Messages

::dragging just tons of video equipment around::

Set up over here.

Lights. Sound. Camera, Cue.

CNN Investigative Reports actuality take 1

::clap::

[THIS IS CNN]

   

THIS IS CNN

WE INTERRUPT THIS THREAD TO BRING YOU THIS IMPORTANT BULLETIN OF NATIONAL IMPORT FROM THE WORLDWIDE HEADQUARTERS OF CNN IN A SUPER SECRET, FLAME PROOF LOCATION IN THE DEEP SOUTH:


This is Natalie Portman. Today we look at the strange phenomena of dancing bananas and the adverse effect they are having on the economy.

We go now to Michael Pittman who is with Fed Chairman Alan Greenspan. Michael?

  Yes, Natalie, I am with Alan Greenspan, the chairman of the Federal Reserve.

Thank you, Michael.

Now, let's go to Jean Luc Picard who is with The Good Reverend Roger. Jean Luc?

  Somebody get this dog off me!!! Now!!!

Ah, we seem to be having problems with that feed. We'll try Jean Luc again later.

Now, let's go to Lt. Worf who is standing by with anonymous. Worf?

  Today is a good day to die!
  ::hacking and slashing noises::

Ah, yes, well, whatever.

And finally Thank God, we go to Julie Roberts with St. Hugh.

  Tell me, Mr. Hugh, what is the impact of dancing bananas on the world economy?
  You know you've got the bitchin'est tits.
  That's it. I'm going back to the swamp!

Ah, well, ah, that was different.

Thank you for tuning in to this special report from CNN. This is Natalie Portman reporting from a secret location where I am hiding from critics who have seen the rushes from Star Wars III.

Good day.

I don't care what my agent says, this is a shitty job. Exposure. It will give you exposure. God, what a maroon.

WE NOW RETURN YOU TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAMMING WHICH MAY ALREADY BE IN PROGESSIVE DETERIORATION.

OR NOT.

::writing everything down::

::sculking in the background::

::recording sound bites::

::taking notes::