Counterpoint: Music is a Game, Let Them Play

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Sinead O'Connor, Nothing Compares 2U.

Incorrect. This video does not include any highly choreographed dance numbers, no back up dancers, and the costumes and makeup are not sufficiently wacky. Also, Sinead does not smile all the time.

But that woman Gomez hardly ever smiles in that song, either!

Maybe the rule should be corrected to "Either smile or pout all the time"

Smile all the time does not apply to the video, but irl. Sinead does not smile all the time in interviews and whatnot.

[Dildo Argentino]

Sinead O'Connor, Nothing Compares 2U.

Incorrect. This video does not include any highly choreographed dance numbers, no back up dancers, and the costumes and makeup are not sufficiently wacky. Also, Sinead does not smile all the time.

But that woman Gomez hardly ever smiles in that song, either!

Maybe the rule should be corrected to "Either smile or pout all the time"

Smile all the time does not apply to the video, but irl. Sinead does not smile all the time in interviews and whatnot.

Aha! Makes sense. Smile on PR occasions, pout in videos, then? Sorry, I can't think of an example, I only ever catch glimpses in public places with the tv on.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

It's fine, the example thing was just so i would stop grabbing them. Basically anything from Britney Spears and Cristina Aguilera's catalogs fit, along with earlier Miley Cyrus, Nikki Minaj is arguable (she's not playing the right type of music, but otherwise spot on for the game), Katy Perry (most of the time), I don't know who this Ariana Grande chick is, but this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJuWlMFToNo looks like she's playing the game, too.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

Let's talk about one game in particular: Cocktease.

Cocktease has its roots set in Sexy Rock, while borrowing some rules from Fuck Music Just Dance, Sad Pretty Girl With Guitar, and Selling Sex to Little Girls (among others).

The rules of Cocktease are as follows:
     > Be a pretty young girl/woman
     > Sing about sex
     > Express regret that you are not sexually available to your listeners
     > Music videos are required
     > Videos must include highly choreographed dances with no less than a dozen participants in bizarre settings (ideally multiple sets per video), multiple costumes, and at least one set of crazy hair/make up
     > Songs must include strong hooks and follow all other "radio pop" rules (3-5 min, verse chorus verse, etc.)
     > Smile all the time
     > Don't be sexually available to anyone

Here is Selina Gomez, playing the game: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-D1EB74Ckg

The lyrics:

You ain't gotta worry, it's an open invitation
I'll be sittin' right here, real patient
All day, all night, I'll be waitin' standby
Can't stop because I love it, hate the way I love you
All day, all night, maybe I'm addicted for life, no lie.

I'm not too shy to show I love you, I got no regrets.
I love you much, too much to hide you, this love ain't finished yet.
This love ain't finished yet...
So baby whenever you're ready...

When you're ready come and get it
Na na na na

You got the kind of love that I want, let me get that. (Let me get that yeah)
And baby once I get it, I'm yours no take backs.
Gon' love you for life, I ain't leaving your side
Even if you knock it, ain't no way to stop it
Forever you're mine, baby I'm addicted, no lie, no lie.

I assure you, that's the entirety of the lyrics, just left out the bits that repeat endlessly.

This video won awards.

Here's Britney Spears, playing the game: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CduA0TULnow

The lyrics:

I think I did it again
I made you believe we're more than just friends
Oh baby
It might seem like a crush
But it doesn't mean that I'm serious
'Cause to lose all my senses
That is just so typically me
Oh baby, baby

[CHORUS:]
Oops!...I did it again
I played with your heart, got lost in the game
Oh baby, baby
Oops!...You think I'm in love
That I'm sent from above
I'm not that innocent

You see my problem is this
I'm dreaming away
Wishing that heroes, they truly exist
I cry, watching the days
Can't you see I'm a fool in so many ways
But to lose all my senses
That is just so typically me

Again, just deleted stuff that's repeated (and a small spoken section).



For your homework, come up with one more example of a female artist playing Cocktease. Next, we'll compare and contrast these examples to "Wrecking Ball" and "We Can't Stop."

Does this count? 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQa7SvVCdZk

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Yes, I'm pretty sure that counts

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Based on the OP, I'm glad to see that my point in my thread was completely missed or ignored.

[Ben Shapiro]

Based on the OP, I'm glad to see that my point in my thread was completely missed or ignored.

Music prevents me from De-evolving back to a inbred savage?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Based on the OP, I'm glad to see that my point in my thread was completely missed or ignored.

Music prevents me from De-evolving back to a inbred savage?

Apparently, the counterpoint is that all music is music.  Which I apparently denied at some point.

I must have been drunk, though, because I don't remember that shit at all.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Based on the OP, I'm glad to see that my point in my thread was completely missed or ignored.

Music prevents me from De-evolving back to a inbred savage?

Apparently, the counterpoint is that all music is music.  Which I apparently denied at some point.

I must have been drunk, though, because I don't remember that shit at all.

It was an error in my reading of your first post, the idea that stuff gets old and needs to be demolished and anything that's not PUNK AS FUCK (whatever that means this generation) isn't worth playing. It came across (to me) as very AUTHENTIC MUSIC OR GTFO, like what holist was later arguing. Your second post made it clear that you weren't saying old shit isn't music, just that new shit needs to be included too. Sorry I missed the point the first go round.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Based on the OP, I'm glad to see that my point in my thread was completely missed or ignored.

Music prevents me from De-evolving back to a inbred savage?

Apparently, the counterpoint is that all music is music.  Which I apparently denied at some point.

I must have been drunk, though, because I don't remember that shit at all.

It was an error in my reading of your first post, the idea that stuff gets old and needs to be demolished and anything that's not PUNK AS FUCK (whatever that means this generation) isn't worth playing. It came across (to me) as very AUTHENTIC MUSIC OR GTFO, like what holist was later arguing. Your second post made it clear that you weren't saying old shit isn't music, just that new shit needs to be included too. Sorry I missed the point the first go round.

S'ok.  In fact, one of my central points has been that "authenticity" is more or less a completely bullshit catagory.  It was written because RWHN had been insisting that certain forms of music, etc, didn't count, and basically for the same reason Holist was getting at with the authenticity thing.

[Ben Shapiro]

Based on the OP, I'm glad to see that my point in my thread was completely missed or ignored.

Music prevents me from De-evolving back to a inbred savage?

Apparently, the counterpoint is that all music is music.  Which I apparently denied at some point.

I must have been drunk, though, because I don't remember that shit at all.

It was an error in my reading of your first post, the idea that stuff gets old and needs to be demolished and anything that's not PUNK AS FUCK (whatever that means this generation) isn't worth playing. It came across (to me) as very AUTHENTIC MUSIC OR GTFO, like what holist was later arguing. Your second post made it clear that you weren't saying old shit isn't music, just that new shit needs to be included too. Sorry I missed the point the first go round.

S'ok.  In fact, one of my central points has been that "authenticity" is more or less a completely bullshit catagory.  It was written because RWHN had been insisting that certain forms of music, etc, didn't count, and basically for the same reason Holist was getting at with the authenticity thing.

That means Nirvana is utter shit because their white and male, and not to shut up about having a "hard life". But not to RWHN, see there's hidden gold.