I was just taking a hot shower when it struck me how much mediocrity has come to rule our lives.
I remember having higher expectations of life in this New American Century and somewhere along the way they were dashed against the rocks like the skull of an ancient semite child in a dusty, long forgotten passage of the Old Testament.
Every year we expect less of life.
It's not a willful choice, but a subconcious rationalization with our surroundings. The optimists have become the enemy. The chant of "things will get better, you'll see" is the rallying cry of the defeated. Let the people rally with "this shit sucks and we're not going to take anymore of it!"
And then I realize it won't be me. Because I have too much contempt for my fellow primates. Hypocritical contempt.
Why am I so fucking great? I'm not. I'm just a bitter pseudo-intellectual that makes himself feel better by lording it over the other mental midgets with my expanded vocabulary and fast talking. I mock the drivel they pour into their minds every night from the TeeVee and then I have the fucking gall to watch shit that isn't any fucking better.
My utter loathing is for the reflection of myself I see in the sea of humanity.
And there I go with the pretentious shit. Saying this doesn't atone for anything. And I'm not going to atone. I'm going to sit on my ass and rant and rave about everything under the sun and stars, but it doesn't matter what I say, because deep down inside, I don't believe in any of it.
I am filled to the brim with hate for my fellow man only because I need him to validate my own existence in some sad and pathetic way.
And I'll do nothing more. I like it here in this cage. Cable, internet, and all the escapist fantasies I need to forget about the heaping pile of shit that's growing in the corner, just like in all the other cells. We could clean it up ourselves, but fuck it. We'll trust the guards to do that. They've never done it before, but every day they say they will and though we gripe and moan, we still hold onto that bleak hope.
We're the ultimate optimists.
I remember having higher expectations of life in this New American Century and somewhere along the way they were dashed against the rocks like the skull of an ancient semite child in a dusty, long forgotten passage of the Old Testament.
Every year we expect less of life.
It's not a willful choice, but a subconcious rationalization with our surroundings. The optimists have become the enemy. The chant of "things will get better, you'll see" is the rallying cry of the defeated. Let the people rally with "this shit sucks and we're not going to take anymore of it!"
And then I realize it won't be me. Because I have too much contempt for my fellow primates. Hypocritical contempt.
Why am I so fucking great? I'm not. I'm just a bitter pseudo-intellectual that makes himself feel better by lording it over the other mental midgets with my expanded vocabulary and fast talking. I mock the drivel they pour into their minds every night from the TeeVee and then I have the fucking gall to watch shit that isn't any fucking better.
My utter loathing is for the reflection of myself I see in the sea of humanity.
And there I go with the pretentious shit. Saying this doesn't atone for anything. And I'm not going to atone. I'm going to sit on my ass and rant and rave about everything under the sun and stars, but it doesn't matter what I say, because deep down inside, I don't believe in any of it.
I am filled to the brim with hate for my fellow man only because I need him to validate my own existence in some sad and pathetic way.
And I'll do nothing more. I like it here in this cage. Cable, internet, and all the escapist fantasies I need to forget about the heaping pile of shit that's growing in the corner, just like in all the other cells. We could clean it up ourselves, but fuck it. We'll trust the guards to do that. They've never done it before, but every day they say they will and though we gripe and moan, we still hold onto that bleak hope.
We're the ultimate optimists.