Messages

Meant to write sonnet
But ran out of syllables
Guess I'll do haiku.


Next topic: The sandwich that ate itself

It's probably wise
To stop when your arm snaps off
And falls to to the floor.

If you go too hard
It won't be your arm breaking
But your little leg.



The next topic is neither next nor a topic. Discuss.

*applause*

You may think you know about Christmas, but you don't know Christmas like I do! It's an alien conspiracy! *spaz*

I just tell them to have a 'nice diurnal anomaly,' and by the time they figure out what that means, I'm long gone.

 Me too.

And the needles are huge.  

   

*passes Eldora some phenylephrine*

Noodle doesn't need correcting. Just saying.

This one reminds me of some of the people here:

Some say you're a troubled boy
Just because you like to destroy
All the things that bring the idiots joy
Well, what's wrong with a little destruction?

-Franz Ferdinand, 'The Fallen'

Why are you wasting time with bottled beers when we have the Open Bar? Tsk tsk...

*crosses fingers* Oh, please let it be Matt Drudge...the worst thing to ever happen to fedoras.

 What a twunt!

Should we start placing bets on which reporter gets the knuckle sandwich then?

Proves nothing. I've seen deader people win elected office. But what on earth is he doing to that doorknob?

Now, weary Roger
Rest your head
For unlike me,
You're utterly dead.


*fires up the blender*

Let's see...I'v got tequila, gin, vodka, black rum, v8, coffee, carrot juice...carrot juice....carrot juice....

Now, who wants a drink?