Topics

46

Apple Zone / Answering math problems in short-story form

« on: December 05, 2012, 03:29:26 am »

3. In the following situations, give a practical interpretation in words of the function described.

a. f(h(t)), where A = f(r) is the area of a circle of radius r and r = h(t) is the radius of the circle at time t .

I am walking along minding my own business, when suddenly, strange beings appear from nowhere. “We’re from Cerberus,” they say, “And we need to store this transdimensional portal here for a while. Bye!” and then they shout something nonsensical and disappear. But they’ve left behind a medium-sized glowing circle on the ground. It’s pretty much the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen in my life, and even as the hair rises on the back of my neck, I can’t take my eyes off it. I don’t know how long I stared at it before I notice that it’s growing. Apparently the radius of the circle increases as a function of the passage of time. Suddenly I remember what they’d shouted… “f(h(t)), where A = f(r) is the area of a circle of radius r and r = h(t) is the radius of the circle at time t”, and I realized what it meant… the open circular area of the portal is a function of the radius which is a function of the passage of time… and I knew that unless those guys came back real soon, the Earth was doomed.

47

Apple Zone / WHAT KIND OF MONSTERS

« on: December 04, 2012, 11:55:35 pm »

COME UP WITH THIS SHIT?

http://nsfwcorp.com/dispatch/loose-lips-buy-yachts

I don't mean the post. I mean what the post is about.

CLITORAL REDUCTION???? 

48

Apple Zone / HAVE YOU HEARD THE GOOD NEWS???

« on: December 04, 2012, 06:00:54 am »

Ever wondered why it is that sometimes something shitty happens to you, but you still maintain a positive attitude afterwards?

Ever wondered why sick people, crippled people, and even people of color can find a will to live and joy in their hearts?

Well, I'll tell you why... it's because of The Good Reverend Roger! You see, TGRR has taken the hate that ordinary people like you and I have deep, deep in our hearts, and he has taken that burden into his own heart so that we can be free! Isn't that wonderful?

Yes, TGRR has taken the hate of the world upon his shoulders... big, strong, hairy shoulders as shaggy and russet as Scottish cattle... in order to give us, his distant primate relatives, the freedom to function normally in our daily business without seizures, keening, foaming, incoherent ranting, or throwing heavy objects at our coworker's heads. He does all that for us! Isn't that wonderful?

If this news of all that TGRR has done for us has touched your heart in any way, please join hands with me as we bow our heads and, together, give thanks for his great gift to us.

49

Apple Zone / Captain Spanky's Spanking Sex Dungeon and Sex

« on: December 02, 2012, 04:09:33 am »

So, I was inspired earlier tonight by another member's post in the International Juggalo Erotic Fiction Writer's Association. I was inspired to follow in his footsteps and search "clown sex" on Amazon.

Result #3 was the Accoutrements Yodeling Pickle http://www.amazon.com/Accoutrements-11761-Yodelling-Pickle/dp/B0010VS078

Result #7 was Big Beautiful Woman Impregnated By A Killer Paranormal Clown: Impregnating Virgin Curves http://www.amazon.com/Beautiful-Impregnated-Killer-Paranormal-ebook/dp/B009FO3O9G

Result #41 was pure paydirt. Written by one Tits McGee, the title is Captain Spanky's Spanking a Sexy Police Lady http://www.amazon.com/Captain-Spankys-Spanking-Police-ebook/dp/B0081V77A6/ref=sr_1_41?ie=UTF8&qid=1354420983&sr=8-41&keywords=clown+sex

Intrigued by the compelling synopsis (excerpt: This is a sexy story full of detailed lovemaking, including sex in the ear!) I was driven to explore Tit's McGee's other titles. Some might argue that Captain Spanky's Spanking at the Republican National Convention is the best of the bunch, but I was instantly drawn toward the mysterious intrigue of Captain Spanky's Spanking Sex Dungeon and Sex. My fantastic good taste paid off, because not only is the tantalizing opening excerpt a jewel of erotic titillation, but this masterwork also has scintillating reviews. http://www.amazon.com/Captain-Spankys-Spanking-Dungeon-ebook/product-reviews/B007YUXPF6/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

I am downloading it to my Kindle for free RIGHT NOW.

50

Apple Zone / ON ISMISMISM

« on: November 29, 2012, 03:22:16 am »

IT IS SAID THAT AN ISM IS JUST A UNIFORM BUT I WOULD ARGUE THAT ISMISM IS ALSO A UNIFORM, A QUICK FIX, A PIGEONHOLE, A BOX, A WAY TO AVOID THINKING BY PUTTING EVERYTHING IN A CERTAIN CATEGORY LABELED "I AM BETTER THAN THAT". IT IS LAZY AND STUPID.

THAT IS ALL.

51

Apple Zone / Judge orders Big Tobacco to publicly admit lying

« on: November 28, 2012, 03:40:44 am »

This is fucking amazing: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/27/tobacco-deception-judge-ruling_n_2199973.html

A federal judge on Tuesday ordered tobacco companies to publish corrective statements that say they lied about the dangers of smoking and that disclose smoking's health effects, including the death on average of 1,200 people a day.

U.S. District Judge Gladys Kessler previously had said she wanted the industry to pay for corrective statements in various types of advertisements. But Tuesday's ruling is the first time she's laid out what the statements will say.

Each corrective ad is to be prefaced by a statement that a federal court has concluded that the defendant tobacco companies "deliberately deceived the American public about the health effects of smoking." Among the required statements are that smoking kills more people than murder, AIDS, suicide, drugs, car crashes and alcohol combined, and that "secondhand smoke kills over 3,000 Americans a year."

This actually gives me hope.

52

Apple Zone / So What's A White Boy To Do?

« on: November 27, 2012, 06:19:13 pm »

Today's conversation in Open Bar contained a passing comment that spurred this thought:

If your own culture is so full of bad signal that you don't actually WANT it, what do you do next? What if that's the motivation behind a lot of modern-day cultural appropriation... not "oh look, that's neat!" but "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!"?

What the hell do you do if you find your culture of origin so repugnant that you want nothing more than to repudiate it and walk away?

53

Aneristic Illusions / CAIN

« on: November 25, 2012, 05:58:28 pm »

Who coined the term "teahadi"? It's brilliant! The oldest reference I could find is this: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=102&topic_id=4798474&mesg_id=4798488

54

Aneristic Illusions / A weird, creepy article with an agenda

« on: November 25, 2012, 06:22:37 am »

Discuss: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/11/24/war-on-men/

Women aren’t women anymore.

To say gender relations have changed dramatically is an understatement. Ever since the sexual revolution, there has been a profound overhaul in the way men and women interact. Men haven’t changed much – they had no revolution that demanded it – but women have changed dramatically.

In a nutshell, women are angry. They’re also defensive, though often unknowingly. That’s because they’ve been raised to think of men as the enemy. Armed with this new attitude, women pushed men off their pedestal (women had their own pedestal, but feminists convinced them otherwise) and climbed up to take what they were taught to believe was rightfully theirs.

Now the men have nowhere to go.

It is precisely this dynamic – women good/men bad – that has destroyed the relationship between the sexes. Yet somehow, men are still to blame when love goes awry. Heck, men have been to blame since feminists first took to the streets in the 1970s.

But what if the dearth of good men, and ongoing battle of the sexes, is – hold on to your seats – women’s fault?


Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/11/24/war-on-men/#ixzz2DDFwyJ7W

55

Apple Zone / Sexual arousal after pooping

« on: November 21, 2012, 03:43:02 am »

...what is up with that?

56

Apple Zone / ATTN: ADMINS

« on: November 15, 2012, 06:00:21 pm »

With all the stalking that many of our members, including myself, seem to be on the receiving end of much of the time, it seems unnecessary and perhaps unwise to allow users who are not logged in to view people's profiles and search their post history. Few forums I am aware of have that feature turned on, for reasons that seem obvious; why would a non-member want to look at members' profiles and post history?

What do you say?

57

Aneristic Illusions / So my son started a petition

« on: November 15, 2012, 01:44:32 am »

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/legalize-mariuana-recreational-use-oregon/ngFhFRK9

How fucking cute is that?

Also, this is the email he sent accompanying the link:

So, I don't know if this awkward, but I just feel incredibly strongly of this subject. So, as weird as this sounds, I created a submission on "We The People" to legalize for recreational use in Oregon. If you could sign that would be pretty great and I would appreciate it quite a bit. And if it's not too much to ask, could you maybe also try and spread it around from your friends? Thank you for doing however much you can.
http://wh.gov/XcAR

I am so proud of my little guy!

58

Apple Zone / If anyone is interested in what I'm doing

« on: November 14, 2012, 03:53:48 am »

This podcast explains a lot of the theory behind what I'm doing in the study I'm working for, and if I'm not mistaken, directly mentions one of our sister studies in the same department. It's also just really interesting in terms of both cognitive and non-cognitive intelligence.

http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/474/back-to-school

59

Apple Zone / This website

« on: November 14, 2012, 03:08:21 am »

is a million hours of fun.

http://www.theuselessweb.com/

60

Apple Zone / SOCIOLOLGICAL EXPERIMENT

« on: November 12, 2012, 11:51:33 pm »

Dear PD,

I need your help with a class project. Don't worry, I'm not going to experiment on you! But if you would kindly take a moment to answer the following questions, I'd be much obliged.

What are some words you would use to describe teenagers?

How do you feel the media portrays teenagers?

Do you think it is an accurate or an inaccurate representation?

What are your impressions of teenagers?

Do you feel like your impressions of teenagers in general are accurate for teenagers you know personally, or yourself if you are a teenager?

Do you think that media representation of teenagers influences your expectations and treatment of teenagers, or other people's expectations and treatment of you if you are a teenager?

Thank you very much for your answers!