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Messages - Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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I don't know. I think a large part of the reason to keep re-evaluating is because the people and environments around us change, and sometimes things that worked well for us once stop working so well, but we may be oblivious to that if we aren't up for a little periodic re-evaluation.

Have you ever known an older person who was so set on ways of interacting with the world that worked perfectly for them 20 years ago, but just seem hopelessly rigid and blindly hierarchical and authoritarian now? Contrast that with the older people who seem to adapt quickly, and have an endless curiosity for new information and different perspectives. One is a dinosaur. The other is wise.

I walk about 4-5 miles daily when I'm attending classes, because the campus is ridiculously huge. One of the science buildings is over a mile away from the other two. And of course, I have to get there to begin with.

But I'm also fighting that uphill battle of  "Oh, you're over 40? TIME FOR THE OL METABOLISM TO SLOW DOWN SOME MORE". Which is fine, really, but it also means that dropping a few pounds isn't the cakewalk it was after having my kids.

Yeah, I hear that. Twenty years ago, the kind of workout I get on a daily basis would have had me looking like a bodybuilder. Now, itll plateau soon and Ill get stronger and tougher, but still be 15-20 lbs overweight.

When I lose enough that it doesn't kill my knees, I'll start running again, which should help with the last ten pounds.

First fat bastard thread is stickied in Discordian Recipes.

Oh well.

Just in case you were looking for it. 😉

I was, earlier today, but it didn't pop up in a search and then I gave up.

The article is literally unreadable.

First fat bastard thread is stickied in Discordian Recipes.

Oh well.

I walk about 4-5 miles daily when I'm attending classes, because the campus is ridiculously huge. One of the science buildings is over a mile away from the other two. And of course, I have to get there to begin with.

But I'm also fighting that uphill battle of "Oh, you're over 40? TIME FOR THE OL METABOLISM TO SLOW DOWN SOME MORE". Which is fine, really, but it also means that dropping a few pounds isn't the cakewalk it was after having my kids.

While I've been unemployed, I've been trying to get into better shape. Job ended about 5 months ago in late December. I started out lifting weights and eating normally, except for eating more protein. I put on 5 more pounds between January, and the middle of March when I switched to walking and eating 1200-1500 calories a day. I was losing about 2 pounds a week for a while, but then the weather started getting kind of warm, so I broke out the exercise bike, and was doing 1-1.5 hours a day on that, trying to maintain about a 130 BPM heart rate.  I thought that would be as good as walking, but I've only been losing about a pound a week on the bike.

Altogether, I gained 5 pounds of, hopefully, mostly muscle, and then lost 15 pounds of, hopefully, mostly fat.

Riding the bike mostly just works the quads, so I'm picking up the weights again in addition to riding the bike. Hopefully, that will get me back on track. I've got another 50 pounds that I need to get rid of. If I can maintain 2 pounds a week, I should be down to a reasonable weight by Christmas.

Thing is, at 1200 calories a day, I should be losing 2 pounds a week just from the dieting alone. The exercise should be good for another pound or two, based on some internet calorie calculator I found.

Apparently, fat is bad at math.

The body is a complicated device. When you start building muscle at the same time as going to a very calorie-restricted diet, you have a couple of competing processes going on: one, your need to convert aminos to protein, and two, your need to convert fat to energy. What's probably happening is that you are converting a lot of your food to muscle while simultaneously burning off fat. Once your muscle development plateaus, your overall weight should plummet.

That sounds like an excellent plan!

What is the elevation going to be like in Peru? Colombia's thin air was a real challenge for me, making moderate activity much more difficult.

Huaraz is over 10,000 feet, which means I am guaranteed a few days of elevation sickness. I was born and raised 300 feet above sea level, so unfortunately elevations over about 8000 feet can be brutal on me, although my past experiences in Colorado and mountain camping indicates that I should adapt relatively quickly, perhaps in part due to my Chiricahua and White Mountain ancestry. Part of my summer hiking plan involves high-elevation camping, since we do have all these convenient volcanoes around here.

I have no idea where the original "How not to be a fat bastard" thread went, so I decided to start up another.

Previously, I was about 15 pounds overweight, and I'd been trying to lose it for fucking ever. Then I had surgery to remove a malfunctioning and tumor-filled organ, after which I weighed ten pounds less (yay!) but had complications (boo!) that restricted my exercise and general well-being for something ridiculous like six months. THEN, after that shit resolved, my internals took over a year to get back to something approximating 100%. In the meantime, I slowly packed on about 30 pounds.


So, one of the things that nobody mentioned about about major abdominal surgery: not only do you have downtime from healing, and not only does it take a ridiculously long time for internal healing of severed musculature, but also, by the time you've healed you are so out of shape that flights of stairs you used to run up without noticing will make you feel like you're dying. Everything will be horribly out of shape, including your heart and lungs. That "kinda challenging" hike over the Waterline Trail to Skyline Tavern? Don't even think about it. So, after the actual healing part, it can take several months to a year to get your general fitness level back. AND THEN you can start losing all the postsurgery weight you've slowly gained.

With the help of an epic 180-step staircase in the hills south of the university, I lost five pounds before my trip to Borneo, and between Borneo and today, I'm down another five. So far so good, that leaves me with 20 to go. My current goal is five a month, and to that purpose I am walking four to five miles a day, and have cut alcohol out almost entirely (difficult, given that my son makes really excellent beer!) as well as carefully monitoring everything I eat. My school routine is easier than my home routine: a light breakfast, a small container of unsweetened full-fat yogurt with wheat berries, chopped nuts, and fruits, a hefty salad for dinner, and a snack of fruits and vegetables in the evening. Home is trickier because I'm here all day, usually in front of the computer. Boring! Boredom eating is tempting, and often almost autopilot.

Still, if I can lose five pounds in June, and five pounds in July, then in August I go to Peru, which will involve a lot of hiking and physical labor. Pretty much a guarantee that I will lose five pounds there. That puts me within a stone's throw of my goal by September, at which point I'll be back at school pretty much every day, making it easy as long as I maintain my relationship with the Cardinell stairs and stay far away from the taco cart.

Goddamn those are some delicious tacos.

It's called

I'm gonna be honest, it probably pays better than neuroscience.

Literate Chaotic / Re: To slay a jabberwocky
« on: Yesterday at 03:36:07 pm »
Love this poem. I definitely think it lends itself well to spoken form.

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Swingers
« on: Yesterday at 03:32:26 pm »
I guess you never stop working on shit, really. People who do get smug and insufferable because they're unable to view their own bullshit.

The Richard Nixon school of ballet and the arts / Re: Swingers
« on: Yesterday at 03:28:44 pm »
Is LuciferX a non-native English speaker? Because I don't want to shit on somebody for having a poor grasp of a second or third language, I just really really cannot understand what the fuck he's on about.

No, he just takes statements he can't understand as insults, or denigration, because he has ego issues. He also neglects to state his personal views and opinions as views or opinions, and instead, states them as universal facts. This is also because of ego issues.

After everyone takes the opposing side, he remembers to throw in the fact that his statements were, in-fact, views and opinions. He does this, without realizing it, because of the ego issues. You can't have an incorrect opinion or view, so his ego re-writes his paragraphs for him in E-Prime and with extra (Yet, twisted) pedantry.

How do I know this? Because I used to do the same shit. Maybe I still do the same shit. But admitting that you do it and seeing it in yourself and others is the first step to solving the problem. Believe it or not (This is at LuciferX) you don't need other people to help you with that problem, because I know you probably wouldn't let anyone try to fix that problem because you're so hateful towards the idea of someone who isn't you (Because everyone is lesser than you, right?) fixing you.

EDIT: Basically, this makes it seem as though Lucifer is disagreeing one moment, and switching directions the next. And when you're under attack when you have ego issues, you tend to kick your pedantry machine too hard, causing it to spit out the sludge you read by LuciferX half of the time. You start re-reading pieces of what you write, as you write it, and you throw different ideas into it in every cycle, causing loops of concept shittery. It's just what happens when your ego is desperate and you have a decent intelligence. Yeah, I said it, I have no doubt that he's intelligent. He just has some issues he needs to deal with before he'll start making sense.

Whoa, that was pretty incisive.

Thanks for the insight.

Thanks. When you spend years breaking your own tendencies down into a science, you start to recognize the patterns in others as well.

When you have the background that I do, and the years of experience in putting others down (As a small child, until about the age of 14, I was an awful bully.), it gets hard to look at yourself on any realistic level without feeling terrible. I have no doubt that he was also bullied and became a bully out of spite. But, the moment you realize your shit stinks just like everyone else's, and you're not actually enlightened beyond any of these "mere mortals," life gets sooooo much easier. And people get so much easier to deal with.

Another thing I realized eventually:

You gotta love the shithead that you actually are, not the one you imagine yourself to be. You got some baggage? You got some dirt? Oh well. No one is perfect. Forgive yourself, and move on. Nothing is irredeemable. I watched my mom tell my child molesting grandfather, that she forgives him for everything he did to her, just before he died. Ignoring your flaws is not a valid method of redemption.

TLDR: If you were ever interested in the process by which a Pathological Narcissist fixes itself, read above.

I think that element of introspection is really important. Not just "finding yourself" bullshit, which often takes the form of running away from who you are in pursuit of who you wish you were, but actually looking at yourself and going, OK this is what I'm working with. The real me is messy, flawed, and vulnerable. But still, it's who I am, it's what I've got. Are there things I would like to change about myself? OK that takes work, and can only be done incrementally, and it takes a long time, and I'll fuck it up, so I'd better be forgiving of myself.

I think that loving one's self, flaws and all, is really hard and really important. I didn't like myself as a child, and I had a hard time forgiving my mistakes. This really limited my ability to protect my own boundaries or to be compassionate of others, which is something that I still work on. But I couldn't even start until I developed compassion for my own fucked-up past self.

I am feeling less overwhelmed today. It helped that I got really positive feedback on my last presentation, and I got a B on my Cell midterm (more than half the class got a C or below... the second Cell midterm is brutal, all new info we've never seen before and a lot of it... it's typically the lowest score of the term so I am COMPLETELY happy with a B) and Dr. R, on whom I have a hopeless crush, hailed me by name and made chit-chat with me later in the afternoon.

Now I just need to get a solid night's sleep and write a paper, 2 research summaries, and start a case study tomorrow, before diving into a weekend of studying my ass off.

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