Two young men approach a dilapidated house somewhat nervously. They ring the bell and stand around adjusting their dark suits. Finally, a scruffy individual opens the door.
Them: Hello, I'm Elder Genericsen and this is Elder Thatguyson. We're representing th--
Us: I know. I've been waiting for you, I have a question to ask. Won't you come inside?
The two men enter the house with some trepidation, but are relieved that someone finally wants to talk to them. The interior is surprisingly pleasant, and they settle down on a comfy couch.
Us: I have a question about the nature of God. Do you think you can answer that?
Them: Well, certainly.
Us: Okay. Well first, you guys don't hold truck with magic, right?
Them: We think it's a dark path to travel.
Us: Okay, don't elaborate.
Us: So you guys follow the whole Judeo-Christian mythos of God being a giant beard in the sky, omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent right?
Them: Well, I don't know if I would characterise--
Us: Yes or no?
Them: Um, yes.
Us: And if anyone has enough faith and prays hard enough can call on this giant beard in the sky and get it to help them out, yes?
Them: Yes.
Us: And yet, though He will pay attention to everyone's individual nitpicks, he has yet to bother with any massive human crisis, especially not the ones engendered in His name.
Them: You don't know God's plan...
Us: I know, I know, God's ineffible, which also means you don't know God's plan either.
Us: So here's my question: there's this omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, ineffible force that you can call upon personally to aid you in any situation...
Us: How is that not magic?
thanks. I cannot wait until the next time the J-Dubs come around my neck of the woods.
That was fantastic.
Yeah, it came to me as I was attempting to sleep. I'm just glad I remembered it in the morning.
Ehh, it's a matter of definitions.
Anthropologists would say theres a blurry line between the two. Depended on the communities use of such forces etc.
And, quite frankly, I like being nice to the missionaries. I dunno why, part of it's pity, I think, and part of it is I know...like 30 or 40 people from Highschool that are on missions right now, some of whom I actually like.
I even helped a pair of them out at work the other day without grimmacing.
I geuss I'm no longer mad at mormons, it takes too much energy, and playing with them isn't worth it when I know what the results will be. Sometimes I like them, even if they're a bit screwy in the head.