9 Ridiculous Cooking Myths You Probably Believe (Cracked)

[East Coast Hustle]

If you order a good steak cooked past medium rare, you should probably just go eat at Denny's, or stop at Safeway and get some london broil to take home. There's a reason the crappy end cuts are the ones that get labeled "save for well".

In 15 years as a professional cook, from mass-produced pizza and roadside clam shacks to a private island eco-resort off the coast of Maine, exactly once has someone asked for a temp on a pork chop, and that was just the obnoxious guy who orders temps on EVERYTHING (even steamed lobster) for the sole purpose of being obnoxious.

[Kai]

And anyone who thinks that sous vide is an acceptable method of cooking meat should probably never tell me that in person. It's the 2nd quickest way to get me to start a fistfight for no good reason.

I told my father about sous vide recently. He's a long time food microbiologist and quality manager for one of the largest food manufacturing companies in the country. He said that it sounded incredibly risky, and that he wouldn't touch it with a 10 foot pole.

Then he wouldn't eat at many of the finest restaurants in the world. If any of you are really interested in the subject I suggest reading Thomas Kellers "Under Pressure".

He would be fine with that. Sous-vide cooks meat for extended periods far below 165 F. And the risk under those aerobic conditions is botulism. Not worth the risk.

Also, "finest restaurants in the world" is an utterly pretentious delineation. By who's standards? IMO, I can eat at the "finest restaurant in the world" in my own kitchen, by my own hands, exactly the thing I wanted to cram down my maw. Even better, because there's no risk for food poisoning. You sound like a gourmand.

[Freeky]

And anyone who thinks that sous vide is an acceptable method of cooking meat should probably never tell me that in person. It's the 2nd quickest way to get me to start a fistfight for no good reason.

I told my father about sous vide recently. He's a long time food microbiologist and quality manager for one of the largest food manufacturing companies in the country. He said that it sounded incredibly risky, and that he wouldn't touch it with a 10 foot pole.

Then he wouldn't eat at many of the finest restaurants in the world. If any of you are really interested in the subject I suggest reading Thomas Kellers "Under Pressure".

He would be fine with that. Sous-vide cooks meat for extended periods far below 165 F. And the risk under those aerobic conditions is botulism. Not worth the risk.

Also, "finest restaurants in the world" is an utterly pretentious delineation. By who's standards? IMO, I can eat at the "finest restaurant in the world" in my own kitchen, by my own hands, exactly the thing I wanted to cram down my maw. Even better, because there's no risk for food poisoning. You sound like a gourmand.

For serious.  Cannot tell if troll or srs, but its really, really funny.

[Kai]

And anyone who thinks that sous vide is an acceptable method of cooking meat should probably never tell me that in person. It's the 2nd quickest way to get me to start a fistfight for no good reason.

I told my father about sous vide recently. He's a long time food microbiologist and quality manager for one of the largest food manufacturing companies in the country. He said that it sounded incredibly risky, and that he wouldn't touch it with a 10 foot pole.

Then he wouldn't eat at many of the finest restaurants in the world. If any of you are really interested in the subject I suggest reading Thomas Kellers "Under Pressure".

He would be fine with that. Sous-vide cooks meat for extended periods far below 165 F. And the risk under those aerobic conditions is botulism. Not worth the risk.

Also, "finest restaurants in the world" is an utterly pretentious delineation. By who's standards? IMO, I can eat at the "finest restaurant in the world" in my own kitchen, by my own hands, exactly the thing I wanted to cram down my maw. Even better, because there's no risk for food poisoning. You sound like a gourmand.

For serious.  Cannot tell if troll or srs, but its really, really funny.

Your reading comprehension is not my problem.

[Freeky]

Your reading comprehension is not my problem.

  Sorry.

[Kai]

Your reading comprehension is not my problem.

  Sorry.

Dammit, thought I was responding to DEC14. I took it as a sarcastic comment, but I know you wouldn't mean it that way. And yes, I was serious. I don't need any high maintenance expensive restaurants to eat well.

[Freeky]

Your reading comprehension is not my problem.

  Sorry.

Dammit, thought I was responding to DEC14. I took it as a sarcastic comment, but I know you wouldn't mean it that way. And yes, I was serious. I don't need any high maintenance expensive restaurants to eat well.

I was agreeing with you about DECI4.  Your comment makes sense now, though.   

[East Coast Hustle]

I'm guessing he's never even actually worked at a real restaurant. Probably spends alot of time in his basement masturbating to Top Chef, though.

[Phox]

I'm guessing he's never even actually worked at a real restaurant. Probably spends alot of time in his basement masturbating to Top Chef, though.

Well, who doesn't do that?



(I mean, it's normal, right?)












((Right?))

[East Coast Hustle]

Thing is, Phox, we rub it out to Top Chef because of Padma Lakshmi or Gail Simmons (or maybe even Tom Colicchio, and DEFINITELY Eric Ripert when he makes a guest appearance).

DECI4 just watches season 2 over and over and snaps it off every time Marcel is onscreen for more than 10 seconds.

In fact, if DECI4 really IS a chef, I wouldn't be surprised at all if it IS Marcel.

[Phox]

Thing is, Phox, we rub it out to Top Chef because of Padma Lakshmi or Gail Simmons (or maybe even Tom Colicchio, and DEFINITELY Eric Ripert when he makes a guest appearance).

DECI4 just watches season 2 over and over and snaps it off every time Marcel is onscreen for more than 10 seconds.

In fact, if DECI4 really IS a chef, I wouldn't be surprised at all if it IS Marcel.

Point. 

[LMNO]

I make FOAMS!
      \

[East Coast Hustle]

I'm actually at least a tiny bit serious about that suspicion, too. Marcel is a Bainbridge tard, and DECI4 is definitely posting from a fairly ritzy part of Pugetopolis.

And it would make sense that our first "celebrity" poster would be someone like that.

[LMNO]

Well, from what I remember from that "Battle of the Top Chef Stars" episode they did, apparently Marcel has an entourage of sycophants, so... yeah.

[East Coast Hustle]

Dear Sweet baby Jeebus....are you telling me that there are people out there who actually aspire to be like Marcel?