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Apple Talk / It has come to my ATTN.
« on: March 04, 2012, 08:43:23 pm »
It recently came to my attention that these FUCKING ASSHOLES which I railed against so long ago are still on my planet. Thus I have returned because my wrath is elongate, phaliform and flabellate, and it will not be quenched.

ITT: You supply me with items to fuel my ragemobile. I supply the rage.

Bring and Brag / My drawings
« on: March 28, 2008, 03:44:01 am »

Thats the first one. There will be more.


Bring and Brag / Classical guitar recordings
« on: August 27, 2007, 10:43:29 pm »
So, this new laptop came with a built in microphone, and I decided to try some classical guitar recording on it. Actually, its not bad, turning out like a very quiet guitar recording from the 50s or 60s, kinda scratchy, and muddled like an old Segovia recording.

Se io m'accorgo ben mio d'un altro amante

Its a renaissance piece from the 16th century. Tell me what you think.

Note: Its really quiet, so turn up your volume.

Discordian Recipes / BMW's Perfect Potato Soup
« on: August 21, 2007, 06:21:22 pm »





pinch of chicken boulion or stock

salt and pepper

Cook peeled and cut potatoes with butter, onion, and boulion in big pot with water just covering until soft. Remove from heat and mash untill all big chunks are little chunks. Return to heat, add milk to thicken, salt and peper to taste.

Nothing more to a good potato soup than that.

Or Kill Me / Freedom and rights: some thoughts
« on: March 23, 2007, 09:13:35 pm »
The Good Reverend Roger has talked quite a bit about this in the past. Appologies to him if I infringe upon his material.

It seems to me that free will is an entirely useless concept. It assumes that freedom is something granted, by deity, creator, or whatever supernatural force you believe in. But if freedom can be granted, it can be taken away. If freedom can be taken from you, are you truly free? Freedom granted is not freedom at all.

Real freedom, if it exists, must come from oneself. It originates in our own action, and specifically, our choice of action. Its not a part of a society, an abstract principle. The American Declaration of Independance speaks of the inalienable liberty, something that can not be taken away, even if one tries. This liberty is inherent in every person, and it exists as choice. Not the ability to choose, but the choices made themselves. Ask yourself, do these choices follow my own path, my own values, or do they follow those of someone else? Its not important if your choices coincide with other peoples, or do not. Freedom is having the choice be your own, considering and deciding for oneself, not letting you be blindly dictated, or not. Self responsibility nicely follows. "I take this road. It is my decision, and mine alone, and thus the concequences of that action I take upon myself."

The possession of that choice is where the freedom lies. You may be taken to jail for an action you are responsible for, yet your freedom is not hindered. In actuallity, you may have excersiced more freedom than the guards who block your exit. This is because freedom is not the opportunities that life presents, but what you choose to do with them.

The same can be said of rights. If they are truely unalienable, they are not granted by someone else, they are part of oneself. A constitution is just a piece of paper with some scribbles. The freedom of speech is truly free not because its an amendment. Besides, many say that the US Constitution is dead from injury to its precepts.

I continue on with these as a part of myself. No deity grants me freedom, no document grants me rights. These are things I take for myself now and will continue to. I choose myself. That is freedom.

Ramblings, yes. I had to say it though.

Or Kill Me / Reverse Brainwashing: A Guide
« on: May 12, 2006, 05:03:00 am »
I'm  not all that great at this stuff, so I'm not posting a piece for the PD06. Instead, I am going to expand upon what I call reverse brainwashing, and was mentioned earlier in the brainstorming stages. Reverse Brainwashing works in nearly the same manner as the garden variety, except its purpose is to free the individual from their 'Iron Bar Prison', and get them to expand their imagination to think for themselves. To wake them up to reality, essentially. Like the opposite, reverse brainwashing rewrites a persons paradigm, and there are several stages to the process.

1. Hook the Sheep
   In this stage we attract those who may be more receptive to waking up at the moment. From earlier discussions, we have found that certain things work well to attract the target population. From polls of other discordians, we have found the target age group, the age group which is most receptive to this process is late teens (16-20). So the modes of attraction are aligned towards these individuals.
   Shiny things tend to catch peoples eye, that is, things that are oddly colored when compared to surroundings. The best way to go is LOUD. Clashing colors, bright graphics, complex, interesting looking graphics, these all get peoples attention. One color font is right out. Non standard fonts are better, but make sure they are easily readable. Make each sentence or thought a different color. Use bright colors, or at least those that contrast highly with the background. Make it ATTRACTIVE to teens these days. You know they spend all day in bland 'prisons', so make it look as different from the prison as possible!
   Place the propaganda in prominent locations. If you are going to disseminate fliers, dress cleanly and properly (depending on the location, maybe suit, maybe street gear), but don't say anything, just hand them out. At this point we are just trying to get them to notice.

2. Reel them in
   So, you've caught their attention. Now, what do you TELL them off the bat? Generally, members agree to leave out as many inside jokes as possible. Leave out 'classic' rich words too, like All Hail Eris, Fn0rd, Greyface, etc. These only get in the way of keeping them interested. In fact, leave out any mention of religion in general. Use newly coined phrases, like é─˙The Discordian Society cordially invites you to join us in a jailbreak...é─¨. Leave out as much classical humor as possible. Use questioning phrases.
   Most of all, intrigue them. Give them just a little meat to work with, using new buzzwords like é─˙Iron Bar Prisoné─¨. Make them want to come to you for more. Make the message short, don't draw it out. These kids have short attention spans, its got to be catchy.
   Finally, give them somewhere to go. Putting at the end of the flier is good, or the address to POEE. This is very important, and it will weed out those who are truly interested; they will take the initiative and come.

3. Operation Mindfuck
   In this stage we fuck with the dogma that is stuck in circuit. We weaken the prison with weirdness. This is the realm of the PD06 now in progress, it is the most difficult job of this process, and the most important. It is here that we begin changing the paradigm.
   The document itself has little ability for variability in length. On one hand, the potential discordians have short attention spans, so it should be short enough to adjust for this. On the other hand, there is a minimum length for such documents, because of the time needed for the weakening to occur. This is important: if the PD06 is too short, it will accomplish little or nothing in this stage. This is because a sort of minor hypnosis must occur, which allows the mind to be more easily screwed with.
   The PD06 must be easily accessible; if possible, it should be the first discordian document the potential has ever come across. The less he/she has heard before this point, the better. Put it next to or, if possible, in place of the original at
   It should look unassuming. Start out with the same sorts of things from the 'propaganda'. Give a little humor, but make it background. Use lots of buzzphrases. Use repetition. Lull them into an unassuming state, while slowly increasing the weirdness.
   When a critical point is reached, completely shatter their world view. Shock them.  Warning: this can only work if they are first lulled into that semi-hypnotic state. This is the point of turning, where the dogma that has been ingrained is broken. What they knew can't possibly be true anymore. So give them something else to know.

4. Reversing the cycle
   Throughout the PD06, subliminal messages should be placed. These should span around central themes such as freedom, 'jailbreak', thinking for oneself, imagination, waking up, etc. gradually increase the frequency of these and decrease the subliminality, until the critical point is reached. Then, all things should be about these central themes. At this point, we are taking their closed mind and replacing it with an open one. We broke their reality, and now supply a better one. Once you are at this point, you can say nearly anything, and a person will run with it, so be careful! Don't fall in the same traps as the original pd! Yes, some randomness, some humor, but don't make them the most important things. Otherwise you end up with more 'zomg23pinealglandlol' discordians, who are seldom well welcomed in most discordian forums, and their growth as people is also impeded.

5. Welcome the convert
   So a person is converted. What next? They most likely go to find more like them. Thus making active discordian web communities of high importance. The convert should be welcomed and guided. They still have lots to learn. Eventually they should be introduced to the full cannon of discordian literature. But for now, teach the basics. As before, keep the religious aspects low key. There is still the possibility to ostracise. Make them feel welcomed, give them praise and constructive criticism. Encourage them in their interests. In other words, be like good foster parents. They're still kids and have a long way to go!

One by one, we break the sheep from their Iron Bar Prisons and expand their imaginations, make them think for themselves. In turn, they break more from their prisons. Eventually, critical mass is reached. Our key word: Resolve. Evangelize with compassion and determination. And realize that there will be few in the beginning. We are hand picking our successors. They are the future of discordianism. Let us guide our future with intelligence.

                                 Yurito Sakari,

                      The Wannabe Buddhist Monk

Or Kill Me / Rant #1: Un-Intelligent Design
« on: October 27, 2005, 02:38:57 am »
Fuck the Discovery Institute


Michael Behe is a Fucktard


Why Intelligent Design is a Crock of Shit

é─˙TEACH THE CONTROVERSY!!é─¨ is the battle cry of ID advocates from Florida to Kansas, those oh-so friendly religious fanatics who are in the game to fornicate the nations public schools systems with the semen of Creationist é─˙Scienceé─¨ yet again, this time with a more scientific sounding name. Teach the Controversy, huh? Well, I'm here to tell that THERE IS NO FUCKING CONTROVERSY! Intelligent Design is still the same piece of useless shit that it always has been, yet these people insist that their (read as everybody's) children need to be exposed to all é─˙theoriesé─¨ equally. Of course, by theory, they mean a fucking guess written down by some old dead guys 2 millennial ago that is not only a fucking creation myth, but is FUCKING WRONG. Not to mention that its some of the most insipid crap I've ever read. But I digress. In the title I mentioned, among other things, that I would explain why ID is shit, and I intend to do that, now that I have shat some hate.

Reasons why Intelligent Design é─˙Theoryé─¨ consists of male Bovine fecal matter:

1. ID theory is not a theory: In scientific terms a theory is a well-substantiated explanation of some aspect of the natural world that can incorporate facts, laws, inferences, and tested hypotheses. Key words here are well-substantiated and tested hypotheses. Now, lets see what one of the leading é─˙scientisté─¨ advocates of ID has to say about theories...

Q In fact, your definition of scientific theory is synonymous with hypothesis, correct?

A Partly -- it can be synonymous with hypothesis, it can also include the National Academy s definition. But in fact, the scientific community uses the word "theory" in many times as synonymous with the word "hypothesis," other times it uses the word as a synonym for the definition reached by the National Academy, and at other times it uses it in other ways.

Q But the way you are using it is synonymous with the definition of hypothesis?

A No, I would disagree. It can be used to cover hypotheses, but it can also include ideas that are in fact well substantiated and so on. So while it does include ideas that are synonymous or in fact are hypotheses, it also includes stronger senses of that term.

Q And using your definition, intelligent design is a scientific theory, correct?

A Yes.

Q Under that same definition astrology is a scientific theory under your definition, correct?

A Under my definition, a scientific theory is a proposed explanation which focuses or points to physical, observable data and logical inferences. There are many things throughout the history of science which we now think to be incorrect which nonetheless would fit that -- which would fit that definition. Yes, astrology is in fact one, and so is the ether theory of the propagation of light, and many other -- many other theories as well.

The one giving answers is none other than Michael Behe, the forefront Messiah of the ID movement. While he pwns himself almost immediately by equating é─˙Theoryé─¨ to é─˙Hypothesisé─¨ (something no real scientist would do) he then continues to suggest that Astrology and (I have to stifle laughter for this one) ETHER THEORY are both scientific theories. But enough of Behe for now, I'll come back to him later. The greater point is, ID is NOT a scientific theory.

2. There is no evidence for ID: In short, the definition of Intelligent Design é─˙theoryé─¨ is é─˙since there are gaps in our knowledge of the universe, we conclude that it all came about by a é─˙Intelligent Designeré─¨. Thats it folks, the é─˙theory of Intelligent Designé─¨. In addition to not only being COMPLETLY FUCKING USELESS to science, it provides no evidence for its claim. Oh, fine, I guess I'll use Behe as a whipping post again, if only because its so fucking easy. Behe uses é─˙God of the Gapsé─¨ as his main standing point, in addition to something he calls é─˙Irreducible Complexityé─¨. In other words, because the universe is so fucking big, and because biology is so fucking complex, the only way it could have possibly come about is by Intelligent Design. He then Points to, among other things, the Sphinx at Cairo, the Eiffel Tower in Paris, and says é─˙They are complex and designed, therefore, biology must be designed as well.é─¨ Both é─˙God of the Gapsé─¨ and é─˙Irreducible Complexityé─¨ use the standard ID logic formula: If A is not fully understood or is often too complex for normal (read: stupid) people to understand, then A != B (B being modern scientific opinion) and A = C (Intelligent Design). What they forget is that crucial of all things in science: EVIDENCE. Without evidence, a hypothesis should not even be considered scientifically. In other words, ID is shit.

3. ID Scientist = Crackpot Fucktard: I've talk quite a bit about Michael Behe already. He used to be a prominent biochemist working at Lehigh University. He still works there, but now he isn't so prominent for biochemistry, rather, he's well known for being an ID advocate. He's even written several books. But his arguments are just repetitions of those I have already stated. Repetition is a favored tactic of ID advocates. Personally, I think its an attempt at hypnotism. ^_^ Lets take a look at some of the other leading é─˙ID scientistsé─¨.

William Dembski: Another Crackpot Fucktard. Mathematician and self-ascribed philosopher. Works directly for the Discovery Institute. Favorite quote: é─˙Intelligent Design is an 'Argument from Ignorance...'é─¨ I believe that = pwned.

Kevin Hovind: Young Earth Creationist (read: Wannabe Crackpot Fucktard) Calls himself é─˙Dr. Dinoé─¨. Quotes the Xtian Tree Corpse directly as science.

And there are many others, all of them Fucktards. The ringleader for this circus? Discovery Institute. As a front for the Republican Party, they pay é─˙respected scientistsé─¨ well for their bullshit. Except for Behe, of course. They stopped supporting when he committed career suicide at the recent Dover trial. I almost feel sorry for him. Almost.

4. Its all a mask: Heres the thing ID advocates don't want you to know, the thing that they will deny vehemently if you ask it (that is, unless you get them stirred up enough). This great secret is:

Intelligent Design = Scientific Creationism

Of course, we all know that. ID is just a mask for SC. The original Scientific Creationism was denied access to public education after the Scopes é─˙Monkeyé─¨ Trial in 1925, and ever since, SC advocates have been trying to weasel their way back into the classroom. The new vehicle is called Intelligent Design, mostly, I believe, because it sounds scientific to the layman. Even YECs are getting in the game, trying to sound like the Crackpot Fucktards.

In conclusion, ID is a crock of shit because it's just revamped creationism in disguise, a crude hypothesis without evidence, supported only by Crackpots and fundamentalists. Keep it out of the classroom. Better yet, round up all the Crackpots and put them in the asylums. Thats where they really belong anyway.


Or Kill Me / The Non-culture of America(TM)
« on: May 13, 2005, 01:12:39 am »
I was just sitting at my computer, and I realized I had no culture. Not in the sense that I have no family history, but rather that this country over the last hundred years has turned whatever culture my family had into mush.

Americans think they have culture, they tell you they do. They talk about sports and Nascar, hotdogs, Columbus, Jefferson, Franklin, and all those other dead dudes. They might even bring up the natives who previously occupied this continent.

But their all wrong. The melting pot of America has mixed and churned and poured out this mess that nowhere even resembles the cuture of a collective. Sure, you find scattered pieces here and there, relics, but nothing more. Theres nothing that holds us together as a people except a bunch of old men and women in a City a thousand miles away....

And I look at this mush that is grey and bland tasting, and I wonder, "What is MY culture, Who are my people?"

...I look around and know I have no people....

No one wants an American; You go to the mountain to ask for teaching and they throw you out. Its not that they hate us, rather, they are indifferent.

I don't want fast food, or Reality television, or any of that crap. That grey crap sticks to my soul and weighs me down.

And I feel like Im lost, cause I can't quite find where I belong.


Or Kill Me / What the hell just happened!?
« on: April 28, 2005, 08:13:16 pm »
I don't know why Im posting this. Its just that I can't quite figure out what the hell just happened.

Okay, I was in my Geology lab, and I was confused about the wording of a few questions. So I asked my prof about it, and tried to figure it out. But he just seemed to keep jumping around the question I was asking him about. I started to get frusterated, and finally I really pressed him. While I did, I darkly underlined the thing I was asking him about. and then he tells me to leave, saying "nobody talks to me like that in my classroom". And I left, went back to my room without a word, and cried myself to sleep, I guess, maybe cause I really respect the guy and he just humiliated me in front of the rest of the people there. Hes the guy who got me into this minor, and my advisor.

So I went to sleep, and had this really weird dream about changing things on television with your mind and some other shit. It was one of those really real dreams, one of those you know you are dreaming when you have it, and I actually forced myself to wake up out of it.

All in all, I woke up about a half an hour ago, and all I can think is "What the hell just happened!?" Its like its only a memory, except I looked in my lab book and found the place where I underlined. The class, the dream, all of it, Im just so confused as to what the hell happened.


Or Kill Me / Slightly in Shock
« on: April 08, 2005, 02:54:40 am »
I was talking to a 16 year old friend from home over MSN about that site that Eric just posted about over in that one thread; the one about the human extinctionists. I, personally, found it rather convincing to the reasons not to have children. I showed it to him, and he immediatly called it bullcrap, which really isn't that big of a deal; thats what I thought it was at first. So I rundow and listed reasons not to have children, and he started listing reasons why he wanted to have children. I used the logical conclusions to show alternative ways to the reasons he gave and he started to get upset, saying that I can go and not add another mouth to feed to the worlds population, but hes going to. Which struck me as odd, because he is ususally "vehement"ly opposed to hypocracy, and this struck me as a major statement of "them, not us". So I told him that, showed my concern, and I said I would drop it. The messenger went idle for a while and I went off to work on something else.

About ten minutes later, he messeges me that his mom is getting on the computer. So I say fine, goodbye, and I was about to close the window, when his mom starts messaging me. Now, in the past, when she does this, it tends to be just a few nice words and then I leave. But this time she immediatly and angrily posts that I am "feeding crap" to her son and I should stop or else, or something like that. Now, I know that her son is no dummy; hes quite an intelligent young lad. If I start talking crap, he is smart enough to call me out on it.

His mom is...lets say...a typical Xtian fundie. Her son was as well, untill he started learning more about theology and alternative religions. I guess the stimulus for that could be called my fault, but if he found it to be crap, he could have told me that. Instead, he found it to be profound, and has moved from a very Xtian view to something that seems more far eastern. I have acted as a kind of mentor for him at times, answering questions when I know the answers and pointing him to literature when I don't. More often than not, I pointed him towards the books.Wonderful disscussions insued. He was trying to keep this all secret from his parents, however, recently they've started to catch wind of it. They found the books on buddhism I lent him, as well as the ones he bought himself. And apparently, it is my fault for "corrupting" their "young boy", who, to tell you the truth, has done more adult like things at his age than I did, and is an intimate, sexual relationship with a young woman that he loves and is planning to marry. Of course, the parents don't know about any of this, especially the sexual part.

So, Im sitting at my computer, trying to have a sane conversation with this woman, and just barely keeping my cool. In the process I started shaking and sweating. I don't like confrontations like these, especially when I know the other side in real life. Over and over she accussed me of feeding her baby boy crap and corrupting him, and generally that I should stay far away from him. I stood my ground and explained that he is very much capable of discerning bs from fact, and that I only acted as an initial stimulus to his ongoing inquiry. Of course she countered that I was full of crap (I think she must have used that word about 30 times in the space of 5 minutes) and that he would most likely grow out of the "crap" I have "given" him in short time.

I know for a fact that he is never going back to Xtianity, hes actually grown into a pretty hefty opposition against it. So I tell her that I don't think thats likely. And she tells me that there may be freedom of speech, but she doesn't have to listen, agree with, or put up with my crap. (again, that word) I said, you don't have to listen to it, or agree with it, but you do have to put up with it (In a sense, thats the only duty that freedom of speech entails) I added that I wasn't initially talking with her, I was talking with her son, which was probably me being a smart ass, but that was the only thing I said that was slightly rude the whole time, and I had to do something that would keep me from getting too shaken up. She said that she has a right to monitor what her son does, in fact, it is her duty and obligation to do so. And then she said something else and signed out.

So I wasn't the first one to blink, as much as I would have liked to. Now that the shock has subsided, I feel strangly calm, as if I have won some small victory. And then pride starts to set in and I shut out that thought. I just hope I can wait a few days before another incounter like that.

~Yurito Sakari~

The Newly Mellowed-out Wannabe Buddhist Monk

Or Kill Me / Chaos is a Learning Experience
« on: March 05, 2005, 05:27:27 am »
In the last two weeks I have had a long crossing with Our Lady of Perpetual Discord. Either I crosses her path, or crosses my fingers, or crosses my eyes at her, or she was just bitchy about something I did or didn't do, or thought about doing. Or she just wanted me to learn some cool fun stuff, and so she forced me to learn the only way she knows. Through Chaos.

I am usually a pretty computer literate fellow. I know my way around the Win XP OS better than most. I can find almost anything I need using google. I have picked up most of the tricks that can be used in such a system.

But over the past few months, I had become increasingly aware of an itch forming in the back of my mind. This itch grew and grew without me realizing, until it was so strong I was unable to contain it. So I gave in, like the passive person I am. That itch was...


And Im not talking the normal "I think about it constantly, and spend all my freetime doing it." No, no. Its never like that for me. Obsession to me is always "I think, eat, breath, sleep, and DREAM it until I am so exausted that the Obsession itch wears out".

And this is a reacurring thing. One month it was calculus, another it was geology. I spent a whole six weeks pondering Lichens last fall. (Which are actually pretty cool, but thats another story).

This particular itch happened to be: Open Source software, and especially, Linux. Ah, the Unix God-Kernal Linux, how I did worship thee.

Anywho, Linux and open source became my life. I was...entranced by its non-corporate beauty, its non-binary programming, and especially, its amazing skills and non-error sensibilites.

Like I said earlier, I think these obsessions are the Crazy Lady's doings. They turn my life upsidedown as I am wrapped in her embrace of discord. I forget to eat for days at a time. Or drink. And I also find myself running to the toilet just before I burst. But the Chaotic Obsession drives me.

Which is where I come to the point of my rant
Wait, theres a point
Yes there is a point.

I have discovered over the years that, the times where I learn the most, are these times of Chaos, of obsession. Chaos FORCES  a person to learn. If you don't learn, you have a hard time surviving. Chaos is the way Eris teaches us all how to survive.  True, if we fail to listen, to become enveloped and learn, we probably don't lose our body, mind or both immediatly. Instead, what  those who have seen with Goddess' help to be an amazing, beautiful and humourous Multi-verse, is seen as a dull and ugly speck of humourless existance.

This obsession phase is over. But I hope Our Lady of Perpetual Discord brings another round soon.

~Yurito Sakari~

The Wannabe Buddhist Monk

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