Random News Stories

[The Good Reverend Roger]

While I do note the above suspicious things, I'm going to ascribe a higher probability to an accidental than intentional crash.  Call it a gut feeling.

I'm gonna go with this for the moment.  Plane crashes are rare, but it only takes poor maintenance, bad weather, or just a stupid mistake.

[LMNO]

Looks like the new story is the stolen passports were from Iranians trying to migrate to Germany.


Probability of a cover story, or truth? 

[Junkenstein]

While I do note the above suspicious things, I'm going to ascribe a higher probability to an accidental than intentional crash.  Call it a gut feeling.

I'm gonna go with this for the moment.  Plane crashes are rare, but it only takes poor maintenance, bad weather, or just a stupid mistake.

I'm currently leaning in this direction too. Plane crashes are relatively rare and crashes due to terrorism rarer still despite some very public examples. It's a good one for the media because you have the shock of X hundred dead in one go which always sells copy. The fact that no-one seems to have claimed responsibility would suggest to me that it's a dull but fatal fuckup.

And Iranian migrating to Germany? They seemed to have been taking the long route.

[Reginald Ret]

While I do note the above suspicious things, I'm going to ascribe a higher probability to an accidental than intentional crash.  Call it a gut feeling.

I'm gonna go with this for the moment.  Plane crashes are rare, but it only takes poor maintenance, bad weather, or just a stupid mistake.

I'm currently leaning in this direction too. Plane crashes are relatively rare and crashes due to terrorism rarer still despite some very public examples. It's a good one for the media because you have the shock of X hundred dead in one go which always sells copy. The fact that no-one seems to have claimed responsibility would suggest to me that it's a dull but fatal fuckup.

And Iranian migrating to Germany? They seemed to have been taking the long route.

I've heard that all the phones still work on that plane but nobody is picking up.
Indirect travel sounds smart when you are emigrating without permission and plan to apply for asylum.

[Cain]

Lots of Iranians do want to work in Germany, it's true.

However, the Germans tend to like people who have useful skills (or lots of money), can speak German and no criminal record.  I mean, one of them was 18, so youthful idiocy can never be entirely ruled out, but the other one was 29 and definitely should've known better.  They managed to get to Doha and then Kuala Lumpur with Iranian passports just fine.....

[The Good Reverend Roger]

While I do note the above suspicious things, I'm going to ascribe a higher probability to an accidental than intentional crash.  Call it a gut feeling.

I'm gonna go with this for the moment.  Plane crashes are rare, but it only takes poor maintenance, bad weather, or just a stupid mistake.

I'm currently leaning in this direction too. Plane crashes are relatively rare and crashes due to terrorism rarer still despite some very public examples. It's a good one for the media because you have the shock of X hundred dead in one go which always sells copy. The fact that no-one seems to have claimed responsibility would suggest to me that it's a dull but fatal fuckup.

And Iranian migrating to Germany? They seemed to have been taking the long route.

I've heard that all the phones still work on that plane but nobody is picking up.
Indirect travel sounds smart when you are emigrating without permission and plan to apply for asylum.

We dropped a cell phone in a HCl slurry tank once.  It registered as "on" for two days.

If the plane crashed and didn't burn up entirely, the cellphones would be on until they ran out of juice.

[Junkenstein]

While I do note the above suspicious things, I'm going to ascribe a higher probability to an accidental than intentional crash.  Call it a gut feeling.

I'm gonna go with this for the moment.  Plane crashes are rare, but it only takes poor maintenance, bad weather, or just a stupid mistake.

I'm currently leaning in this direction too. Plane crashes are relatively rare and crashes due to terrorism rarer still despite some very public examples. It's a good one for the media because you have the shock of X hundred dead in one go which always sells copy. The fact that no-one seems to have claimed responsibility would suggest to me that it's a dull but fatal fuckup.

And Iranian migrating to Germany? They seemed to have been taking the long route.

I've heard that all the phones still work on that plane but nobody is picking up.
Indirect travel sounds smart when you are emigrating without permission and plan to apply for asylum.

Indirect travel sounds smart but in reality it raises a lot of eyebrows at customs checkpoints. Particularly when there's no real connection between destinations. It's a fairly reliable indicator of smuggling however. Asylum seekers tend to be much more direct in their travelling to their country of choice. For most in that situation, the main problem is getting there in the first place.

[Cain]

http://atimes.com/atimes/Southeast_Asia/SEA-01-120314.html

The search for the missing Malaysia Airlines' Boeing 777-200 has now become almost as bizarre as the disappearance of the aircraft itself with authorities now saying it may not only have reversed course, but flew 500 kilometers back across the Malaysian peninsula.

In a stunning turn of events, the Malaysian Air Force claimed Flight 370, carrying 239 passengers and crew, was last detected on radar crossing the northern end of the Malacca Strait at 2.40 am, more than an hour after it lost contact over the South China Sea.

But with the Indonesians and civilian radar operators unable to confirm the new radar track and air force chief Rodzali Daud saying he had been misquoted, it still left open the question why the pilot could not send a distress signal or otherwise communicate he was in trouble?

It was the air force which raised the possibility of a turn-back in the first place. That was later given fresh impetus by the decision to switch part of the international search effort from the South China Sea to the western coast of Malaysia and the peninsular itself.

With so many people speaking at cross-purposes, Malaysia's handling of the crisis is coming under increasing scrutiny. Critics believe it is now time for Kuala Lumpur to pool all available resources and involve foreign governments in more than just the search.

One thing seems clear: only when the wreckage is found will experts be able to determine how an aircraft with an unsurpassed safety record could vanish in clear skies long after reaching cruising altitude at 35,000 feet on its six-hour flight from Kuala Lumpur to Beijing.

But, in the absence of a Mayday and any real clarity about its flight path, investigators are working on a gamut of theories ranging from catastrophic electrical or structural failure to pilot suicide, a hijack - or a mid-air explosion.

[LMNO]

Had to be done.

[Reginald Ret]

Had to be done.

Hell, it is getting to be equally likely as half of the other explanations.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

No.

Nigel.

[LMNO]

"The airplane has been found, but it's got an enormous dildo rammed right through it."

[The Good Reverend Roger]

"The airplane has been found, but it's got an enormous dildo rammed right through it."

NO

NO

DA PLANE EES DA DILDO

[/metalocalypse]

[The Good Reverend Roger]

The Marcabian Fleet has no comment on the disappearance of any recent Aircraft. However, our Minister for Subjugation and Earthling Propaganda would like to express his deepest condolences to the families of those lost.

And IF a Marcabian DC-10 DID accidentally collide with that plane well that's just tough titty and you'll just have to deal with it.

DEAR ALIEN SWINE:

Please focus your sensors on the area known as "Arlington Cemetery".  You will notice that the headstones spell out "There's plenty more where THESE came from".  We breed like rabbits.  We make intoxicants out of rotten food, on purpose.  We can survive traumatic amputation and continue to fight for hours or days.  Violence is programmed into our brain stems.  We are the trailer park of the galaxy, and we've crammed 7.23 billion of us on this planet, and provided no adult supervision.  We are persistance predators, much like Jason Vorhees.

So this is your first, last, and only warning:  Fuck Off.  Or we will fucking EAT you the moment you land.

Yours truly,
The only honest man on Terra.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I din't do it

Why everybody gotta always look at me when this shit happens.