Open Bar: Funnier Than White People Practicing Voodoo

[Luna]

Holy crap. Your Thursday had too much Eris. 

I think I'm all set for the rest of the year.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I'm rolling on a sleepless bender that is seriously starting to affect the quality of my thinking. I have to go to bed before 2:30am tonight, I have an all-day coast trip tomorrow.

My bank, meantime, has decided that there is no particular reason I should have access to the five grand in funds that is currently in it. So far I have called twice and they've SAID they were releasing the funds, but when I try my card, no dice.

Today for homework I have to draw and label the anatomical parts of an eye, watch three videos, and read two chapters of book. Not too bad. Sunday I'll write a couple of short essays.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Oh my god, they've finally released it. Jesus fuck!

[The Good Reverend Roger]

That moment when the wick in your vaporizer goes bad, and you suddenly understand how Rod Stewart must have felt.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

That moment when the wick in your vaporizer goes bad, and you suddenly understand how Rod Stewart must have felt.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

That moment when the wick in your vaporizer goes bad, and you suddenly understand how Rod Stewart must have felt.

No jetpacks and I apparently just fellated a robot cigarette.  Me--->   <---happy smoke

This is NOT the future I was promised.

[minuspace]

That moment when the wick in your vaporizer goes bad, and you suddenly understand how Rod Stewart must have felt.

No jetpacks and I apparently just fellated a robot cigarette.  Me--->   <---happy smoke

This is NOT the future I was promised.

Immediate redesign dispatch:
Nano-carbon honey-comb capillary filter to replace all robot cig. wicks - yesterday!

[Salty]

Why does my nose do that thing?

TELL ME!

[Salty]

So, you know the whole "if you've been divorced 17 times maybe, just maybe it's you" thing? That's sort of been tormenting me for the last few months, paralyzing me, in fact. Not that I have been divorced that many times...

It's just that after so many social failures in my life, so many places in this town I avoid so I don't run into people, so many hateful stares from people that I don't know and don't know me, well, I thought it was worth a look to see if I was the problem.

After careful, meticulous consderation I have reached the following conclusion:

FUCK THOSE GUYS.

For serious.

I may be an asshole, I may even have a knack for being REALLY NASTY, but not without cause, not JUST CUZ. No. It's not my fault I am surrounded by assholes and so desperate for social interaction that I make the wrong choices, trusting the wrong people. I have been hasty, I have been stupid, I have been a whole lot of things, not all of which I am proud of.

But that has nothing to do with the way these pigfuckers have treated me. Maybe if I was still a doormat I'd have a better reputation (prolly not). But I don't give a fuck.

Fuck with me, suffer my horrible verbal onslaught. If you can't handle that TUFF.

I have painstakingly gone through every incident involving the multitude of people that have fucked me over and declare THEM to be full of derp, and none too little herp.

[Raz Tech]

So, you know the whole "if you've been divorced 17 times maybe, just maybe it's you" thing? That's sort of been tormenting me for the last few months, paralyzing me, in fact. Not that I have been divorced that many times...

It's just that after so many failed social failures in my life, so many places in this town I avoid so I don't run into people, so many hateful stares from people that I don't know and don't know me, well, I thought it was worth a look to see if I was the problem.

After careful, meticulous consderation I have reached the following conclusion:

FUCK THOSE GUYS.

For serious.

I may be an asshole, I may even have a knack for being REALLY NASTY, but not without cause, not JUST CUZ. No. It's not my fault I am surrounded by assholes and so desperate for social interaction that I make the wrong choices, trusting the wrong people. I have been hasty, I have been stupid, I have been a whole lot of things, not all of which I am proud of.

But that has nothing to do with the way these pigfuckers have treated me. Maybe if I was still a doormat I'd have a better reputation (prolly not). But I don't give a fuck.

Fuck with me, suffer my horrible verbal onslaught. If you can't handle that TUFF.

I have painstakingly gone through every incident involving the multitude of people that have fucked me over and declare THEM to be full of derp, and none too little herp.

wait isn't a failed social failure a social win?
I think I should congratulate you but I honestly have no idea.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

So, you know the whole "if you've been divorced 17 times maybe, just maybe it's you" thing? That's sort of been tormenting me for the last few months, paralyzing me, in fact. Not that I have been divorced that many times...

It's just that after so many failed social failures in my life, so many places in this town I avoid so I don't run into people, so many hateful stares from people that I don't know and don't know me, well, I thought it was worth a look to see if I was the problem.

After careful, meticulous consderation I have reached the following conclusion:

FUCK THOSE GUYS.

For serious.

I may be an asshole, I may even have a knack for being REALLY NASTY, but not without cause, not JUST CUZ. No. It's not my fault I am surrounded by assholes and so desperate for social interaction that I make the wrong choices, trusting the wrong people. I have been hasty, I have been stupid, I have been a whole lot of things, not all of which I am proud of.

But that has nothing to do with the way these pigfuckers have treated me. Maybe if I was still a doormat I'd have a better reputation (prolly not). But I don't give a fuck.

Fuck with me, suffer my horrible verbal onslaught. If you can't handle that TUFF.

I have painstakingly gone through every incident involving the multitude of people that have fucked me over and declare THEM to be full of derp, and none too little herp.

Divorce isn't a simple thing. Nothing is. There's no such thing as black and white in practice. You may be 99% not at fault, but 1% of you is. There's nothing wrong with that. Could be that 1% has poor ability to determine the long term viability of a mate. Could be that's his or her bit too. I think you're a decent guy. I'd like to hang out with you if you weren't in that place that might as well be Russia and I can't take a subway to. I want you to be happy. I don't know what else to say there, I kinda got lost in my own hippiness.

[Salty]

Heh. Just edited that out. Also:

Congratulate the shit out of me.

I don't feel so broken anymore, which is going to be just awful for these poor shmucks. Just awful.

Thing is, when you have such a huge capacity for rage and spite AND you are surrounded by assholes, you start to forget the other parts of your self. I am kind and funny and put more effort into the smallest thing, I am considerate and patient and god damned happy. It's just that, there are so many that choose the door that says WRATH and then they look at me like I have done something wrong. Too bad.

[Salty]

Twid: It is simple though, in this case. She was a scumbag, EOS.

But yeah, I am not gonna let that keep me down. None of them. None of the scumbags.

[Suu]

Portsmouth does not have the designated weird levels of Providence and needs some fixing.

I mean, it's got its merits, which is basically beer around every corner and a lot of very old colonial architecture, but it's basically the outer most ring of Boston, whereas the outer most ring of Providence is New Bedford, though even they refuse to admit it. The one brewery we went to tonight makes only gruits (unhopped herbal beers that can be quite fucking weird) which is a start, but the only "crazy" I've seen since I've been here has been a grotesquely obese libertaritard sandwich boarding anti-Obamacare rhetoric for Jesus while nobody paid attention to him.

Fuck this, downtown is getting postergasm'd Sunday.

[Raz Tech]

Congratulate the shit out of me.

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!