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Messages - Eater of Clowns

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We have a vacancy.

Sometime around the dissolution of his third marriage, one of my coworkers who'd so long teetered on the edge of keeping it together leaned a little too far in the wrong direction. He went on vacation in August and he never really came back. Five weeks of vacation, three weeks of floating holidays, a week of personal days, 17 years of accumulated sick time, the Family Medical Leave Act, and some doctor's notes that I can only assume were written by the Surgeon General got him a total of two and a half hours worth of work between August and April. To be clear, I have no doubt he was in a truly bad way during this time, but that is separate from the fact that he's a self serving, manipulative wretch who is the clearest candidate for Narcissistic Personality Disorder that I have ever met.

He came back in April and seemed back to normal. He was funny as usual, when not being a generally repugnant bigot, and was able to do the work as always. Right before his leave he started getting big into ham radio, obsessed by it really. He studied like mad for his certification and he collected every little thing he could from flea markets and online bid sites. During his meltdown, which none of us realized was still ongoing, that community may well have been his only social outlet besides his mother and his cat.

A few months back local agencies, ourselves included, were getting hoax active shooter calls. When our department talked about our response to these hoaxes, he brought up hoax mayday calls being sent over his radio bands. He said what a waste of resources they were, for the coast guard to respond, and how the transmissions can be triangulated within a few yards of their point of origin. He would say how awful he found the perpetrator. Thing is, he brought those mayday calls up a few more times outside of this context.

He got pulled into the director's office last week, was in there for less than a minute, and left without a word after. He didn't log out or take his lunchbox, he just took off in his car. I got pulled into the office. I was told if he attempted entry to my office not to let him in and to direct him to investigations, where his property was awaiting him. Along with a notice of termination and a no trespass order.

Right now the story appears to be that he got involved with a ham radio gang. Yes, a goddamn ham radio gang. And whether as part of his initiation or as a vendetta, he used our background access to research some rivals and broadcast their personal information over the air. Oh, and on some nights he got bombed and called in hoax maydays from home.

That makes I think about six coworkers that have turned over since I've started, fully half of which have gone under circumstances inglorious or outright insane. And I look around the room and I wonder who is next.

Awesome, Roger!

Yeah, I suddenly feel better.  Less trapped.

1 good offer on the table, and apparently a better one on the way.

Excellent work that lizard.

 :lulz: :argh!:

"Mace?  Fuck mace.  That was real, live bear spray."

"ON HIS BURN?"  I busted up laughing.

There's a MRA forum somewhere that has this tale from this guy's perspective and it must be fucking hilarious.

"...And then they followed me and sprayed me with fucking bear spray or some shit! What the fuck? I paid $5000 for this course!"


That sounds like an excellent plan!

What is the elevation going to be like in Peru? Colombia's thin air was a real challenge for me, making moderate activity much more difficult.

I got Tom Arnold.

The curse is just waiting, throwing warning shots at you all until then.

In a century the foodbabe will be smiling down from statues and they will cleanse themselves beneath her and then comes the curse's time.

Literate Chaotic / Re: Five word horror
« on: May 24, 2015, 03:00:43 pm »

...after reading one too many shaming threads in a group of otherwise intelligent people.

Let's just face a few facts here. If you have kids, you are a breeder who is overpopulating the planet. If you don't have kids, you are selfish and you'll regret it when it's too late, and you'll start popping out damaged kids like Sarah Palin does.

If you like to have sex, you're a slut, and if you don't like to have sex you're a prude. If you're a woman, you're either a slut or you're a ball-buster who is out to oppress men. If you're a guy, you're either a rapist or a beta.

If you like to drink, you're a lush, and if you don't, you're a square and probably a crypto-theist. If you smoke pot you're a useless lop of shit, and if you don't, you've betrayed the cause and are no longer cool.

If you are fat, you're what's wrong with America. If you're skinny, you must be anorexic. If you're in between, don't worry, the skinny people will call you fat and the fat people will call you bulimic.

If you're poor, it's because you choose to live that way. If you're rich, you're a monster. If you're middle class, you don't exist at all.

If you're THIS, you reek of privilege, and if you're THAT you're a slactivist, and if you're DEAD, it's because you wore a hoodie and couldn't obey the police.

You can't win. You can't break even. You can't even quit the game.

 You should be ashamed of yourself, you awful person.


I wonder if he realizes, at this point, that things are going to go poorly.   :lulz:

My uncle passed away Wednesday night.

Nothing much to say, really, but I figured I ought to follow up after dropping my problems in Open Bar a few days ago.

Sorry, man.  :sad:

Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

If you burn the place down you'll be doing the world a favor.

Is there truly any better omen for Tucson than a shit comet?

I've been tweeting as Enrico a lot the last few days, when I should be writing. It's oddly satisfying, but I'm looking for more horrible people to troll on there. It can't be all Donald a Trump and Gavin McInnes all the time...

I've been loving the shit out of it.  :lulz:

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