Blarg!
ig et so shitfaced that i can't remember my own name, then do a rendition of i'm a little tea pot for all the folks at karaoke, then proceed to smash my mind to bits using the latest and most hight-tech neurological enhancements known to man.
it's not the best way to go about things, but it gets me through the night.(brain damage as a career choice? fuckin right, and don't forget smash my skull in on the ride home whiel whistlin dixie as your girl freind gives you a hand job at 130km/h)
Quote from: horab fibslagerit's not the best way to go about things, but it gets me through the night.
That's okay, dude...because as good Subgenii, we're up for ANY PROGRAM!
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This brings up a quote I remember from a popular sexual deviant of the 1980's.
"You gotta have faith."
-George Michael
Life's pretty bleak without it.
I was on a train recently just enjoying my weekly ride into the palais to do a spot of painting when someone forgot to close the door. See, these are all the old trains they renovated for the olympics and they put this immobiliser on them, if the doors are open, the train won't go, and the guard comes down to our carriage and starts getting all condescending about closing doors and reading signs... and the dumbass that didn't close the door gets up and says,
"Just because you've had a bad day." and I thought,
"No that's not it at all, power exists to be collected and dispersed, not excercised." Of course I didn't say that, who needs to be bludgeoned to death and then thrown out of a moving train by a 200-pound, recently divorced wannabe policewoman?
That's what gets me past the scumsuckers, helps me wade through the parking meter troglodites who want $200 just to say hello. the ethereal nature of their needs, Respect, Rights, Free speech, etc. We're an interaction of millions of processes, if you close you eyes and shut your mind, then run your fingers over the desk, where is the feeling? Who is touching what and when? It's just another cavern; All you can be sure of is that there is touch taking place, that's it.
They send me a thousand E-mails asking me to by their crap, steal what little slack I can get... but I don't have to give anything, just like back on the train. The vampires can jump and scream and whine about needing blood and you're the only fresh source not tapped out... but then the jehova's witnesses are only a problem if you don't scream when you open the door and then run under the bed and hide.
Speaking of which, I always wanted to act like rainman when the cancer council people start pestering me in the mall...
"Can't talk, shopping, have to shop, need shoes, must find shoes, she won't let me shop... AAHH AHH AHH AHH AHH AHH!!!!"
~Sleepy Trollax~
I just chose to sleep.
I was commanded, chained down, and forced to sleep by high grandmaster sleep fairydevil.
For me the better question is "how do you manage to sleep at night knowing how much you have lied, cheated, and abused peoples trust all because that's your 'job'?" And that's something I keep asking myself every day. When you take a position only later to find out what all it consists of... when it's against the few morals that you do have, but you can't just quit it due to a much greater and stronger purpose, what do you do? I find it hard to lay down and sleep at night... that's when the faces of all that I have betrayed come back to me... their innocent smiles and the shared laughs... the fun times we had before I suckered them into things they would normaly not do and then turned them over to the meat grinder of buerocracy.... Yea, I feel real good about myself. Try this little trick at home... go get your best friend to pick up a nice large ammount of pot for you, then go tell the cops that you heard him talking about picking up drugs at (time/location). Feels good, don't it? I've pretty much gotten to where I can only sleep when I'm either passed out drunk or falling down due to exhaustion.
Yes, I am an asshole for the man.
Yes, I hate myself for that.
I'm getting out of this situation soon, and always looking for a quicker way out, but that will not fix what I have done... nothing can and I know this.
Dad, I've done what you asked. Your final request has been fufilled. Are you happy with me now?
Asshole.
Sorry about that Roger... didn't mean to try and hijack your thread.
How do I manage to sleep at night? That's a good question. Mostly, it's a mixture of total exhaustion and complete depression. The hard part is convining myself to get back out of bed in the morning.
Ha! I take a supplement called 5-HTP to take the edge off of anxiety and insomnia, and then wear out my brain reading things (like the posts in this section), put on headsets and listen to "Lateralis" by Tool on loop, and tell myself that everything will be okay because there *are* other thinking people in the world. Somewhere.
La la la!
My methods are many and varied......I tweak them constantly hoping to stumble across the right combination. Usually, I go under deep cover and walk the night, haunt these forums, listen to Leonard Cohen, drink myself into and out of oblivilion, paint, write.
Lard help me, I even signed up for a 24 hour health club thinking there might be other zombies there at night. Nope. The damn place is full of perky, fluffy, brainless women wearing pink sweats. Sigh......Back to walking the night again.
Quote from: Rev ThwackFor me the better question is "how do you manage to sleep at night knowing how much you have lied, cheated, and abused peoples trust all because that's your 'job'?" And that's something I keep asking myself every day. When you take a position only later to find out what all it consists of... when it's against the few morals that you do have, but you can't just quit it due to a much greater and stronger purpose, what do you do? I find it hard to lay down and sleep at night...
A few years ago, The Good Reverend woke up and realized he was a plant manager for a company that made bombsights and Heads-up displays for fighters.
The only solution I could find was to burrow into the corporate scene, and then burst out, like an Alien through an astronaught's chest.
SOLUTION: Find another job. Then quit/get fired from your current job, after doing as much damage as you can.
Quote from: SssBella, Oracle of DoomLard help me, I even signed up for a 24 hour health club thinking there might be other zombies there at night. Nope. The damn place is full of perky, fluffy, brainless women wearing pink sweats. Sigh......Back to walking the night again.
Why? Saves on groceries!
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Quote from: Malgrinand tell myself that everything will be okay because there *are* other thinking people in the world. Somewhere.
Optimist! We're all robots.
no we're not... some of us are shapeshifting aliens that are nothing but a figment of the combined imaginations from this board.... well, ok, one of us is that.
Quote from: The Good Reverend RogerQuote from: Malgrinand tell myself that everything will be okay because there *are* other thinking people in the world. Somewhere.
Optimist! We're all robots.
Actually, I'm a Vampire. Although I never have figured out why I tan so well ...
Quote from: The Good Reverend RogerOptimist! We're all robots.
Quote from: Rev Thwackno we're not... some of us are shapeshifting aliens that are nothing but a figment of the combined imaginations from this board.... well, ok, one of us is that.
Quote from: SMFabalActually, I'm a Vampire. Although I never have figured out why I tan so well ...
<sigh> There goes
that illusion.
Quote from: SMFabalQuote from: The Good Reverend RogerQuote from: Malgrinand tell myself that everything will be okay because there *are* other thinking people in the world. Somewhere.
Optimist! We're all robots.
Actually, I'm a Vampire. Although I never have figured out why I tan so well ...
I'm a destiny that can't be chased and a choice that cannot be made... Go figure... I am an impossibility in every sense of the word... But then so is she...