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Topics - Choppas an' Sluggas

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The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / NIGEL!
« on: December 04, 2015, 07:44:01 am »
Your avatar is amazing.  I love you.

If you are willing to grant me one, anyway. 

I am limited by finances alone, having gotten transportation marginally sorted out.


I've spent the last 6 hours playing this and I can't tear myself away.  Have yet to explore all the board, keep getting shot by assholes.

...and I would like to see evidence supporting or, preferrably, destroying this statement, so I can either know something new or shove it down the ignorant's throat.  Unfortunately, I don't know where to start searching, and I am wondering if perhaps I can get a link or name to start reading.

The expanded version of what the hell I'm talking about:

So there's this guy who's a friend of a friend of mine. He said that the economical situation in America is like a diamond; there's the 1% at the top, the very rich; there's the middle class, which comprises the most people; and then there's the poor, at the bottom, another 1%.  This guy is pretty okay, but every time I listen to him talk for an extended period of time he says something completely ignorant, but I don't have citations on me, so instead of correcting him with data all I can basically say is "Nuh uh!" and it aggravates me to be so ignorant myself. 

It's just a hope that someone can point me in the right direction and I'm not expecting anything, I'm just hopeless at researching is all.


You need to have an account, because I guess it has an MA rating, but my god.  It's still a masterpiece of what the hell, oh right a child wrote this.  AN ENORMOUSLY TALENTED CHILD.

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / P3nt
« on: June 12, 2013, 10:03:07 pm »
Your dog is adorably derpy in your avatar.

While I do not want a straight up recipe (since I'll be in a competition), I would like to ask if you have any tips for cooking goddamn amazing chili.  Do you have?

Also other people too, I don't mean to be dissing.

RPG Ghetto / Sooooo, L5R 4th ed...
« on: May 13, 2013, 08:36:44 pm »
Due to being dumb and making decisions without fully comprehending the results, and needing to make friends with the locals, I just took myself out of the celestial order and became an avatar of an earth jinn.  I have to find a magic school (emphasis on earth) now.

Any ideas? Does anyone have the Second City book?  I'd like to take a Burning Sands or Ivory Kingdoms type of deal, what with being Ivory myself now, but there isn't a copy in the game store.

RPG Ghetto / sooo, this isn't exactly RPG, it's a card game, but
« on: March 07, 2013, 09:57:40 am »
I'M DYING FOR A GAME OF L5R, but is 2am* and I can't go somewhere I'm likely to find one., so talkung about it seems like a good alternative. Anyway, i want to see if anyone else plays.Coyote, I know you mentioned you once played, but am not sure if you still do, or even want to discuss it.

Oh man, kotei is coming up soon, and Tucson has the first event of the season (we stole it out from under Phoenix. Take THAT,  you snobby bastards!) coupled with the newly released Torn Asunder set, which will be tourney legal if they aren't already, and 80 people expected to attend just for the card playing bit and not necessarily for the honor bit of the tourney, this is going to be a huge, awesome cl,usterfuck.  Oh, I am totally going to get into the honor side too. SO MUCH EXCITING, CAN'T EVEN STOP THINKING ABOUT IT.

Please excuse my enthusiasm, you who knew about it twenty years ago or so. I only discovered it last year, and I am getting pretty okay and wanna discuss things which may make me a better player. U

I want to go to the SoCal and Oklahoma events, too, because I want to hit that level of "weird fucker who obsesses over that game." Also, three kotei '13 prize packs, and a chance to play and meet new people. I doubt it'll happen, but I can always try in a few years when it isn't as much of a pipe dream.

I do not like the art in this set, save for a few of them (mostly the promos, the experienced versions of certain characters, and a handful of odds and ends. It looks like AEG just went to amateur hour at the local library, threw money at random fan art, and then slapped it onto the card.  I feel similarly about how the cards have made the environment. The cards are either STUPID REATARDED UNBLANCED GOOD for clans the forumites in winter court larping favored or ABSOLUTELY RUBBISH for clans and deck types that really needed some equalizer. Especially since their story is essentially saying okay that was a fun and engaging thing, now to set up the most shafted clan to gain a huge amount of equalization. Everyone ready for this? Yeah? Okay. BOOM shafted clan starts war with three enormous clans all at once, they'll probably not survive as a great clan after this, aaaand story gets canned midway through. Thanks a bunch, aeg. Totally love how you're going to kill my favorite deck because you wouldn't give them things they needed.  I hate you so much right now.

*It's actually 3 now. Stupid phone typing slowness.

Discordian Recipes / Flavor Mud, pork ribs + sauce, and onions.
« on: February 26, 2013, 10:08:09 am »
Flavor mud: a combination of numerous spices and herbs mixed with olive oil. Consistency achieved is too thick to be called "sauce," so instead is called "mud," since it looks and feels like a moderate clay:top soil ratio mud (except that it smells good and tastes awesome after being cooked).

Today's mud features the following:
Fines herbes
Ground coriander
sea salt
Safflower... stuff. It's red and kind of tubey.
smoked paprika
dried shallots
Ground yellow mustard
poultry seasoning
seasoned meat tenderizer
liquid smoke
Olive oil

Pork ribs, slightly suspect (do not recommend)

AWNJ JOOSS (no sugar added kind, such as odwalla or naked brands make)
Lemon curd
"Spicy" mango Thai dipping sauce

Sweet onions
More paprika, salt, poultry seasoning, olive oil

Oven temp 350F (18 centimeters for you Europe spags)

Put the ribs in a cake pan and coat both sides with flavor mud.

Slice onions, add spices, mix well with generous amount of olive oil, also in a cake pan.

Put everything in the oven until it's done and you feel confident you won't die from eating it. This may take a few hours, up to 3.5ish.

Don't worry if it looks burnt, it's supposed to look like that. Onions should be caramelized before they are removed.

After removing meat from oven, add half a cup of juice, two and a half tbsp lemon curd, a couple bottle shakes of worsterwhatever, and a cup of that fake and yellow Thai gunk together in a small saucepan. Heat on low, mixing well so the curd is all squished up.

Serves you, unless your meat is still definitely okay. Probably about six, in that case.

Discordian Recipes / Shit. Fuck! GAWDEMMIT!! pork chops and carrots.
« on: February 21, 2013, 06:52:15 am »
Pork chops, boneless and thinly sliced
Carrots (not the baby kind)
Ancho Chile powder
Lemon pepper
Ground mustard
Brown sugar
Orange juice
Liquid smoke
dried chopped onions
stick o' butter
stainless steel cookware and electric stove, none of which you've used before (important!)

First, start the carrots. Take a medium saucepan and melt the stick of butter in it on 7. 7 is a reasonable number for cold but- SHIT, IS BURNING! 5, 5, 5! Okay, is stop burning, but it's too hot still for it be by itself ahhhhhhh BROWN SUGAR AND HEAT 2. Okay. Not hot enough. Orange juice and back to 5. Cut up two or three carrots before the much begins bubbling too much and toss them in, peels and all. Cover.

Eye the small stainless steel pan with loathing. Know that it is going to be a pain to clean, especially if you can't manage to not burn the liquid. Season pork chops with the stuff, not using the brown sugar or orange juice yet. Throw it in the pan, season the other side, flip, remove from pan. Begin seasoning next chop FUCK pan is burning. Splash orange juice in, throw chop in. Begin the battle to not burn everything, alternating between juice, worsterwhatever and liquid smoke. Halfway there, things are looking good, major catastrophes avoided what the hell is that noise. Carrots are burning and what is that noise and WHY IS TGE BURNER TURNING HI RED WHEN IT'S STILL ON 5 HEAT GAWDEMMIT MY STOVE IS BROKEN. Turn burner off before it explodes or something and remove pot from heat. Deem carrots salvageable, despite burned sugar. Finish cooking chops. Regard horrible brown slop in pan, then pour it over the chops. Whatever.

Add snow and a terrible eagerness to please according to taste. Admit that it really didn't come out too bad. Feeds three people.

« on: February 08, 2013, 04:38:58 am »
Beginner mode:

Step one: make sure there is about $25 in your money thing.
Step two: go to the grocery store.
Step three: Go to the front where they have hot, precooked meats like fried or baked chicken. Grab one of them. If the biscuits are there, grab them, too. If they have a corn side dish, grab it too. If not, fuck that corn, you've got better things to do than wait around for it to decide the hot table appliance is good enough for its presence.
Step 4: Go to the fresh fruits area. Fuck, you are dying for some sugar (or not I guess, but why would you be doing this step then?). Strawberries sound... okay. You guess. Strawberry goop sounds tastier at the moment, though. Holy fuck, are those ripe blackberries next to the red sugar glop? SHIT YES. GRAB THAT PACKAGE RIGHT NAO.
Step 5: okay, hands are getting full now. You probably should have grabbed a cart or basket. Oh well, there's only whipped cream left. Make the harrowing trek to the frozen dessert aisle and grab a container of that awesome sticky white shit.

At home or wherever, divvy up the chicken, biscuits, and any sides you decided to get while standing slackjawed at the meat counter. Cut biscuit in half, apply 5-8 berries, spoon a pile of glop onto that, and top with whip cream. Stuff that shit in your face hole.

Probably enough for two people, or four depending.

« on: January 26, 2013, 07:06:05 am »
This Turkey I would like to eat before it goes bad, but eating the same thing every day until it's gone, well, I'm not so desperate that this sounds appealing. Can I ask you lovely wonderful people for any suggestions on what to do with leftovers so I can eat it without getting bored? Also it would be nice to have suggestions that are simple in the way of ingredients. As basic as you can think. Please! <3

I can't find the fucking quotes of the moment thread, so here's this:

Having an argument about schedule fubar with regards to it being ex's turn to take monkey for the holiday (I take him certain holidays on odd years, he does on evens.  He hasn't taken him a single holiday that he's supposed to this year so far).  Excuses, arguing, excuses, arguing and poking (I'm NOT sorry, because he shows no interest in taking a bigger role in monkey's life, and he ought to be ashamed), arguing and defensive, calling shenanigans, whining about how he doesn't get to go out, then this:

Me:  Go out on a weeknight.  Meet up with (GF) somewhere right after work and do something.  Stop taking your friends for granted and show a little appreciation and maybe they'll cut you a break occasionally and watch (his kids).
Stop whinging about how you can't do anything and Go Do Something.

Him: n't as I told u I save these text.

getting back in town so no drop him off on friday.  And as for friend and not apprectating them um how that got 4 u and roger and jen? Ya not well. 

Me:  I think you might be sending texts too quickly.  I didn't get a clear messageout of that except that you seem to be saying it isn't worth it to treat your friends with decency.

That's a fucked up thing to say, man.  It might be why you have no friends.

Him:  I don't give a shit about friend if they don't like honesty then they r not friendm so have a nice night and a good thanksgiving.

So I guess you were right, and him just being him IS a punishment.   :lulz:  I'm sorry I doubted you.

So, I realized a while ago - I don't really remember how long - that my life has been completely devoid of all meaning.  Even the monkey, who I love deeply (when I can feel things that have meaning) and genuinely feel pride in my duty towards, was the product of something completely meaningless.  I'm never going to tell him that, though.  He does have meaning, and his life will.  I'll make sure of it.

My duty as a parent, I realized last night, is to get him to adulthood safe and healthy - that's it.  But expanding "healthy" out to it's full equation means so many other things than physical well being - it means playtime, bedtime stories and music and kisses goodnight, teaching by example to be a decent human being, lessons about self-reliance and asking for help when you need it, socializing, the list is endless and goes on - that if I were explain it in just that first sentence, I wouldn't feel bad about myself and my role in being a parent.  It's my deal, not anyone else's. 

Fuck everyone and what they think about me.  I no longer have the time, patience, or luxury to keep these Negative Nancies around me, while I screw my head-brain up trying to achieve their approval while simultaneously trying to grasp the things I need to keep myself balanced and functioning.

That's what I'd like to say, but I think thinking like this and acting as such might stress the people I care about too much, because they care what people think about me.  Perhaps is best to not?  Perhaps.  I think so, maybe.


I existed (wouldn't call it living) for a solid twenty some odd years playing shit straight and safe and sane.  This led to an overabundance of having no fun whatsoever.  I've had it in the back of my mind for a year or two that life is short, shorter than most people think.  A lot of people realize this, yeah, that's cool, but it seems like they just get on about their days as if they were going to live another forty years, minimum.  They don't know how they're going to die, so they just sort of "Meh" at the world. 

Well, I'm not them.  I'm not anyone, except me.  I'm pretty sure I know that my life will probably end at my own hand, eventually.  Not soon, I think, not too terribly soon.  But I'll lose the fight someday, and it'll be game over, and what then?  What will I have done to excuse my life here?

The past couple of months have been tumultuous for me.  I'm somewhere different now, and I don't like it very much, but there's nothing I or anyone else can do about it.  Well, there is a thing I can do, and that thing is to make up for years lost being safe and sane and motherfucking boring as a piece of cowshit.  I'm ready for debauchery and obnoxiousness and laughing and grinning and baying at the moon, shrieking gaily and cawing and leaping and chasing and fighting and dancing and more laughing.  That will be the rest of my life, to the best of my ability to keep doing so.  I've been doing good at it so far, so that's a positive thing. 

This second, I feel like my brain is glazed over and has a frozen grin and grimace of cold hate and a scary leer all at the same time.  I didn't a few days ago, so I know it'll pass pretty soon, but it isn't a nice feeling.  I'm getting good at ignoring things about myself or things I feel that I don't like, so it's cool I guess.  It's just kind of unsettling to not be able to feel things, sort of.  Not deep things, anyway. 

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