Stay confident as you age

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Apropos of nothing; studies indicate that, although the belief has long been that people lose influence as they get older, because people become gradually less likely to give weight to what they have to say, there is evidence that what may be happening is that as people age, their sense of confidence and self-esteem often erodes due to their reduced perception of sexual attractiveness and vitality, causing them to present themselves to others with less authority and confidence, in turn creating a self-reinforcing feedback loop wherein others respond to them according to their reduced confidence, and so on. Evidently, people who don't think people take them less seriously as they age are right, and people who do think people take them less seriously... are also right.

[Pergamos]

I think people take me more seriously as I age.  And they ought to, I have more experience now.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I think people take me more seriously as I age.  And they ought to, I have more experience now.

Well, of course it's usually true that people take adults more seriously as they move from adolescence into middle age. I am specifically referring to "older adults", who often feel that they are taken less seriously and have less influence as they move from middle age into advanced age, and their sexual viability wanes. It's easy to see why, in a society that so strongly values sexual desirability, an individual's general confidence might decline as their reproductive desirability declines.

[Pergamos]

I certainly think I am less sexually desirable than I was in my 20's.  My hair is thinning and has grey in it, my metabolism has slowed down and changed lean muscle to pudge, and the other problems that come with middle age.  But just because the women may not be as likely to want to get in bed with me doesn't change the fact that people are more likely to respect my opinion now. 

[P3nT4gR4m]

Back in the day when I stared at a hawt chick all leerily, a lot of them would stare back the same way and we'd end up fucking.

Nowadays they turn chalk white, freak out and run, and I'm all like, "yeah, you still think the hotpants and see through top were such a good idea now?"

The trick to staying confident, for me, is enjoying this newfound effect and not missing the old one so much. Looking forward to the colostomy bag - I'm gonna have so much fun with one of those

[GrannySmith]

This makes a lot of sense to me, and it reminds me a pope bob exercise... I am certain that i have more influence and beauty than i had when i was younger and i try to maintain the belief that these things improve as time goes by(watch out when I'm finally 80!!! ). i firmly believe that beauty, as is influence, is more dependent on the persons self image than on anything else.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I certainly think I am less sexually desirable than I was in my 20's.  My hair is thinning and has grey in it, my metabolism has slowed down and changed lean muscle to pudge, and the other problems that come with middle age.  But just because the women may not be as likely to want to get in bed with me doesn't change the fact that people are more likely to respect my opinion now.

The key is to, as you progress from middle-age to elderly, retain that mindset. Evidently a lot of people who are moving into senior territory start to feel like they are taken less seriously than they were in middle age, and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because they start to present themselves and their opinions more tentatively, with less confidence. However, for those who continue to believe that they are heard and that their input is valued, that effect doesn't occur.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Also, our culture has a pretty strong recurring narrative of "we don't value our elderly" that feeds into this waning confidence. I think it's important to combat that by retaining a strong and confident voice as we age.

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

I would be interested to see how the changes in society affect this.

Do elderly people feel less confident solely because of their age, or is it also impacted by the shifts in social norms, beliefs, technology etc. Is it just sexual attractiveness, or are they also less sure of themselves because the world around them has changed?

[Cainad (dec.)]

I would be interested to see how the changes in society affect this.

Do elderly people feel less confident solely because of their age, or is it also impacted by the shifts in social norms, beliefs, technology etc. Is it just sexual attractiveness, or are they also less sure of themselves because the world around them has changed?

My guess: "Yes."

[AFK]

I think this will shift as the elderly population continues to grow with aging boomers. 


Strength in numbers.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I would be interested to see how the changes in society affect this.

Do elderly people feel less confident solely because of their age, or is it also impacted by the shifts in social norms, beliefs, technology etc. Is it just sexual attractiveness, or are they also less sure of themselves because the world around them has changed?

I need to find some links and post them... I'll work on that tomorrow morning, perhaps.

[LMNO]

Perhaps that role models kick in again, as when we were younger?

I have no doubt I'll be an influential old man, because my imprint of how an old man should be is my dad, who was King Shit of Fuck Mountain, as far as I'm concerned.

[Suu]

I just figured once I have a masters degree people will actually take me seriously, because when I told myself that people would take me seriously when I got into my 30s, they didn't. 

Joking aside, I have this thing where most adults (say, 40s-50s) actually think I'm older, that I'm one of their peers, whereas many young adults in their 20s assume I'm their age or just a tad older. It's always been this way. I figure I'm aging very well (I never wear make up unless I'm in costume or it's a special occasion. I've been told by several people I don't need it and look much better without it.) but I've always been one of those kids that hung out with the grown-ups. Mom often joked that I was born 45 years old and sprang fully grown from my father's head brandishing sarcasm and a PhD.

Honestly, I just try to be myself. I have moments of extreme self-doubt, such as when I borked a final project last semester. It nearly KILLED me, but at the same time, I feel like I have a great support network to help me out of those tough spots. I figured failure would be easier to accept as you get older, but it's not.

[The Johnny]

I think that a lot of it comes from a position of power, which peaks right before retirement when one has the most experience in a given field and has underlings, then one retires and a lot of that confidence that revolved around those factors suddenly have no sustain.

Another reason not to build your entire self around your job.