Show Posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Messages - P3nT4gR4m

Pages: 1 2 3 [4] 5 6 7 ... 589
The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Spagbook
« on: December 25, 2014, 10:26:12 am »
You can't go wrong if you stick to the classics!

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Spagbook
« on: December 23, 2014, 09:59:47 pm »
 :eek: I was married to someone like that a couple of decades ago. Did it with her glutes, too. Playboy - toned and that - "please let me out" thing at the end :fap: :argh!: :fap:

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Spagbook
« on: December 23, 2014, 09:43:15 pm »
DT is Dynamic Tension. Makes me want to shake Charles Atlas by the ha...aaaaaaaand!

Basically, apply tension to the muscles all the time or more intensely, briefly in workout scenarios. It translates to the way you sit, the way you stand, the way you lift things (pretend they're heavy and flex accordingly) muscles should always be rippling. Move through the different groups. The tipping point comes when the body is trained like a dog, it expects it. Your muscles will crave input. Path of least resistance is to give in to the demands of the machine. Flex. Constantly.

Try sitting in a room that is a good bit too cold for comfort without developing hypothermia and start flexing everything, arms, shoulders, abs, pecs, lats, obliques, the works. This will heat you up enough to be comfortable but only if you're flexing a bit of you at all times. It's almost like a cheat but it does the job for me.

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Spagbook
« on: December 23, 2014, 04:37:46 pm »
Yeah, if the choice of lifestyle is sedentary, the body will accommodate. I get by with a kayak session once or twice a week that's pretty much on par with a hard gym workout. The kind where my legs are fkin jelly and I just want to lie down for a couple of days. Rest of the week I use DT, almost constantly which I think is a beneficial as fuck habit to develop, coupled with the fact I move about my environment with a very "parkour" approach. I like the way the vehicle feels, navigating space. And I tend to take staircases a flight at a time and vault barriers rather than walk along to the gap and shit like that.

My ape basically just conforms to the workload I put on it. Diet isn't really an issue, although I do fast a lot more than most people. I eat when I need it, which isn't the same as having three meals a day. Fuel intake is determined by activity level. If I'm putting a lot of load on it, I stuff more organic matter in the filler hole.

After a few years, some boys grow into men, some maggots.

All men aint created equal.

Some strong, some smart.

Some weak, some stupid.

Blame what you like.

It's a complicated causal mix but the outcome is the same.

All men aint created equal.

Some men lead, some men follow.

Some men shit and some men swallow.

Some men live and others rot.

One man falls cos one man shot.

The solution to the inferior man is academic.

Since it needed to be applied back at the start.

When he was just a boy.

Maybe he can change, maybe he can turn it around.

Til then, what?

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Spagbook
« on: December 23, 2014, 05:47:57 am »
Tough call on the lean v's chebs issue. Kelly Brook or Alana Blanchard? Anything mine looks like is a side effect of what I use it for, not the primary consideration. Not that looking okay with the shirt off isn't nice and all but even if it happened to make me look horrible, I'd be doing what I do.

Live the life you wanna live and quit looking in the mirror so much, right?

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Spagbook
« on: December 22, 2014, 07:47:12 pm »
Gee shucks! :lol: Guy in our canoe club, must be pushing 70. Still rocking the washboard. Reckon I can keep it going til maybe around there, unless I get diseased or crippled or shit. Meanwhile the top bit is getting older and gnarlier ever time I see the fucking thing looking back at me through shiny glass. Truth be told it's the face I always wanted. Being pretty never sat right with me. A demonic snarl was much more important. I have a very metal sense of aesthetic :lulz:

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Spagbook
« on: December 22, 2014, 06:45:18 pm »
Abs still (almost) standing up to christmas fat and booze invasion. Feeling a bit drunk, a bit stoned and a bit camwhoreish. Merry x-mas guys and girls!

Techmology and Scientism / Re: Attn: LMNO
« on: December 19, 2014, 06:40:37 pm »
That's fine if you have a completely normal brain  :argh!:

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: LMNO
« on: December 19, 2014, 06:39:12 pm »
Wait - isn't it spelled "Coral"? :?

That's a fake meme, damnit! It's a cheap imported rip-off meme. Probably made in a sweatshop by pre schoolers for a meth. You should be ashamed of yourself  :argh!:

Techmology and Scientism / Attn: LMNO
« on: December 19, 2014, 06:24:27 pm »
HAH! Now j00r mysterious quantum powers are only twice as complicated as shit I can wrap my head around. One more discovery like this and the secrets of the quantums are mine. Mwuhahaha!  :evil:

Bring and Brag / Re: As of tonight...
« on: December 14, 2014, 11:13:11 am »
This sequence is about five minutes long, at quarter framerate slowmo which means it amounts to, all in, what was only about seventy five seconds of my life. I want to tell you about that seventy five seconds. It was a minute and fifteen where everything I am as a kayaker, everything I know about doing it, my physical condition, my timing, the whole kit and caboodle was called into play.

I get to test this amphibious machine that I've spent all this time building. Part man part rotomoulded plastic and carbon fibre, and I get to put it all up against mother ocean whom, it would seem, is none too happy with me this fine Sunday. She's had me swimming once by now and upside down so many time I've lost count. Three to four feet was advertised. I've bitten it on a few pushing eight by now and there's monsters about. Seen them bearing their teeth way out back. Ten footers easy. And meat in them.

I was back in the soup, chatting to a guy who turned out to be from my home town of Falkirk. He was paddling a surf slipper and finding it hard going. I was glad I'd brought the longboat. He told me he wished he'd brought his. By this time both of us had tried to punch out only to be beaten back by long, five and seven wave sets, getting a hold of you and back flipping or broaching you back to the beach.

Suddenly I saw a gap open up. Game time! I went for it. Never even said goodbye to the slipper pilot. No time. Just dig down, punch over the debris of a tail ender and leg it. Straight out. Heart pumping, blood singing, the roar of the break everywhere, deafening yet strangely tranquil white noise. I love it. It's the nearest thing I have to a theme tune.

Clear the spray. Funny little peaker ahead. He's got a bit of bite in the middle but I'd clear him no probs, even he wasn't running out right, toward me, which he was. His big brother, tho, he's got a couple of feet of shorebreak attitude. Even rears up when I get close and bares his teeth, all attitude. Yeah, right. Four foot high in his socks. These little bastards can mess you up if they get you side on and take you for a long bongo but I'm coming straight in like a motherfucken exocet.

I smash a hole in his lip like a cage fighter going to town on a primary school kid. Grab some air and then drop into a sneaky little aftershock, bit of grunt required to keep the pace on, cos I've seen the next one by now. Lip curled in a snarl off to the right, looks like it's still running out this way but I don't want to chance it. YOMP!!!

Sure enough it ran out and left an easy wave but that was just the warmup event. Every set that comes in, comes in with a pattern of waves. They'll push a couple of warmup waves your way then an odd number (I've read it's always odd. Dunno if it's true but I've never noticed an even set before) of main set waves. This chap in front of me? Nope, he's just the last of the welcome party, twice the wave his little brothers and sisters were before but still just an adolescent in the grand scheme of things. YOMP HARDER!!!

As I clear the lip I catch sight of his mammy and she's got mean and muscle and attitude all in spades. She means me harm. CHARGE!!! Twenty feet away and she starts snarling at me, her face pristine, flawless, majestic. Like a cliff face, made of water. It's going to be close. If that pocket of energy, when it comes burning along the wave, like an incendiary fuse. If I'm not clear when that reaches me then BOOM!

I'm momentarily aware that I'm paddling vertically, punching the lip just as it dumps and dropping my bow six or seven feet onto the back face. It's one of those - Dukes of Hazzard - "Yeeeha" moments. Grabbing air. I whoop, as I'm digging in deep and fighting to regain forward momentum. Her sister is bearing down on me. Mean seems to run in the family. One does not simply stop for a breather in the impact zone. KEEP YOMPING!!!

PLF? : Check
JIT LIP? : Check
AIR? : Check
Breather? ... Negative... MONSTER!!!

Looks like daddy is here. Daddy is big and menacing but, compared to Uncle Trevor, charging in behind him, he's a pussycat. Trevor is badass. Just got out of jail, doing a stretch for GBH and looking to upgrade that to murder and if I stay where I am he's going to pummel the fuck out of me a rearrange my skeleton into a whole bunch of quickfire poses that resemble modern art. ATTACK TREVOR!!!

Pause the clip at 04:19. I'm paddling uphill. The big bulge I'm on is a shockwave, going back up the face, from the impact on the seabed a good ten feet or so below me. It's headed up toward that lip, rising up five or six feet above me. It's going to make it bigger. Hang on in there. Dig deep. PADDLE!!!

I was pretty safe by the time I crossed the top. I had a good second or two in the bag but if I'd got snagged by one of the waves before, even just a little bit. If I'd lost just that little bit of speed, if I'd met him half a dozen paddle strokes ago, he'd have beaten me senseless. I'd have been back on the beach having a deja-vu conversation with the guy from Falkirk again.

Relax. One more wave. Aftershock from the monster. Lot of meat on her bones. Packing a punch. Going to do some damage when she gets in shore a bit but I'm clear. Take a breather. Get ready to chase one of these bad boys back in so I can do it all again. Had some good runs on Sunday but this is the seventy five seconds, stretched to five minutes that stuck in my head. I love my gopro when I get clips like this. When I watch it on the bigscreen, it feels like I'm back there. That seventy five seconds of my life. That'll last me hours, days, maybe even weeks.

Is mp4 (video file) not gif

Relax, Roger. Statistically speaking they just need to do the experiment enough times  :lulz:

Aneristic Illusions / Re: Random News Stories
« on: December 12, 2014, 09:32:48 pm »
Troof. Now, a decade and change later, it seems kinda like the outrage is - after the horse has bolted. Coupled with the fact that a significant number aren't outraged. They're justifying it. Humanity is sick. We have social cancer. I knew this but was happily ignoring the fact. Hiding it behind a vague hatred of our species. I'm pissed as a motherfucker that this latest in a long line of atrocity is kinda ramming the point home. Fuck this report!  :argh!:

Pages: 1 2 3 [4] 5 6 7 ... 589