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Topics - Q. G. Pennyworth

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Apple Talk / Nazi Poetry
« on: February 14, 2018, 04:58:04 pm »
Roses Are Red
I Like Your Moxie
Lets Get A Beer
And Go Punch A Nazi

Apple Talk / Sooooooo...
« on: January 25, 2018, 05:17:14 pm »
I joined a church? It's weird. The local UUs are, strange as this may sound, very nearly our kind of people. Like, the chair of the worship committee described it as "the church for people who burst into flames walking into other churches." Nobody talks about an afterlife. At. All. Nobody asks God to cure anybody of anything, nobody advocates being nice and letting sky pixies sort it out. The weekly prayer always includes something to the effect of "give us the balls to go fix this shit." The collection plate gets shared with lawyers who advocate for victims of sexual assault and charities serving Puerto Rico, the meeting hall gets used for meet the candidate events, and there are rainbow flags at the door and next to the altar. They hold discussions about systemic racism and white supremacy, they hold vigils on trans remembrance day, there are pagan-y services and the name tags include pronouns. The minister is a petite trans dude and the first time I saw him was at the pop-up "oh shit Nazis" in our town, and the first time I went in for a service was after those nazi fucks showed up in Boston and I cried like a bitch.
They really, genuinely, care about The Work, and they want to support the people doing it, and they want to do more of it themselves while keeping themselves sane. And yeah, they're not perfect, but they're queer and they're nice and they give a fuck and they fall down and get back up.

It's still super weird, you guys.

« on: November 19, 2017, 11:19:19 pm »
Once again, when presented with the means and opportunity to do so, I did not punch any nazis.

Principia Discussion / Saints
« on: September 29, 2017, 04:17:33 pm »
Oh Blessed St. Petrov
Patron of Keeping Your Cool
Who did not push the Shiny Red Button
No matter what protocol said
We beseech you, help us to breathe

You did not falter when the lights were blinking
And the soldiers were panicking
And the sirens blared
The end of the world was at your fingertips
And you left it there

Oh Blessed St Petrov
Let us follow in your footsteps
Let us refrain from burning the house down
At the whim of petty drama
Or malfunctioning technology

Oh Blessed St Petrov
Let us remain bipedal
In moments of crisis and desperation
Let us consider what is likely
Rather than what is frightening
Let us choose the path of uncertainty and reprimands
Over certain catastrophe

Oh Blessed St Petrov
Averter of Apocalypse
Let us not romanticize the collapse of civilization
Let us value the world
You preserved for our sakes

Oh Blessed St Petrov
Hear our prayer

Aneristic Illusions / He Will Never Be President
« on: September 29, 2017, 04:04:27 pm »
He will never be president. He will never be the hero the world needs but does not deserve. He will never pose dramatically on the barricades, never deliver the speech that propels the resistance to glorious victory from the wing of his f-15. We will never follow him to the gates of hell. Whatever "it" is, he does not have it.
It is 2017 and we are all struggling to breathe. We are all looking ahead, to the midterms, to 2020. We know we need to foster the talents of the rising stars, to lift up the people who will save us, who will right the ship of state in the nick of time, if it's not already too late. We put our love and our time and our energy into resistance, into the daily grind, into the campaigns of our future heroes.
He is no hero.
What he is, who he is, is smaller, and simpler. He is a man who cares about the intersection the pedestrians fear to cross, the sidewalks that are impassible to wheelchairs. He cares about public transit and bike lanes and lead pipes and innovative ways to pay for the mundane things a city needs to function. He cares about affordable housing and engaging the renter class in local politics, he cares about neighborhood beautification and neighborhood character and how systemic racism plays out in the local schools. He cares about the wild diversity of language and culture and religion and political thought in the crowded little postage stamp of the city limits. He cares about showing up.
He is unsuited for the revolution. He would collapse under the weight of a state or federal office, would falter in high stakes debates, would turn off voters in the vast swaths of Red America.
But he is perfectly right for the city council office for which he is running.

Will you be there when he needs you?

Aneristic Illusions / The Work
« on: August 17, 2017, 03:11:25 am »
I go home exhausted every day.
My brain checks out sometime around 9pm and it's just gooooooone.
I have an acute case of resting existential dread face.

It's 2017 and I am doing the work.

My state rep connected to me on facebook to personally explain why he can't be at the nazi punching, and it's a perfectly good reason and I'm glad he told me, and I'm glad that he noticed I kept blowing up his social media and calling his office.
It's work.

I chewed out some poor woman who was only doing her job, because "if it's not on her schedule the Representative won't be able to go" is not an appropriate response to NAZIS AT OUR DOORSTEP and it is not particularly brave or politically dangerous to publically appear in opposition to alt-right fuckwits in the bluest blue state, and how many more times do I need to call before standing up to nazis becomes a priority for the woman elected to represent me and my brown neighbors.
And I told her I was sorry for unloading on her and she's not at fault, and it's scary because I have kids and I don't want them growing up in a world like this, and it's frustrating making these calls all day, and it's hard when it feels like nobody's listening and I keep getting the run around.
It's work.

My state senator is on vacation and one of my US senators is in Korea on business. My governor said he would make it "if he could" and it's on fucking camera because I got myself into the press conference with two hours notice and asked him in front of the whole world, and I was so scared and spent that I did not hear his answer as he said it and I had to watch the replays over again hearing my own strange voice piping up from off screen, and I grabbed the hand of the friend who was next to me, who will probably misinterpret it as a romantic gesture but I was just flailing and needed to hold something for a second, I need to hold something for a second.
But I spoke up anyway, and I nailed the governor and the mayor both.
It's work.

I ruined Thanksgiving. No, I didn't ruin Thanksgiving, my dumbshit cousin did because he posted in my ex's feed and equated nazis to their opposition, and called Black Lives Matter a terrorist organization, and blamed the people put in the hospital and the woman killed by a fucking white supremacist for their own injuries, and it's NOT OKAY and it HASN'T BEEN OKAY and it's NOT RIGHT TO BE PATIENT ANYMORE.
My friend is losing her mother, who was never that good of a person and in fact was always racist, was always okay dropping n-bombs, was always a "war of northern aggression," "heritage not hate" dishrag. And that divide has been growing for years, but there's a difference between "I might have to cut ties eventually" and "this is finally it." So we held her and we told her it's okay to cry about it and it's okay to cut them out and we will be your Thanksgiving, and you have nothing to be sorry for.
It's work.

I spent half my day today explaining to straight white men how to be better allies. And it meant eating my own feelings for a minute and slowing down and not judging too hard. It meant pushing myself right to the point where I knew I was about to burst, and it meant getting to that cliff face and telling someone "if you keep going this will get ugly, please stop" and having him ignore me and plow on anyway, and even as I am getting heated insisting that "this isn't an argument" and not hearing me when I said I did not want to keep going. And another man had to come and tell him to take a break, and I had to play nice when he came back, and pretend that his "I was only..." explanations were enough. And I could have told him to fuck off, I would have been justified in telling him to fuck off, but he has already moved really far and there is good reason to believe he can be fully bipedal someday, and it won't happen if I blow up too hard, and I have an obligation to try and help people get there if I have the spoons to do so and they are willing to do their part.
It's work.

Are you doing the fucking work?

« on: July 24, 2017, 01:41:49 am »

This is the print version, online is next in the pipe


« on: July 10, 2017, 03:27:23 am »
I would like to launch a patreon to subsidize my work on Holy Nonsense and the flyers, QGP art, and related stuff and nonsense I get up to. Nothing is going behind a paywall. I'll still be releasing Holy Nonsense on PeeDee and distributing things as far and wide as possible, and patrons won't get to dictate anything getting into the book. The only difference would be that I get slightly less shit for doing this instead of taking work on fiver or whatever.

In the unlikely event that I get filthy rich on this, money will be thrown at PD costs and other causes the contributors request.

I think this is still within the non-commercial license all HN authors agreed to, but I would feel better if folks chime in and let me know if this is okay.

Apple Talk / Live While You're Alive
« on: July 09, 2017, 07:20:37 pm »
Give everything to this life, because if there is another we have yet to see it. Give everything to this life for your reserves will not serve you past your dying breath. Change while you are in this world of change, for even the most pleasant of other worlds we have been promised after this one are all fossilized and stale. Change this world, change the people and yourself. Breathe the air of this world and do not stop until you cannot draw breath. Smile. Scream. Do not die with anything in reserve.

Death comes sudden to some and slow to others and you never really know which way it'll go for you until it's too late, so be ready. Remember that you are a thing your body is doing, so take care of your body as best as you're able, so it can do a good job of being you. Remember that what happens after is largely a function of the stories you leave behind, so take risks now and then. Get banged up. Get your heart broken. Maybe crack a bone or two. Overinvest in people. Some of them will fuck you over but the ones who don't will likely outnumber them and come to your aid when you're down and out, and even if that's not the case screw the bean counting and overinvest anyway. Because you can't take anything with you and you can't bequeath your emotional reserves to your children anyway. Love catastrophically. Cook big meals. Sing loud. Make bad art and write bad fiction. Make terrible jokes, and laugh your stupid heart to death.

Live while you're alive.

Apple Talk / A note from your Friendly Neighborhood Propagandist
« on: July 03, 2017, 06:14:41 pm »
External validation helps me keep moving. If you see threads with pdfs or images you like, mittens and/or constructive criticism are encouraged.

Please clap.

Propaganda Depository / Go Mindfuck Yourself (multiple formats)
« on: July 03, 2017, 03:09:06 pm »
A new layout for one from the Et Cetera Discordia. I did this before with a blue background but I've been hating on it for a while so here's the better version. Two pdf attachments here! The booklet is for print only. Duplex, flip on short side, fold in half for pretty propaganda. The other pdf is suitable for online viewing, or printing single sided for postering.

The images here are from the online/poster order.

Propaganda Depository / Ladies of Discord pdf
« on: June 30, 2017, 06:38:46 pm »
Some editorial comments and asides from Holy Nonsense, gathered here for your amusement. This is a multipurpose pdf. You can print it out as a booklet (duplex, flip on short side) OR you can print it single sided, and cut in half for postering.

Or Kill Me / We have to be ready to fight.
« on: June 14, 2017, 04:54:42 pm »
We have to be ready, at all times, in all places, to fight. On the bus, in the school, at the mall, on the street. In chatrooms and forums and businesses and libraries. We have to be ready to fight at city hall and the state house and the commons and the grocery store.

We have to be ready to fight.

There is no peace that will hold forever, evil will never be vanquished. Our neighbors and co-workers and our family are all susceptible to the siren call of enemy ideology. Even we are not immune. We must put our stakes in the ground. We must hold our lines.

It is not enough to be merely "not evil." It has never been enough. We must be ready to fight, if we are able, because not everyone can. It's not enough to say it's someone else's problem, it's not enough to bite our tongues to keep the peace. It is not enough to defend the utopian ideal of tolerance at all costs.

If you tolerate hatred, you're an asshole.

We have to be ready to fight, even when our enemies hide their attacks behind "I'm only joking" and "free speech means awful speech." We have to be ready to fight when they invade the spaces we thought were safe. We cannot wait for the mods to wake up, we must take up arms ourselves.

We are the only ones we can count on.
We have to be ready to fight.

Apple Talk / Something To Do
« on: June 11, 2017, 05:57:31 pm »
So, there's this story from 2015 where a man from Senoia, Georgia drove a truck through his own house. And sure, you see stories all the time about accidents where a driver fell asleep at the wheel, or hit the gas when they thought it was the brake, or thought they were in reverse when they were in drive, or what have you, but this was none of that. He drove his truck through his house, clear through from the back yard to the front, intentionally.

This made the news, in several outlets. There are photos.

Some iterations of this story accuse -- and I shit you not this is his real name -- John Paul Jones Jr. of driving through the house because he was frustrated nobody wanted to buy it, but I'm mostly interested in the version of the story that CBS46 went with. I found it because of the fantastic final line: "Jones is not being charged with a crime because there's nothing against the law about driving a truck through a house, as long as it's your truck and your house." It got passed around social media, because of course it did, and eventually wound up in one of my random feeds, and I had to go track it down.

This version of the story refutes earlier reports, saying Jones wasn't mad at the house, but just frustrated in general. He'd just gotten off the phone with his wife, he's been out of work for a year and a half, one thing just led to another.

It's important to know that Jones is a contractor. He fixed all the damage to the house in two days. "I've been out of work for the past year and a half. Needed some work," he told CBS46. "It didn't pay anything, but hey, it kept me busy."

And yeah, that's pretty fucking funny. The bit where he tells the cops he did it because he needed air conditioning is great. But like everything, if you look at it long enough, you start seeing pieces of bigger things in it.

So I'm sitting here, reading essentially a "news of the weird" post, and I'm starting to think about the economy in Georgia, and the private contracting economy across the country. I'm thinking about the recession that never really ended, not for poor folks, and I'm thinking about all the people who bought "fixer-uppers" in 2007. And then I think about certain breeds of dog, the ones where they need something to do or they will tear holes in your yard and destroy your house.

And I think about this guy, John Jones, generic as can be. And I think about how he needed something to do.

Apple Talk / Greater Boston Area Legion of Dynamic Discord
« on: June 10, 2017, 10:10:59 pm »
I made a page for it. hxxps://

Any advice on what stuff goes on a page like this?

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