Open Bar: Funnier Than White People Practicing Voodoo

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Haboob.



It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

I can't imagine why more people don't move there just for the atmospheric theatrics. I am glad you are safe and didn't get hit by lightening. Unless you wanted to, then I'm sorry you didn't.

[Luna]

Haboob.



It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

I can't imagine why more people don't move there just for the atmospheric theatrics. I am glad you are safe and didn't get hit by lightening. Unless you wanted to, then I'm sorry you didn't.

I can't imagine why, when thinking about pounds of sanded coyote shit flinging itself at my windshield, my first thought was NOT "oh, I gotta go THERE."

[Suu]

Haboob.



It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

That sounds much better than what I described. 

[Sita]

People are already doing firecrackers and poppers.
Seems they've shown some restraint this year. Last year it started at 9am.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hung out with Rude last night, first time in a while I've really gotten to spend time with him. Sometimes I forget how much I just completely love that man. I don't know if it's pheromonal or what, I just absolutely, viscerally adore him. I probably get a huge rush of dopamine just from seeing him. He showed up and I was all, OH YEAH, THAT! SQUEEEE!!!!

[LMNO]

This reminds me, I need to get margarita mix. You cannot in good faith have a hurricane come within a couple hundred miles without drinking margaritas. It's bad luck.

Wimp.  Buy three pounds of citrus, and make it yourself. 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Hung out with Rude last night, first time in a while I've really gotten to spend time with him. Sometimes I forget how much I just completely love that man. I don't know if it's pheromonal or what, I just absolutely, viscerally adore him. I probably get a huge rush of dopamine just from seeing him. He showed up and I was all, OH YEAH, THAT! SQUEEEE!!!!

Had a GF like that.  30 years later, the sight of her still does all manner of rotten shit to the inside of my skull.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Haboob.



It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

I can't imagine why more people don't move there just for the atmospheric theatrics. I am glad you are safe and didn't get hit by lightening. Unless you wanted to, then I'm sorry you didn't.

I can't imagine why, when thinking about pounds of sanded coyote shit flinging itself at my windshield, my first thought was NOT "oh, I gotta go THERE."

The best part is that a haboob is not an instantaneous event.  It's more like someone aimed a sandblaster into a sandbox.  It lasts however long it lasts.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Haboob.



It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

I can't imagine why more people don't move there just for the atmospheric theatrics. I am glad you are safe and didn't get hit by lightening. Unless you wanted to, then I'm sorry you didn't.

I can't imagine why, when thinking about pounds of sanded coyote shit flinging itself at my windshield, my first thought was NOT "oh, I gotta go THERE."

The best part is that a haboob is not an instantaneous event.  It's more like someone aimed a sandblaster into a sandbox.  It lasts however long it lasts.

I think I was in one, once. Around 1994. It sucked, because we couldn't DRIVE.

[minuspace]

This is very exciting.  I promised my herpetology club that I would go to Yuma once the summer rains start.  Is it time yet?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Haboob.



It's a massive wall of sand and wind. Lawrence of Arabia caliber shit.

That was up North, and it's not quite accurate.  A haboob is when the wind blows directly DOWN, throwing a gigantic pile of the planet and a whole bunch of Coyote shit about a mile straight up.  Then it, you know, comes down.

And when it runs into a rainstorm, as often happens, you get a mud storm.  Driving through them is fun; it's like trying to drive while a hundred people throw Taco Bell refried beans on your windshield every 3 seconds or so.

Down here, we just had sideways rain, and 310 lightning strikes in an hour.  Not quite a record.

I can't imagine why more people don't move there just for the atmospheric theatrics. I am glad you are safe and didn't get hit by lightening. Unless you wanted to, then I'm sorry you didn't.

I can't imagine why, when thinking about pounds of sanded coyote shit flinging itself at my windshield, my first thought was NOT "oh, I gotta go THERE."

The best part is that a haboob is not an instantaneous event.  It's more like someone aimed a sandblaster into a sandbox.  It lasts however long it lasts.

I think I was in one, once. Around 1994. It sucked, because we couldn't DRIVE.

Sure you can.  Only lesser wimps need to SEE to DRIVE.

In other news, I spent all day in the hospital with my father, who woke up this morning and then forgot how to read, write, speak, or see anything to his right.  By the time I got to his house, he had speech back, and didn't want to go to the hospital because he felt fine.

I pointed out that the part of him making the decision was the part that was in question, so he went.

By the time they'd CT'd him and were getting him ready for the MRI, he had regained all of his faculties, including his judgement (and was glad my mother and I made him go in). 

The good news is, this wasn't a stroke, it was something called a "TIA" which is sort of like a warning shot.  He'll be in the hospital at least one more day. 

Bullet dodged.

[Eater of Clowns]

Fuck, man, that's a scary one.

[Raz Tech]

Best wishes to you and yours.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Glad it was just a TIA and not a full blown stroke. Sorry it happened at all, Roger. Here's hoping for a quick recovery and no more of that!

[LMNO]

GAH! PEOPLE! PLEASE STOP ALMOST DYING!