"I need time off to go for an interview for a better job"
I would like to formally submit a request for a brief but justified absence this afternoon in order to pursue activities related my professional development.
"You are clearly incompetent yet earn 5 times what I do. I am considering having you beaten by goons"
If you review the attached presentation, you may find it in the best interest of our Department to invest in protective facegear for all management staff.
"You have no choice in this because of the realities of law and business you blithering simpleton"
We seek to assure you that events will transpire in strict alignment with all previously agreed-to conditions. If you would like to discuss the matter in greater detail, please consult our Defenestration Department on floor 16B.
"Pay me money or I will call the regulatory authority"
My conduct and communications on this matter are strictly bound both by the applicable legal framework and by the compensatory dedication which binds me to my position.
"I am not planning or doing anything suspicious"
I have taken no counter-cooperative action and seek only to bolster our common benefit in all circumstances.