News:

Several times a month, I will be in a store aisle reaching for something and feel a hand going up the inside of my thigh. When I turn around to find myself alone with a woman, and ask her if she would prefer me to hold still so she can get a better feel for the situation, oftentimes she will act "shocked" claiming nothing had happened, it must be somebody else...

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RWHN's Sit-Down Comedy

Started by AFK, July 12, 2007, 02:10:54 PM

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Jenne



You sayin' her lip rip ain't right, Mang?

BADGE OF HONOR

The Jerk On Bike rolled his eyes and tossed the waffle back over his shoulder--before it struck the ground, a stout, disconcertingly monkey-like dog sprang into the air and snatched it, and began to masticate it--literally--for the sound it made was like a homonculus squatting on the floor muttering "masticate masticate masticate".

Mangrove

That's the cover!

When you get really close to it, you see that the photo hasn't been touched. In fact, Paliners were complaining to Newsweek for that very reason.

Moustache was an exaggeration for comic effect. However, I stand by my original contention: She's NED FLANDERS!!  :x
What makes it so? Making it so is what makes it so.

AFK

Holy hell that's frightening. 
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Jenne


Mangrove

What makes it so? Making it so is what makes it so.

Jenne


Suu

Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

AFK

Hey, what does an Iraqi Journalist always have to do after work?

Re-boot!

:rimshot:
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

AFK

Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean , two prawns were
swimming around in the sea.

One called Justin and the other called Christian.

The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that
inhabited the area.

Finally one day Justin said to Christian, 'I'm fed up with being a
prawn; I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being
eaten.'

A large mysterious cod appeared and said, 'Your wish is granted'

Lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.

Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old
mate.

Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely.

All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them.

Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his
sad plight.

While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought
perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn.

He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he
found himself turned back into a prawn.

With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam back to his friends and
bought them all a cocktail.

(The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse).

Looking around the gathering at the reef he realised he couldn't see his old
pal.

'Where's Christian?' he asked.

'He's at home, still distraught that his best friend changed sides to the
enemy & became a shark', came the reply.

Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he
set off to Christian's abode.

As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back.

He banged on the door and shouted, 'It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out
and see me again.'

Christian replied, 'No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy,
and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner.'

Justin cried back 'No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed.'.........

'I've found Cod. I'm a Prawn again, Christian'
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

hooplala

I do love a shaggy dog.

Hey did you ever write up an Aristocrats joke when I had that thread going a long time ago? 
"Soon all of us will have special names" — Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." — Bob Dylan?

"Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)"
— Walt Whitman

LMNO

I think I just threw up in my pants.

AFK

I have to say I'm drawing a blank on that one.  But knowing how my motivation works, I probably didn't.  Where was the thread?  
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

AFK

Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

hooplala

My memory of this was a bit off... I thought for some reason that a few people wrote one, but it seems it was really just me and the Other Anonymous.  And I don't really care for mine anymore... do a better one!

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=7089.0
"Soon all of us will have special names" — Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." — Bob Dylan?

"Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.)"
— Walt Whitman