As you can see, I stated in that that I wish you the best. Here is why:
In the other thread, you insisted on attacking the book I wrote, for no other reason than that you were mad at me. As we have dually discovered, anger makes people say and do shitty things. But I am not asking you for an apology. My art is not for everyone. Iím not the Great American Novelist, I made no attempt to be. What I did was an expression of my emotions at the time and it was a way out of a rough situation. That relationship is long over, the story is not, and Iím continuing it. You insist on psychoanalyzing me based on my prose, assuming that it was a way to self-aggrandize. Actually, writing that made me feel pretty shitty about myself and the whole situation I got myself into being a stupid hopeless romantic. It didnít just act as an outlet for my anger, but it also was a wake-up call.
Much like Iím sure the art installations youíve made for your exes did for you. I remember the skeleton for your ex-husband, and the pictures of you crying for Mr. Language, both of which I thought were awesome. No, really, Iím not saying that as a way to patch up, they were awesome. Why? Because you found a creative outlet for your anger and emotions, thatís why. Okay, I admit to laughing over the crying pictures, but I laughed because thatís what was triggered. I wasnít laughing at your pain, I know that pain. That same pain is what made me write the book, as stupid as my choices were to get there. I cried like that. Crying makes us look like idiots. It makes us look weak and unwilling. Hiding behind a piece of art makes us look productive. That is what being an artist is about. If it wasnít for our power to create, bad things can happen. Bad things like saying really terrible things to a person half a world away because Iím having a shitty night and he threw me off the deep end.
None of this matters, though, right? I said something unforgivable, and Iím not asking for that. I havenít forgiven several people in my life, mostly because they fucking deserve my cold shoulder and Iím not of the mind to forgive all. I am not some savior, Iím a raging bitch, and I reserve that right.
I wonít be posting on this board any longer. Thereís no reason. Itís distracting me from the goals I have in life, such as getting this masterís degree, and being a solid rock in my husbandís life while we deal with the curve balls the Navy is already throwing at us. I guess that means itís time for me to grow up. As far as Iím concerned, the Mods can delete my account as soon as I post this.
Good luck on getting your doctorate.