December 08, 2005, 06:38:23 PM
They reckon he was mentally ill or something, which almost seems obvious with hindsight.