Messages

[is]

This world is made from chaos, born from it, and you, goddess knows why, signed up for a chaos-based religion.

Well, now a big meaty chunk of that chaos has escaped from the neatly pencilled line you drew around it, and is contorting your reality with fresh new horrors.  And here you are getting all shocked and dismayed and running around yapping like a chihuaha that just realized it's about to be castrated.

Isn't this what you wanted?  Did you think Discordianism was just a bunch of randos goofing off, talking shit, and making lame jokes about the hotdog truck that spilled its cargo over interstate 83? Have you completely missed the point?

Forget that junk, look to the roots of things.

You're here, reading the tattered remnants of this moth-chewed forum, so you already recognize that Christianity has nothing to do with loving your neighbour, or following the Bible.  Its root is "We chose ourselves as the chosen people, and now we have the God-given duty to fuck everyone up and take their stuff."

And, just like that, Discordia has nothing to do with the Principia book, or the BIP, or a measured introspection of your belief structures.  The root of Discordia is petty spite.  It's about carelessly wiping out a major city-state because someone didn't invite you to their party.

Do you get it, now?  Trump is born of Eris.  Trump is the incarnation of Eris.  Trump is Eris.  He is petty, spiteful, random, careless of consequences.  He's exactly the kind of god you wanted, the one you voted for, and now he's wandering free over the Earth, crashing everyone's party!

Isn't it fun?

I'd rather be part of Canada

We don't want you.  You screwed up your country, we don't need you screwing up ours, too.

Yeah, he'd vote for the greens to benefit the conservatives or UCP because the liberals aren't pure enough for him.

And it's not just Pergamos in particular, or the people like him, we don't want any seceded states trying to join up.

Even the bluest of your blue states is politically very toxic, and we've already got at least two toxic provinces.  (I'm living in one of them).  It's enough.  Individual Americans who want to immigrate or seek asylum is one thing, but your systems are pure poison.

There is a lack of understanding south of the border about exactly how much hate has accumulated up here over the last several months.

I'd rather be part of Canada

We don't want you.  You screwed up your country, we don't need you screwing up ours, too.

You expect the truth to matter? 

It always does, one way or another.

Y'all knew the truth about Trump, and that clearly didn't matter.

The only truth that really matters in your country now is that which flows from the barrel of a gun.

Interesting note:  The soldiers were not impressed.  They were out of step, for chrissakes.  My drill sergeant would have unscrewed my neckpipe and shat down it if I had marched to the chow hall like that at the end of week one.

That has to be deliberate.

I've encountered two narratives:  Either they were intentionally out of step, as a volitional expression of disrespect (i.e., Foxtrot Delta Tango), or they were pissed that they had to spend their weekend doing this, and were just really half-assing it.

I consider the first explanation more likely.  Anyway, it seems that der Fuhrer has not earned the loyalty of the Wehrmacht, which may be important if he attempts to override the results of the mid-term elections (if any).

The Department of Health and Human Services will announce that lead deficiency in children is a leading cause of mental disease of liberalism.

Chewable lead supplements will be made in the shape of popular cartoon characters.

Or--hear me out--they'll just add lead to the drinking water, instead of fluoride.

Hollow it out (if necessary), then fill it with nitroglycerin?

I had something to say, but I forgot what it was.

The discord server is by special invitation only.  Or, it doesn't exist.  I'm not sure which.

[...] my having voted 3rd party [...]

You wanted Harris to lose, and she did.  You and your kind are responsible for what happens now.  However far up your ass you stick your head, it will not wash the blood from your hands.

All prophets are false.
Some prophecies are true.

Well, now Elon Musk is giving Nazi salutes in public, and I feel like I should be out there throwing a brick at something.

[vision statement]

So I just got a text - on Sunday - from Incompetence Coordinator Phil, asking me to please stop being a dick and provide a "vision statement" for my departments.

I have settled on "We are all monsters together."

It's perfect.

I have a confession to make.

I may play chaotic neutral on the internet, but that's just an act, or, at best, an ideal.
My natural disposition is lawful evil.

This climate change thing isn't going to cause the sudden major catastrophe that you expected.  Well, not just yet.  Not to you.

The weather events will be more frequent and more severe, but they won't be anything new.  The droughts will be dryer, the floods will be wetter, the forest fires will be bigger, and the hurricanes will hit harder and more often, but it's just the same-old, same-old, variations on a theme.  Florida deserves what's coming to it, California has always been on fire, and India and Africa are too far away to bother about.  The Atlantic ocean currents won't collapse for a while yet, and no one really cares if those moldy old Europeans freeze, anyway.

Reduced food production will drop the planetary carrying capacity by a few billion humans.

Grocery prices will go up, and selection will go down.  Forget about lychees and pomelos, get used to potatoes and apples.  If it isn't produced within a couple hundred km of where you live, don't count on it remaining available.  Don't count on it even then; locality helps, but it's no substitute for a heavily-stocked arsenal and a healthy supply of gasoline.

Things can be done, and will be, but not nearly enough.  You still depend on fossil fuels, don't you?  If you haven't stopped, why would you expect everyone else to?  You're waiting for Someone Else to fix everything?  Well, they won't.  They're not any more motivated than you are, and won't be until it's too late.

The people will demand an all-powerful leader to save them, or at least to stick it to the Other Guy, so politics will shift sharply to the right.  This will work as well as it usually does.  You'll see, Trump won't be that bad.  Not like his successors.

But do not despair!  There is hope!