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Yup. That's how you make them fall-off-the-bone-epic.

A non-lazy recipe:

Luigi's spicy Ribs recipe((Mario once said "Mama Mia! The flames didn't stop shooting out of my arsehole for two whole days!"))

Required Ingredients:

1 Rack of ribs per 2 people attending.
1 cup of Bullseye Buffalo Barbecue Sauce
5 TBSP of Curry
1 tsp each Salt, Pepper
Ketchup, as needed.
Optional:
Pretty much anything spicy. Like Cajun Seasoning. About a tablespoon or so.

6-8 hours before barbecuing:
Boil the fuck out of those ribs. Just stick them in a big pot with water in it, and leave it on about 3/4 power, for 6-8 hours.

5-10 minutes before barbecuing:
Pour all other ingredients into a bowl. Mix it up like crazy. You can use a blender, if you have too. Add ketchup to make it good and sticky.

Barbecue time:
Spread sauce over the ribs with a spoon.
Throw those ribs on the barbie. No, you idiot, not the doll. The Barbecue.
You don't need to cook them on the barbecue, they're already cooked. You just want to make the sauce a little charred.
Serve immediately with potatoe chips, french fries, or mashed potatoes. Salad is a sin.

Not at all. This is just a delicious, nutritious, and fast snack on the go. Coincidentally, "Delicious Chinese Food for two"

1) Find a chinese restaurant in the phone book.

2) Order good chinese food.

3) Nom good chinese food.

Recipe 2: Delicious Pizza for two:

1) Buy a frozen pizza from the store. Also buy at least two litres of pop per two people eating. If more than 4 people are eating, buy more pizzas. If more than one person weighs more than 300 pounds, buy many more pizzas. If one person weighs more than many 300 pound people, consult a medical practice immediately.

2) Rent/Buy/Illegally download((Not that I especially encourage this behavior, or partake it myself *wink wink*)) at least two movies. If this is a date, avoid the pornographic kind, unless you are both into the same kinds of porn.

3) Follow the directions on the box for how to cook the pizza.

4) Eat the pizza.

Too energy-intensive?

"Fast, Lazy Way":

1) Google, or use yellow-pages to find a decent local pizza shop that delivers pizza and pop. Have them deliver it. Follow steps 2 and 4 above.

"If at first you don't succeed..."

The Right Reverend Nigel:

You are suffering from not enough fun. I recommend at least 1 hour of oldschool mario games.

-Dr. Luigi

That's very sweet. However, I am actually suffering from too much fun, none of which involves a video screen, and I need to spend more time sleeping.

There is a song that asks what too much fun is, and never actually comes to a conclusion. And there can never be too much fun!

The Right Reverend Nigel:

You are suffering from not enough fun. I recommend at least 1 hour of oldschool mario games.

-Dr. Luigi

^Thanks.

...it was a pun on words. Sheesh.

Yeah. Well it might make some people happy. I like lazy recipes.

What?

We're going to start you off with a couple of delicious, but lazy, recipes.

Delicious Stir-Fry is Delicious.

Ingredients Required:

1 package of pre-cut meat. Be it Shrimp, Chicken Breasts, Fish, whatever. If it's Chicken Breasts, Fish, or steak, you will have to cut it into small pieces, which means more work.

1 package of frozen mixed vegetables
OR
4 Cans of various vegetables, preferably mixed vegetables.

1 package boiled, but unseasoned ramen noodles.

Seasonings required:

1 package of ramen seasoning, stolen from the above bag of boiled noodles.
1 tbsp garlic salt.
1/3 to 1/2 cup of any of the following sauces:
Teriyaki
Soy
Sweet and Sour
AND
Salt, Pepper, and more garlic salt to taste.


If Vegetables are canned, strain all that watery stuff, and throw them into the pan at the same time as the meat, if the vegetables are frozen, give them a minute or two alone, with the sauce of choice.

The next part is pretty simple. Turn the element on about 3/4 of the way to full power. Put everything into the frying pan. All of it. Spices last, vegetables and meat first. Then just stir it up a lot. You don't have to cook chicken that long, and fish either. 3 or 4 minutes at the most, if it's cut up right. Steak, on the other hand you'll want in for at least 6 to 9. Prawns/shrimp are a completely different story, it depends on how they are purchased. If they are pre-cooked, you can pretty much throw them in just long enough to warm them up, perhaps 2 minutes. Otherwise, 4 or 5 to be safe.

Keep in mind that the meat like steak, which takes longer to cook, may cause the vegetables to wilt, so you may want to put it in a couple minutes in, rather than right at first.

It is delicious, and can serve 2 to 3 light-eaters, or 1 very hungry person.