Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Principia Discussion => Topic started by: Luna on December 22, 2011, 10:09:28 am

Title: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 22, 2011, 10:09:28 am
It's late, and I've had wine, but I can't believe that I'm the only one who's noticed this: in the five or six years of posting here, and despite the petty interfaith shit flinging we do on a regular basis, there is this.

We have reached consensus.

Our little tribe has done a LOT of talking, and we've changed our minds quite a bit. TOWARDS each other.

Our core ideals and outlook are, at their heart, aligned. We've stripped away the outer biases, and now we only fight over our inner ones.

Who's going to argue over TGRRs prophecy? Cain's insights? Cram's IRL plots? Kai's science?  ECH's cooking?

We transformed from a bunch of strangers figuring things out into a group of friends, relating our daily struggles.

I don't really know how to say this without it sounding sort of insistent, but:
Wouldn't this be the time to compile all of these core ideals and observations into another Principa-level document? A sort of "progress report"? Maybe?


I like this idea.  (And, hi, Nyx, I don't think we've met.)

It has also sparked another idea...

What do y'all think of a project tentatively called, "Who Are We?"  This is off the top of my head, suggestions are welcome.

I'll collect pieces we write about each other.  No hit pieces, but not just gushing, tell me how you see somebody.  Several somebodies.  Make them funny, make them interesting, make them real, make them up.  Email them to me (one spag per email), I'll try my hand at editing them together, pick the best few I get for each poster.

Also to include, send me your best "Who are we?" bits.  (I love those, but will only use the ones you send, since that'd be permission... and search is borked, and they happen in random places.

Essays about the place in general.  What is peedee.com?  Tell me about shit here.  Tell me about douchenozzle n00bs.  Tell me about how we make you think, how we make you feel.

Default will be no author names, unless requested.  Don't ask me "who wrote that?"  I ain't saying, but if somebody recognizes your writing style, it ain't my fault.

If someone does not want pieces about them included, I will respect that, of course, just drop me an email.  If y'all prefer, I can run the finished "this is what I have on you" by people before it goes up for an, "oh, god, no."

Pics.  Artwork.  WOMPs.

What do you think?  Format will probably be a webpage, unless somebody wants to hold my hand through making something paper out of it.

Broken out of Roger's thread to see if it's got legs. 
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 22, 2011, 12:54:10 pm
Gonna have to do some digging, but I'm up for this.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Placid Dingo on December 22, 2011, 01:30:11 pm
Likewise, but allow maybe a month for me to send something.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 22, 2011, 01:54:06 pm
Great!  

Anybody who wants to contribute, please do, keep 'em coming until it's done.

Luna@princxxxxx.com, one piece per email, please.  (This is so I can sort 'em easier.)  It you remember to put something in the heading like "Who Are We? - LMNO" (or whoever you're writing about), I will be very happy.

I don't expect people to spit this out quickly, take your time, and don't stress over the holidays over it.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 22, 2011, 02:02:36 pm
Hey, I found about ten pages worth of "who are we" rants from the boards.  I could post them here, or send them to you.  It might be fun to see them all collected together in one thread, but I don't want to clog it up.

There are some real doozys.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 22, 2011, 02:16:49 pm
Hey, I found about ten pages worth of "who are we" rants from the boards.  I could post them here, or send them to you.  It might be fun to see them all collected together in one thread, but I don't want to clog it up.

There are some real doozys.

Post 'em up.  I won't use 'em without the author's OK, so if anybody sees theirs here and wants it in, gimme an OK.  Clog away, I love those.   :D
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 22, 2011, 02:19:07 pm
Who are we?

LMNO
We're the control people.  The In Charge people.  The people who put Ends before Means.  The Living Large, Taking Charge people.  The people who invented phrases like "acceptable losses".  "Collateral damage".  "Mutually assured destruction". We're the requirement people.  We're the sorting process.  The ladder.  We're the big hen who pecks the smaller hen. We're the smaller hen, looking for something to peck.  We're the Conditional Charity people. The Regulatory people.  The Authority™ people.
Who are we?

TGRR
We're the snarling bumper-to-bumper dog men who honk our horns in traffic jams.  We're the fat guy on a plane berating a young mother for her crying infant.  We're the jackass who puts his seat right back into your lap.  We're the crooked sheriff, the bent politician, the smarmy bureaucrat that smiles when he says "no".  We're your neighbors, your school teachers, your bus driver.
Who are we?


LMNO
We're the Satisfied people.  The content people.  The people who see no need to go into the streets, because the couch is so comfortable.  We're the receptive people, the observers.  The people who believe what our parents, our teachers, our politicians, our priests tell us.  We're the people who do what we're told.  Who hate what we're told to hate.  We're the single-file people.  The sit up straight people. The status quo people.
Who are we?


RAT
We're the people that like to write words. We're the people that like to think a post on a forum replaces action and supporting your troops in blog comments makes you a Real American. We're the people that have abandoned the community we live in, with their different opinions, different habits, different beliefs and we've replaced it with a virtual community that is virtually us. They agree with our views and they believe in our beliefs and they support our heroes and hate our enemies. We're the future, the future of everything. Our laws WILL pass (everyone I know already supports it!), our beliefs will prevail (I haven't talked to a person in months that disagrees with that!!), our Truth is the Truth and that other virtual community over there that disagrees are virtually imbeciles.
Who are we?


LMNO
We're the Social People. People friending people. Informing our friends with how many they are. What they are. A numbers game. The more friends, the luckier they should feel to be one of those people. The group everybody wants to be part of. Your friends. Your people. The people that should know you're walking your dog. Instantly. Directly connected via the Web. Close to you. Just a few sticky strands away. Closer than would be possible or comfortable in reality. Our Tubes provide their nourishment. Always and everywhere.

We’re the FARMVILLE people.  We're the people that farm your time.  Because you weren't doing anything with it anyway, right?  We make everything happy, even stoop-labor sharecropping.  Because if you can't BE a farmer, you can FEEL like one.  It's like the old days, only without all that annoying productivity.  We'd like to take you back to a simpler time, when farming took only a few hours a day.  Who are we?

We're the FOURSQUARE people.  We know where you are, we know who you're with.  We can track you within a three meter radius.  We know when you've left your phone at home, and we know that you shouldn't be taking that right on red.  We know you're cheating on your wife, and we can track you from work to the porn shop on 86th street to home.  We can locate you, your family, and your pets.  Who are we?

We're the 3G people, the network people.  You're in our phone network, checking your social network, staying perfectly still in that fragile overstretched web.  Can't struggle or it'll break, can't revolt or you're just falling.  We are contact, we are social livelihood, and as far as you know we always have been.  Your kids have only ever known it this way and you can't remember when it wasn't.  You can't remember a phone call as something you did for an activity instead of something you did while doing something else.  You can't remember agreeing to meet at a specific time and place in advance of leaving your house, can't remember planning.  Who are we?

We're the people who give you what you need.  E-warmth.  E-Friends.  A place to put up all the private details of your life for the world to see.  Think of it this way:  Before, you had to go to great pains for strangers to get pictures and details about your children, and now you can do it in just minutes a day!  In your grandfather's day, stalkers and pedos were really hard to come by, but now you can have them all with just the click of a mouse, thanks to our state of the art technology and utter lack of annoying ethics!  Who are we?

Who's Big Brother? 

Not us.  We just provide the service.  That's what we do.  Sure you might have to look at a few tiny adds, but those are easy to ignore.  In fact, tell us if you don't liek them.  We'll find some better ones for you. 

You chose to use the service.  You wanted to.  You thought it looked fun. 
Have a weird view, or don't like somethign that's happeneing?  Please log in, post an update about it!  We're the people that provide the milieu.  Jsut so you can play with it.  Jsut so we can watch you play. 

We're the line you follow.  Routes are hard and streets are confusing, especially because they're the last damn thing you had to think about dynamically.  There's a bright green line on the same screen that has your friends' smiling faces.  Just keep on that line.  You don't need to choose your own route and if you can't manage to do it we'll fix that line for you to follow again.  Don't stray, and give us your rapt attention.  There are beautiful things out the windows and relaxing daydreams to be had that'll only serve to get you irrevocably lost.  Then you're in a right fiasco because all the faces not on our screen are out to get you and none of them know the way even if you asked because they're following their own lines.  Listen to the voice that comes with the line.  It'll make you feel less alone.
Who are we?


RICHTER
We're the web 3.0 people. We'll bring you the sights, the sounds, the sneak peak trailers right after this message.  The helpful adds that pop up when you roll over our banner, the seperate windows referring you to products associated with highlighted words.  Any marketing is good marketing, and we'll put good marketing anywhere.  Remember those web pages you used to surf?  Isolated islands and webrings hooked up only by links?  No need to use that now.  We'll show you the things that are the best matches to what you want, right at the tip of your search engine.
Who are we?


EOC
We're the beginning.  We're upstart, fledgling.  A decade ago you would have laughed if we'd told you where we'd be today.  Just like you'd recoil in horror if we could tell you where we'll be a decade from now.  That isn't how we work, though.  When that day is actually here, you'll hardly blink an eye.  Who are we?  Second nature.  Intuition.  Thumb flick tap slide pinch click response.  You can't remember what a learning curve is.  The phrase has a dirty word in it, one that's opposite of accessible and open and easy.  What were we doing, when you thought we were making operation simpler for on-the-go?  We were minimizing down time, time away, your time.  Who are we?
RICHTER
We're the hip people.  The smiling faces in all those club night pictures you see three friends over from your.  The party people.  The ones having the good time at places you'll enver be allowed into, drinking the good drinks.  The noise is never loud to us and the crowd never a problem for us.  We're happy.  If you measure up, we might let you join us.
Who are we?


UNCLE WALLIFIED
We're the political people.  We are the revolutionaries, the bold dreamers of a new era. We know you work hard, and we know that sometimes you get frustrated at the way the world goes round. You're tired of socialism, right? Aren't you tired of all those bleeding-heart liberals ruining the nation? We want you to know that that's ok. You do have options. You may not be able to afford them right now, but do things our way and you'll have plenty of money to pay for your own roads when the time finally comes. We promise. Who are we?

JENNE
We're the righteous people.  We give you all you need to feel you're right.  Think you're not?  That's OK!  We have plenty of bullhorns and misspelled signage that drowns those niggling little fears right away!  Afraid you might still be going to Hell?  Not to worry, we have all you need to feel the right way.  Sunday mornings, Wednesday evenings!  Coffee shops inside your local box church to make YOU feel right at home.  Consume your religion, and you'll get a Grade A bonus of sending the little ones who can't afford it Jesus Camp!  We donate 10% of our profits not to a prophet but to preach and teach to those nasty, sinning neighbors of yours!

Who are we?  We're the people on YOUR side.  Right, wrong, indifferent?  That's ok!  We have a club for you!  You'll always belong, you'll always have a label.  We want you to fit in, fit right and move forward.  Nothing will get done, but you'll still feel like it is!  We'll funnel your tax money into the causes you think you want, and if you don't know what you want, we'll TELL you.  We're the people with answers, answers to questions you didn't even know existed!  Why suffer with education, information and soundbites no one understands anymore?

We will tell you what you need to know, what you need to think, and which group you belong to.  You belong.  You belong with us.
Who are we?


GARBO
We are your neighbors. The ones with the nicer car and the nicer house. Our kids are better, our wives prettier, our husbands more handsome, our pets cuter than yours. Your wife wants to have coffee with ours, your husband wants to bullshit with ours over the fence, your kids want to hang out with ours. Hell, you and yours want to be us.
But you can't.
Who are we?


ROARING BISCUIT
We're the enemies you haven't made yet, we're the friends you don't speak to anymore.  We're the people who used to care for you, and the people who still do.  We're the hippes and vegans and the people who think that making a statement is what matters.  Who are we?

We're the dead flies on your windscreen, the skeletons in your closet.  We're the hedgehog crushed under your car tire when you were 17, and your girlfriend cried for an hour.  We're the wanderlust and the fear.

We're the teachers, parents and friends who never believed in you.  We killed your dreams.  We're the dull pavement that carries you to work.  We're the hollow skyscrapers and the walls of your office cubicles.  We are the pathetic displays of individuality that you think are keeping you sane.  We are everything you hate and fear, and we define everything you love.

We made you, and you will be ours.

Who aren't we.

LMNO
We’re the tweeting people.  The updating people.  The people who desperately need to keep you informed of what is going on, in detailed minu

tia, in 140 characters or less.  To describe to you our dog’s dietary habits, from both ends.  And where we are.  And that we just put anoth

er $500 on our credit cards, almost maxed it out, ; - )  And to tell you exactly what we think about the latest reality show where desperate w

omen whose best days have passed them by in exchange for silicon and imitation designer handbags suck up the brackish residue of celebrity in

an attempt to salvage their long-ago abandoned hopes for love and stability, but are ultimately ground down into hair-pulling caricatures th

at only make a mockery of your struggles to get through an ordinary day without eating the barrel of your grandfather’s service revolver.  LOL
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 22, 2011, 02:19:55 pm
FUJIKOMA
Who are we? We are the battered, bitter shells. We are the hollow product of broken glass homes. We keep quite while the world goes by. When you pass by you do not see us, when you look we are not there. We find our homes in cold, dark corners. We are the coming storm.

Who are we? We are the children of tomorrow, of yesterday, but never of today. The outcasts, the unfriendly people. You see us when we act out, and you torment us when we do not. The sad people, the broken people, and deservedly so. We continue the cycle, we are the bitter fruit that stings the tongue.

Who are we? We are the product of consumerism, the inadvertent outcome of nepotism, the slimy shades in back alleyways that melt into the eaves. We watch you while you are fortunate, we drag you down, and we take from you when you fall. We are the chosen fools, disciples of the madness you created, to which you show unconcern. We are a debt someone never paid, an obligation unfulfilled, this is who we are.
Who are we?


RWHN
We're the people waiting for you to go first.  We talk a good game but never throw down.  We praise your good ideas and exhalt your plans.  We'll be right there behind you!  Well, actually, right after we wash our hair.  Then we're right there with you!  Oh, well, no, we have to renew our gym membership, I mean, it's gonna be a new year, we're going to hit the stair climbers for sure this year!  Then, we'll be ripped and ready to fight the good fight along side you...oh wait, we just remembered we need to clean up the hard drive.  That shouldn't take too long, and then, holy fuck are we ready to rumble!!!  Well, we probably should get a new bottle of asprin first.  We might get a headache while trying to fight The Man.  Go on ahead, we'll be there eventually, really, trust us, who are we?
LMNO
We're the glitch people.  The people in the back, wearing ties, throwing packets of fake blood and blaming the kids behind us.  The people who you see leaving last before the building collapses.  We're the fading people.  The people who simply aren't there when the riot cops show up.  The people you pass by every day, failing to comprehend the chaos left in our wake.  The ones who know how to get things done, but keep our heads down, our mouths shut.
Who are we?

TGRR
We're the technical people.  The people that seem to be just another crowd of jackasses, but always seem to be gone 10 minutes before it happens.  The quiet people, the people who look sort of like you, but maybe grin a bit too much.  The people who don't seem to care about important things, like the troops and mom and apple pie, but never seem to ride in the back seat of the squad cars.
Who are we?

ADIOS (CHARLEY?)
Sometimes you think you see us out of the corner of your eye, almost ethereal, but never there when you turn your head to look directly at us. We smile and occasionally laugh at your confusion and consternation. We are the ones who are aware of what goes on behind the scenes, which is all that really matters anyway, because everything else is just show and glitter. A whitewashed version of the truth.
Who are we?


LUNA
We're the ones who realize that caring about everything is as useless as caring about nothing, and caring about everybody is as useless as caring about nobody.  We're the ones who can find the mirth under the horror and embrace it, despite it being covered with gore.  We're the ones who realize that the only thing really worth being serious about is having a good time.
Who are we?


NIGEL
We're the salvage people. The people with the truck and the jumpsuits loading unknown debris from the abandoned building around the corner. We're the pitchfork people, the people you see at the side of the road cleaning up something you can't quite identify as you drive past. We're the lawn care people, and you've never asked what we use in the spray that keeps the grass so green. We're the people with the unmarked white trailer parked outside of your neighbor's house for three days, and you never see us move anything in or out of it but you know something's gone terribly wrong and you don't want to know, so you don't think of it, never think of it again. We're the people who clean up the mess so you don't have to. We do it for you; we're here to protect you from knowing.
Who are we?

TGRR
We're the night time people.  We're the people who come in the night.  Remember Janis Joplin and Captain Kangaroo and that nice old man that used to live down the street?  Neither do we, because we're the clean-up people...We clean your neighborhood, and remove unsightly and unprofitable people who say things that make you think about things that you'd rather just ignore.
Who are we?

SYLPH
We are the legion worshippers of magnaninous blood splattered Eris, she who set in motion certain events leading to the burning of Troy because nobody invited her to the party. Unsurprisingly, we don't get invited to a lot of parties. Inevitably, horrible things keep happening to you. Fair's Fair.
Who are we?

BAD BEAST
We are the reviled, the deliberately misunderstood, the veterans of a truth so savage, the telling of which can send the strongest of men retreating into an ever increasing catatonia, that some never walk out from.
We are the witnesses of the last honest man, and we carry his words, imprinted across the inside of our eyelids, lest we forget.
The Guardians of a path so hard to find, that only the soles of our feet know the direction it takes.

That's who we are

The trail of our broken and discarded dreams show where we have passed.
We are greeted as Heroes by strangers, strangers who would avail themselves of out particular talents.

Then we are held up as Saviours, for maybe a week, and tales of us are sent out into the lands, because always we are known, every town finds time to cheer us and welcome us, until the job's done.
although nothing's ever said, no-one mourns our absence when it's time to move on.

That, is also who we are.

A thousand Wars, and myriad deaths these hands have delivered.
Not for glory, or honour, or any moral holding of ideas, but because, quite simply, ithat's what we do. But the toll of death weighs heavily upon us, we never kill lightly.
But we do it with such professional excellence that none other can compete. So gather around, you're quite safe, please feel free to ask questions from the FAQ books you were issued during your trip, and our mod team will be happy to take questions by PM, relating to any matters deemed "too sensitive" to tell in polite company. (Confessional confidence is, of course expected of us)

That's who we are.

 But never seek to use subterfuge, or attempt to deceive us, for this you will be flayed of your skin, and the red flag of your hide shall adorn our tree of skinnings, while your slick,wet body screams defiance, then pleas, then just sobs from the anthill your broken, bleeding carcasse shall laid upon.

That's who we are. 
ECH
We're the Giving People. We're all about giving you more of what you want in quantities you can't possibly need. We're going to force-feed your head until you've got mental fois gras coming out your ears. We're committed to rekindling your commitment to Sparkle Motion. We do these things and more, at prices you can barely almost afford, because we KNOW in our HEARTS that too much is NEVER enough.

Who are we?

We're the providers. We'll tell you what you want while we give you what you need and tell you that you can trade it in as a 20% down payment on what you want. We're the Pay-It-Forward People. You'll never notice how hard we're fucking you in the ass because we've made sure that you'll be too busy buggering someone else while we're doing it. It feels good to give, doesn't it?

Who are we?

We're the Growing People. We've counteracted the recession with our innovative hiring practices. We know how to get more done with less, and we're making you know how as well. Spreading the message and teaching the methods, that's our way. More jobs for less wages. We're the Efficiency People. We won't need to replace you with a robot because we can replace you with 3 part-time Yous for less money.

Who are we?
CAINAD
We're the Opportunity People. It's our pleasure to hook you up with a loan for that thing you desperately need. After all, we know that it can't ALL be fun and games and fifty-two-inch High Definition TVs, though we do our best. That 50 grand you need to get through college another year or two? No problem at all, friend. We know you'll be around for a long, long time, and you'll have plenty of opportunities to pay us back, whether or not you feel like buying food that month. We're so eager to share this money with you, we'll drop you the cash for a brand-spanking-new $500,000 house at a barely-noticeable down payment, hardly any questions asked!
Who are we?


JOH’NYX
We're the Virtuous Crusaders, that know what's best for you and know that sacrifices need to be done if things will be as we envision them. Those 30,000 died so that we can still go to church and not feel indignant that our fellow brothers are getting high instead of being productive, so that we can stare right into our children's eyes and say "They all died to get you a better future, you should be grateful". And you will be grateful, or else.

Who are we?

NIGEL
We're the Opinion People. It's our job to think, so you don't have to. We understand that the burdens of work, family, church, and making those loan payments on time are already enough without the added stress of having to come up with a position on the latest public events; that's why we're here to tell you not only what to think, but how to think it. Don't you worry; everything is going to be just fine. We have people on it. The food is perfectly safe, and the economy is just about to turn around. Studies show that working multiple part-time jobs is good for your health, and medical insurance is really just an unnecessary luxury for effete ivory-tower left-wing bleeding-heart liberals. A sixpack or two after work is a good way to relax and watching TV supports our economy. If you're worried, depressed, anxious, can't sleep, or suffer from cold sweats, poverty, headaches, impotence, or blurred vision, just mention us to your doctor by name.

Who are we?

HOOPLA
We're the Starfuckers.  It's our job to pry into the deepest corners of the lives of those who choose to entertain us.  We pay them to entertain us, and they do entertain us, but they owe us.  They owe us more.  They owe us their personal details, they owe us their intimate moments, they owe us their opinions, they owe us their soul.  We know that they are both bizarre and alien to us and yet exactly like us... they snort ground hedgehogs off the foreheads of midgets while fucking petrified octopus but they also shop at Target - just! like! us!  They also wear sweatpants and consume Big Macs and drive drunk and shoot their wives - there but for the grace of Judy Garland go all of us.  We create social networks, ostensibly to keep in touch with our "friends", but really to trick the gods of Hollywood to tell us how heavy their latest bowel movement was, or how often they clean lint from their bellybuttons, they owe us at least that much.  We paid for their mansions, we paid for their Bentley, we paid for their Mexican housekeeper, we paid for their alleged privacy, we own that privacy!  We own it!  They owe us!  They owe us!  They owe the Starfuckers, because we made them and we can break them just as easily.

Who are we?

LMNO
We're the horror junkies.  We track down the worst examples of humanity, and present it to you in snappy 12.5 minute segments.  We provide the tragedy you need, from aiplane disasters to floods in third world shitholes, tornadoes, earthquakes and famine.  We're the premium providers of impersonal pain.  But it doesn't stop there.  We're the Human Interest people.  We show you the burnouts, the fame whores, the poor-impule-control freakshows.  The megalomaniacal daddy issue fuckups, screaming for attention.  We scrape the pathetic bottom of those who bought into Warhol's prophecy, and parade them in front of you.  We're the ones who make you think these behaviors are "normal".  We're the ones who condition you into passive acceptance of evolutionary decline.

Who are we?


Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 22, 2011, 02:21:22 pm
I'm not sure what it means that I don't actually remember writing the ones attributed to me.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 22, 2011, 02:33:11 pm
I'm not sure what it means that I don't actually remember writing the ones attributed to me.

Dunno...  but, these are good stuff. 
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 22, 2011, 03:18:58 pm
Welcome aboard, Flashlight dude.  You may have by now noticed that we're a collection of insufferable jackasses.  We kind of like it that way, and we hope you do, too.  If not, you are by now asking yourself "who are these assholes?"

We're the rectum people.  We pound sand up rectums, with an efficiency only dreamed of by your grandfather's generation.  How CAN we maintain that kind of quality at such rock bottom prices?  Glad you asked.  We do it by using the technology of tomorrow on the innocent passers-by of today.  Our patented process guarantees that every grain of sand goes up, or triple your money back!

You won't see our competitors offering that kind of warranty.  No, they are ankle people.  They stop at the ankle.  We, on the other hand, insist that the knee is the FIRST acceptable stopping place of the great boot o' correction, and our complaints department are the loneliest people on Earth!  After all, when you pay your hard-earned dollar for a boot up the arse, we know you want the whole ride.

Contact our sales representatives:

Badbeast - A complete cunt of an Englishman, who exists solely to heave bricks through the windows of Maggie Thatcher's mansion.

Doktor Zero - A science experiment gone horribly wrong, she preys upon the webbed-toed dwellers of Southern Illinois.

East Coast Hustle - 169% Genuine sailor man, eats spinach and pounds Bluto into pulped meat, just because he can.

Dark Empress Nigel - She strangled Oakland.  No, that's not an obscure sports term.

Professor Cramulus - aka "The Mad Taxidermist of Upstate New York."

Freeky - She'll bend your fucking space time.

Call today.  Quantities are apparently unlimited, but why wait?  Your colon deserves the finest sifted sands from the four corners of Tucson, and we pride ourselves on our delivery!

Who are we?
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 22, 2011, 03:19:54 pm
A bunch of them start on this page:

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=29720.690
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 22, 2011, 03:22:22 pm
Oh, hey!  Thanks.

We're the upside-down people. The Chop and Scratch people. We have our ears to the ground, listening. Listening to what you're REALLY asking for. And we'll GIVE it to you. You may not have known what you were asking for, but no matter. We understand what's best. We know. Hours of research in places where the corners aren't quite right have given us... Perspective. And most importantly, Access. Never you mind how we found that "special" drawer in your closet. We like to get close with our clients. Because its the personal touch that means so much. So don't be shocked when you find that the shortness of breath that comes late at night is just our way of getting right up close. Right on top of you, you might say. Who are we?

We're the abyss people. We've turned the corner and found the abject lack of meaning that lurks behind your deepest fears. AND WE FRENCH KISSED IT.  We embraced it with all our strength, and then wrestled it to the ground, and ate it. Swallowed the nothingness, the absence, the empty-eyed forever, with a soured, bitter grimace. Because we've reached the end of the end, where not even a beginning can burst through the unending void of the universe. Because we're the next people. The before people. Who are we?

We're the HUNGRY people. We want what you have. Because we don't have it. But we want it. And you're. Of using it. You sit there, just giving it away for the most banal of reasons, and we're starting to think that you don't have any reasons to start with. So you won't be missing them. Because you don't care about them. But we do. Because we can use them. Use them to bring you the things you want. The things you ask for, when you stare into the horizon. Because that's what you asked for. To give up your responsibility. And we can make it useful. To make you a better person. Who are we?
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 22, 2011, 03:30:07 pm
Unless otherwise stated, I'll take an original author (LMNO and TGRR, so far) reposting here as permission to use it.  When I get down to doing this, I may hunt down other originators for permission if I didn't get it.  This may involve a crossbow.   :wink:
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 22, 2011, 03:40:44 pm
Unless otherwise stated, I'll take an original author (LMNO and TGRR, so far) reposting here as permission to use it.  When I get down to doing this, I may hunt down other originators for permission if I didn't get it.  This may involve a crossbow.   :wink:

Standard rules apply.  Other than that, go nuts.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 22, 2011, 05:21:03 pm
Oh hey!

I think I've only written maybe three of these, you found one and if you find the other two feel free.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Phox on December 22, 2011, 09:51:22 pm
Go ahead and use mine if you want/ I am thinking about writing a few pieces around the idea you put forth. Lets' see how it turns out.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 22, 2011, 09:53:28 pm
Please, do!  I'm looking forward to seeing what people have on this.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Pæs on December 23, 2011, 07:18:28 am
We're the honest people. Wholesome, down to earth, home-baked people individually wrapped and packaged in plastic, polystyrene and cardboard. Just like Mama used to make. We remember what Childhood™ was like, even if you don't, and we'll remind you if you let us in.

We're the innocent people. Organic. Grassroots. We're your sort of people. We're the neighbourly people, all smiles and casual greetings over the fence. Perfect little families like they show on TV to make you feel guilty for your perversions.

Don't worry, we deal in redemption.

Because we're the maintenance people. Invisible like, but we're the reason that with the push of a button, you can be immediately rewarded with what it is you crave. You're the boss, see? We're just the helpful people. People serving people. We clean and grease the tubes so things can be delivered on time, any time, all the time. It never stops.

It never stops.

We're the relentless people. Filling your subscriptions, just calling to see if you have time to take a survey and rate our service, wanted to come by and upgrade your signal, long-distance phone service, internet.

Who are we?



We're the slippery people. It's hard enough to catch a glimpse of us, so just forget about our ever meeting. We're the people who decide how much to pay and how much to charge. We'll never take anything from you unless you insist on giving it to us but we're more than happy to accommodate your decision to delegate. Let us make the difficult choices and you can sit back and enjoy the consequences.

We're the clever people. We've got all the data and we know how to make the right connections. Who you're with, where you are, what you're doing, eating, wearing, thinking but it's safe because we didn't ASK, you just started telling us. We're innovating. Extrapolating. We know what you (http://www.thenoisecast.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/facebook-like.jpg) (http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g213/05136/5748f2ec.jpg) before you do and we'll let you know in advance. We can tell you where to go, who you'll meet here. We'll alert you to your common interests, give you some ice-breakers because life shouldn't have to be so much effort.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Pæs on December 23, 2011, 07:18:57 am
Who are we? is a fantastic way to respond to FACEBOOK IS CHANGING WITHOUT TELLING ME, too.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 23, 2011, 02:45:41 pm
Gotten a couple of interesting pieces already via email, thanks!

For those sending through email, if you wish attribution, I'll need to know what name to use.

My current plan (and this is my first time, be gentle) is to assemble it, toss it on a website, link from here, and let y'all look it over.  If I miss an attribution, don't kill me, I'll add it, promise.   :)

Pieces about individuals will be run by those individuals for opinions before inclusion.  If you hate the piece, I won't use it.  If there is something in a piece that, say, you think gives too much personal info, let me know.  We'll work it out.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: AFK on December 23, 2011, 03:09:57 pm
We're the people waiting for you to go first.  We talk a good game but never throw down.  We praise your good ideas and exhalt your plans.  We'll be right there behind you!  Well, actually, right after we wash our hair.  Then we're right there with you!  Oh, well, no, we have to renew our gym membership, I mean, it's gonna be a new year, we're going to hit the stair climbers for sure this year!  Then, we'll be ripped and ready to fight the good fight along side you...oh wait, we just remembered we need to clean up the hard drive.  That shouldn't take too long, and then, holy fuck are we ready to rumble!!!  Well, we probably should get a new bottle of asprin first.  We might get a headache while trying to fight The Man.  Go on ahead, we'll be there eventually, really, trust us, who are we? -- Rev. What's-His-Name? 
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: BadBeast on December 23, 2011, 03:19:02 pm
I couldn't remember writing that at all.

We are the reviled, the deliberately misunderstood, the veterans of a truth so savage, the telling of which can send the strongest of men retreating into an ever increasing catatonia, that some never walk out from.
We are the witnesses of the last honest man, and we carry his words, imprinted across the inside of our eyelids, lest we forget.
The Guardians of a path so hard to find, that only the soles of our feet know the direction it takes.

That's who we are

The trail of our broken and discarded dreams show where we have passed.
We are greeted as Heroes by strangers, strangers who would avail themselves of out particular talents.

Then we are held up as Saviours, for maybe a week, and tales of us are sent out into the lands, because always we are known, every town finds time to cheer us and welcome us, until the job's done.
But although nothing's ever said, no-one mourns our absence when it's time to move on.

That is also who we are.

A thousand Wars, and myriad deaths these hands have delivered.
Not for glory, or honour, or any moral holding of ideas,  but because quite simply, ithat's what we do. But because the toll of death weighs heavily upon us, we never kill lightly.

But we do it with such professional excellence, that none other can compete.

So gather around, you're quite safe please,  feel free to ask questions from the FAQ books you were issued during your trip, our mod team will be happy to take questions by PM, relating to any matters deemed "too sensitive" to tell in polite company. (Confessional confidence is, of course expected of us.)

That's who we are.

 But never seek to use subterfuge, or attempt to deceive us, for this,  you will be flayed of your skin, and the red flag of your hide shall adorn our tree of skinnings, while your slick, wet body screams defiance, then pleas, then just sobs from the anthill your broken, bleeding carcasse shall  be laid upon.

That's who we are.
 

Then I read it again, and I kinda could remember. Now, I'm remembering stuff that I didn't write, but should have done.

Anyway, if it claims to be mine,  then it prolly is, so if you want it, take it and pimp it til it's tits stop squeaking.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Triple Zero on December 23, 2011, 04:05:07 pm
Because the search is broken, I queried the database for "who are we" and dumped it here:

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/who-are-we.html

still took over an hour to format it and as you can see there's lots of false positives too, but maybe someone else can go over it and distill the good ones?

they're sorted by dates, a link to the original post (in thread context) is below every post and there's lots of horrific toolboxes in the old stuff. ENJOY
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Luna on December 23, 2011, 04:09:06 pm
Because the search is broken, I queried the database for "who are we" and dumped it here:

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/who-are-we.html

still took over an hour to format it and as you can see there's lots of false positives too, but maybe someone else can go over it and distill the good ones?

they're sorted by dates, a link to the original post (in thread context) is below every post and there's lots of horrific toolboxes in the old stuff. ENJOY

Trip, you are awesome, and I adore you.  I'll rummage through it.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Triple Zero on December 23, 2011, 04:51:29 pm
If you just ctrl-F/Find Next for "who are we" through it, you'll sort out the true positives soon enough.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 23, 2011, 06:58:08 pm
Because the search is broken, I queried the database for "who are we" and dumped it here:

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/who-are-we.html

still took over an hour to format it and as you can see there's lots of false positives too, but maybe someone else can go over it and distill the good ones?

they're sorted by dates, a link to the original post (in thread context) is below every post and there's lots of horrific toolboxes in the old stuff. ENJOY

Cool!
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Hoser McRhizzy on December 24, 2011, 04:23:28 pm
On your way to find yourself, you found the last stronghold of unmediated humans.  Hi!  We're the authentic people, and through us, you'll finally experience yourself.  You're about to learn that words like real, genuine and yes, even pure don't have to carry all that weighty self-referential irony you've been dragging around. 

Pre-scripted re-cited formulaic interactions just won't do at all, 'cause we're here to teach you who you are without your hero stories and semi-obscure pop culture references.  And when you pick up what we're laying down, you're going to have the first free-flowing unmediated truly original conversation you've ever had.  As long as you're with us, you'll learn that there is no script and you're certainly no character. 

Authenticity.  Pure interaction, real and genuine, we've got all the flavours of human immediacy here for you to sample.  Yes, you've finally found us!  Welcome home.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 24, 2011, 04:55:23 pm
Unmedicated?

I'm pretty sure you're not talking about here.  :lulz:
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Don Coyote on December 24, 2011, 06:11:54 pm
Who are we?
We are the people in front of you with 30 items in the 15 items or less lane, paying with a checkbook.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: BadBeast on December 25, 2011, 05:42:32 am
Who are we?
We are the people, who realise that even the word "people" makes a distinction that you hadn't previously considered.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: BadBeast on December 25, 2011, 05:56:03 am
Who are we?
We are the World, we are the children. We are the ones who make a better day, so let's start giving!(http://i748.photobucket.com/albums/xx128/ChuckFukmuk/Landover%20emotes/rofl.gif)
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 25, 2011, 03:48:47 pm
We are, in fact, the droids you are looking for.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: BadBeast on December 25, 2011, 05:45:29 pm
But we are not however, the droids you thought you were looking for.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: EK WAFFLR on December 25, 2011, 08:33:31 pm
Who are we?
We are the ones who drink all your booze, steal your shoes, and rearrange your living room.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: BadBeast on December 25, 2011, 09:03:20 pm
Who are we?
We are the Instigators, the black hand of history, and we drive everywhere in white Fiat Unos.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 26, 2011, 02:28:01 am
We're the getting lazy with the joke people.  We take a fairly sinister collection of information-void paragraphs and reduce them to a one-liner, because that's all you have time for in this busy, workaday world.  You know you don't need more than that...It might cause you to have ideas, like people in tiny countries have.  And let's face it, if these ideas were worth anything, those countries would be big and strong like ours, and everyone with ideas would be beaten by the police in their indefinite detention cells.  So we keep them simple.  Short.  Appealing.

Who are we?
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: BadBeast on December 26, 2011, 04:54:07 am
Who are we?
We are the sideways people, who slip between the spaces of your World, fucking with your reality tunnels.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: LMNO on December 26, 2011, 05:05:51 am
We're the getting lazy with the joke people.  We take a fairly sinister collection of information-void paragraphs and reduce them to a one-liner, because that's all you have time for in this busy, workaday world.  You know you don't need more than that...It might cause you to have ideas, like people in tiny countries have.  And let's face it, if these ideas were worth anything, those countries would be big and strong like ours, and everyone with ideas would be beaten by the police in their indefinite detention cells.  So we keep them simple.  Short.  Appealing.

Who are we?

Guilty.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Pæs on December 26, 2011, 10:42:02 am
We're the getting lazy with the joke people.  We take a fairly sinister collection of information-void paragraphs and reduce them to a one-liner, because that's all you have time for in this busy, workaday world.  You know you don't need more than that...It might cause you to have ideas, like people in tiny countries have.  And let's face it, if these ideas were worth anything, those countries would be big and strong like ours, and everyone with ideas would be beaten by the police in their indefinite detention cells.  So we keep them simple.  Short.  Appealing.

Who are we?

We're the soundbite people, selling Truth Abridged™, pre-processed, pre-chewed, regurgitated data. We're the pruning people, the précis people. Trust us, we've combed through the facts and we've picked out the ones you need and reduced them to bite-sized morsels for your consumption. Acronymised and abbreviated because it's tl;dr and there are more important things that require your immediate attention.
You can take it in at a glance, during the ad-break, and not have to risk missing a moment of your favourite shows, thanks to our patented White Swan Lossy Data Compression system which we run the Truth™ through, not once, not twice but a grand total of FIVE times before sending it to you! Want something a little more satisfying? No trouble! Simply add your own narrative and the facts swell back up to their original size*.

We're the Discordianism is One Sentence people, undermining our own message in its delivery. We're proving that not only can complexity emerge from simple rulesets but simplicity can bubble up from chaos, too.

Who are we?

*Full terms and conditions available at http://bit.ly/umZ7Ii
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Placid Dingo on December 26, 2011, 10:48:47 am
Sone of the biogrqphis at the end of failwhale may be good;

http://www.scribd.com/mobile/documents/70227073/download?commit=Download+Now&secret_password=
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: EK WAFFLR on December 26, 2011, 03:36:31 pm
We are the ones who have grown tired of the rage, the rampant butthurt that has infested our world like SuperAIDS. We are the ones who challenge the status quo by lounging against the machine, the ones who try furiously to be happy, life-loving people while wathcing the rest of mankind drown in their own pathetic misère. We are the ascot-wearing, silk-robe sporting, pipe smoking men and women who have realised that people who point at you with aforementioned pipe are always correct.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 26, 2011, 04:42:29 pm
We are the ones who have grown tired of the rage, the rampant butthurt that has infested our world like SuperAIDS. We are the ones who challenge the status quo by lounging against the machine, the ones who try furiously to be happy, life-loving people while wathcing the rest of mankind drown in their own pathetic misère. We are the ascot-wearing, silk-robe sporting, pipe smoking men and women who have realised that people who point at you with aforementioned pipe are always correct.

Still not doing it quite right.

It originally comes from this:

Got a problem? Bring it to the Friendly People. People touching people. People rubbing against people. People developing the nuclear first-strike capability to incinerate people. Sound like a flash in the pan? lt's gotta be: you don't settle for less. You don't have to. You're you. And you've got needs bigger and more earth-shaking than your grandfather could've dreamed. How do we keep bringing them to you, year after year, bigger and better?

By using the technology of tomorrow on the consumers of today. The Now People. People on the go. Going from Smart Shopper to New Low Value in the time it takes to dial our number. And you know which one that is! Call now won't you? For more of what you've come to expect from us. Style. Mood. A certain dependable kind of image. An image of the way you'd like people to be. Passive. Pretty. White. As white as the complexion of our finest women, grown right here by our special process. As white as the hair of God, white as it was in life! As white as the blank sheet on which we write your mind. Who are we?

We're the Happy People. Happy to live in a world of images. Images of war. Family. Crime. Fun images, that help rinse away unsightly self-images, so you can get away from the privacy of your own home. After all, aren't you what everything's here for? You're what we're here for. That's why we made everything! That's why everything made you. And that's why you made us. Who are we?

We're the Money People. People who take your money. No more money hassling! But what about little Dickie, you sap What's little Dickie gonna do, when you're working late, and Wilma's minding the fort, and Sis is in and out? Put away those straps and buckles: Dickie's safe with usl (He's even learning to speak again, our way.) Safe with the people who know what it is you want from a world. Simplicity. Reliability. A world you can go to, without worrying about whether your money is safe.

You know, when we first got into this business we didn't know much more than you. Like you, we thought there was a world out there: a world of value. A world that needed meaning. Love. Beauty. A world that needed a better product. Uh-uh. There's just you. And you want to know something. You want to know just exactly what it is you're suppposed to do. You don't care why, just so long as it's the right thing. It's natural. Everyone wants to do the right thing. But sometimes it's hard to know just what the right thing is. Let's say you're Black. And you've just lost your arms and legs defending U.S. interests in Afghanistan. You come home, and get thrown in jail for life for beating up four white cops. You want to know: just exactly what is it l'm supposed to feel?, We can't give you all the answers. But we can help flesh out your fantasy that there are some. At our labs, we use only the finest homemade ingredients. Love. Children. God. And the purest blend of money your needs can buy, grown right here by our special process! A process in use since our first Mom and Pop operation. Who are we?

We're the Normal People. The most normal. people in the world. But not quite as normal as you. Why? You're unique. It's natural: everyone's unique. But you stand apart from the crowd: you're normal. Normal as a typical herd of Sea Cow. Normal as an exploding stellar nebula. Normal as the world in which we live. And what could be more normal than that? Certainly not the competition! How do we stay so far out in front of the pack? By building a racetrack-decoy ideology with the pick-up of a domestic, and the maneuverability of an import! Who are we?

We're the Information People. The people who provide you with the information you need, to help you through your busy day. Information about divorce. Inflation. Drug abuse. Information vital to your survival, because information is the most important part of our world. In fact, it's the only part. Information like light. Living things. Information between neurons. Fast-breaking genetic information, information you'd be hard pressed to do without! Information you simply can't get anywhere else, at a vaIue no one can underprice.

Let's try this little test. Compare. A glass of the, leading competitor's product. Our product. You can see the difference. Now some people would say, "This glass is empty." But other people would say, "This glass hasn't been filled yet, but when it has, I'll like what's in it!" Those are the people we're looking for. The people who look on the bright side. The people who want to like things. And that's what life's all about, isn't it: liking?    

You want to like as many things as you can. You want to have as many things as you can. It's natural. Everyone does. But not everyone feels that way. Some people don't want to like things. The people who aren't good enough to have them! People from unfurnished countries. People who have smudged skin. People who have sex with males. The people who want to ruin everything. They want the things you like, but they're not willing to do the work you need to have done to get them! When they do your work, and they get them. They just use them for their own purposes. But you don't. You don't say "my purposes." You say "our purposes." And who are we?    

We're the Big People. The people who wear three-piece suits. The people with important eyebrows. The people with sticky voices like this, voices which soothe worried minds in a world in which everyone thinks their own thoughts. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone thought your thoughts? Because let's be honest. Sure you want to be unique. It's natural. Everyone does. But you also want to be right. Until now, that meant a lot of time-consuming prayer and back-breaking contemplation; put away that neocortical washboard: no more working your neurons to the bone! Thanks to us, what was once a reality can become a dream.    

You see, we're old-fashioned. We want to go back to the old days, the days of white people, before women. The days of owning, and building, and having. Having things clean, and big, and smooth, and fast! Return with us now, won't you? To a world where people did whatever they wanted, and minded their own business. A world where everything had a purpose: yours. The world you meant to make, before the Negative People took over. The people who say no, and bad, and stop, and different, and small. The people who are negatives of you, and you know what color that is! The. people who want to start by tearing down, instead of starting like us, by building up! Who are we?

We're the Communication People. The people whose talk is strictly state-of-the-art technology. It's disposable. Reversable. Reusable with almost any brand of idea, including our deluxe line. Yours. Sound costly? Put away that semantic checkbook! Now communication can be yours for a fraction of what it cost Grandpa. Why clutter up your world with a lot of hard-to-percieve subtleties? You either like a thing or you don't. And in your case, it's the former. That's why we like you. And that's why we're always looking for quicker; easier ways to tell you so. Slogans. Jingles. Logos. Ways of reaching out and touching you, the way you want to be touched. Slightly. Who are we?    

We're the Real People. The people who make you real. So real you can almost see yourself! More real than you've ever been before. But then, you've never been at all, before us. In fact, nothing has. And not even very much of that. Not even this sentence. Because when we say disposable, we could mean Just about anything! Who are we?

We're the Other People. The people other than you. People so other we're opposite, yet so people you'd never guess we weren't the real thing! People who are almost you, but couldn't quite make the pre-season cut. People who are a little more than you, because we make the things you know you ought to be making. Things like money. Revolution. Art. Love. Things the Negative People told you were more important than what you're making now. Us. People so other we're even other than each other. So other we're even other than ourselves: you. Because you're one of us. How do we know? Nowadays there's a little more involved than just counting the arms and legs, as Grandpa did in his day! Nowadays we're a little more scientific than that. But the original formula still remains the same: you see them; they make you; you join us.

Still skeptical? Try this simple test. Look at me now. Notice anything? Now you know how we feel. Separate. Gone. Repeated. Like you, only over again. We can't help noticing. In fact, we have an old saying: "Hi." Why do we say it? It's a tradition. Like I said, we're old fashioned. We don't much care why we do the things we do, just so long as they're the right things. Because even though the newer the better, deep down inside you know the new is wrong. It's different, so it could be a mistake. If it wasn't a mistake, then why didn't it happen before? You see, we don't really want to know what we're doing: we want to know what we're supposed to do.    

That's why you're here. You take all the crazy things we do we can't even explain ourselves, and put a good, solid reason behind each and every one of them! Because you don't really care what happens: you want to know what's supposed to happen. And that's why we're here. Who are we?

We're you. You don't settle for less. You don't have to. You're you. We're nothing without you. And within you. And someday, you'll be nothing too. Don't you think it's time you said "hi"? Call now. You remember our number! Void where prohibited: everywhere! Hurry while the customer lasts. Supply is limited. In fact, we have an old saying: bye-bye.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: EK WAFFLR on December 26, 2011, 05:49:48 pm
That was amazing.
Thanks for the lesson, TGRR!
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 26, 2011, 05:53:53 pm
That was amazing.
Thanks for the lesson, TGRR!

Forgot to attribute, because everyone here knows who wrote it.

It was written by a guy named Michael Peppe, back in 1981 (which makes the Afghanistan reference pretty fucking cool).  We've been working on a 2012 Ad...But there's a certain "formula", if the whole thing is to fit together.
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: EK WAFFLR on December 26, 2011, 06:00:31 pm
That was amazing.
Thanks for the lesson, TGRR!

Forgot to attribute, because everyone here knows who wrote it.

It was written by a guy named Michael Peppe, back in 1981 (which makes the Afghanistan reference pretty fucking cool).  We've been working on a 2012 Ad...But there's a certain "formula", if the whole thing is to fit together.

Oh, alright. Googling Peppe nao.

But thanks anyway, for showing it to me. I'll try my best to stick to the formula. :)
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Phox on March 22, 2012, 04:51:57 am
Bump. Came across some of the pieces i submitted to this and kind of want to post them. What is status?  :lulz:
Title: Re: Who Are We?
Post by: Placid Dingo on March 22, 2012, 06:30:12 am
Reread the op; I think that the 'who are we' stuff missed the point. This wad meant to be a broad collection of ideas about who we are as a community.

One that I sent by email is here;

Discordia and the Kiersly Test

Results in this article taken from a PD thread on the Myer-Briggs test.

Of the 84 Discordians who answered the Myer-Briggs test, 55 were identified as NT type, or what Kiersly calls Promethians. Interestingly the most common type; INTP, only represents between 1 and 3% of the general population. In our sample they represented 35% of our population. [technically this would be slightly lower; since I gave my poll result I've shifted to INTJ].  
Some things about NTs as suggested by David Kiersly;
An NT is motivated by the need to gain power over the natural world through knowledge.
Frequently sarcastic.
Abstract in communication (including use of abstract language an wordplay such as -surprise surprise- puns.)
Often goal based.
Enjoys and is good at developing strategy.

25 were NF types, or Apollonian. NFs are feelers. Keirsly defines their key motivation as self-actualisation. They...
Often find work in mentoring or advocating.
They are characteristically emotional, and are quick to display emotion.
They often come to conclusions through feelings or intuition, unlike NTs who almost worship logic.
They value social cohesion.
Like NTs they are similarly abstract as communicators.

Only two identified as SJs, seeking to earn acceptance from a group (Epimethean).

Only two of us identified as SPs, pleasure/freedom seekers (Dionysian).





Luna can speak for herself but I think that this is the kind of thing she was soliciting, alongside the 'who are we' pieces.