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Rev Roger, MSY26: The Forces of Light

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, March 29, 2008, 04:51:26 AM

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The Good Reverend Roger

March 29, 2008, 04:51:26 AM
The City has more than it's share of mentally ill and/or homeless folks.  This is due to two facts:  One, they migrate here because they won't freeze to death in the winter, and the second is that The City does its best to keep them alive, by doing things such as providing them with water in the summer, etc.

Of course, this adds a surreal quality to The City, and - frankly - sometimes it's hard to tell which are the insane and which are the "normal" people.

For example, I was sitting in front of a bistro on Congress at lunchtime, watching stressed out financial geeks and cube warriors hurrying to get their lunch in the scant 30 minutes they are allotted for nourishing themselves...And as they stride by, a man dressed in the ragged remains of a minister's black shirt and collar was exhorting them.  I could make out some of what he's saying.

"We've got to get out of this trap!", he was screaming, "There is a better way!  Flee The City while you can!  DON'T YOU PEOPLE SEE THAT YOU'RE IN HELL?  Are you all BLIND?  Forsake Mammon, and come to the light!  You're HUMANS, dammit!  You aren't MACHINES!"

Of course, people walked by, looking around him, as people will when accosted by maniacs on the street.  He stood there with his bible open, hollering at the zombies around him, but the zombies would not listen.

By 1:10 PM, the streets were once again empty, the walking dead having returned to their cubicle sepulchers.  The ragged preacher approached me, and hit me up for a "donation".  What could I do?  This was a fellow Man of the Cloth.  I handed him a ten, and he told me Jesus would bless me.  Then he walked off down the street.

So who's the nut?

A few seconds later, the bistro's owner came running out, and apologized for my having been bothered by that worthless bum, he would have done something, but he was making a drink for another customer.  Looking at him, I saw a Saint Michael medal hanging around his neck, so I asked, "Are you Catholic?"

"Yes.  Why do you ask?"

"Well", I replied, "what makes you so sure he was a bum?  Do you expect that angels would always show up in immaculate linens with big, feathery wings?"

The man just stared at me for a moment, and then said, "You're nuts, too.  Get out."

I shrugged, and stood up, accidentally booting him in the crotch.  He fell like he'd been pole-axed (Remember, kids:  A properly applied sucker punch will usually put people in a position to listen to you!) and curled up in a ball.

"That'll teach you to fool with the forces of light!", I snarled, and stepped over him, walking away.  I had no choice, really.  This man was obviously demonically possessed, and nothing drives out demons like a engineer boot to the testicles.

I love The City.

Or kill me.





" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Idem

#2
March 29, 2008, 07:53:16 AM
 :lol:

Payne

#3
March 29, 2008, 09:59:12 AM
I had to apply a well placed boot-to-groin last night. I thought of you as I did it.

Does that make me Teh Gay?

Also, sweet writing. I haven't been so drawn into one of your pieces since your earlier days.

Thurnez Isa

#4
March 29, 2008, 10:45:32 AM
 :lulz:
Through me the way to the city of woe, Through me the way to everlasting pain, Through me the way among the lost.
Justice moved my maker on high.
Divine power made me, Wisdom supreme, and Primal love.
Before me nothing was but things eternal, and eternal I endure.
Abandon all hope, you who enter here.
Dante

P3nT4gR4m

#5
March 29, 2008, 11:37:08 AM
Rog I hate you and everything but I can't help saying this MSY series is shaping up to be a motherfucking bible!

2000 years from now I can see the world at war over an MSY, rewritten beyond recognition.

I am filled with awe  :fap:

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Triple Zero

#6
March 29, 2008, 01:47:43 PM
:D
awesoem
Ex-Soviet Bloc Sexual Attack Swede of Tomorrow™
e-prime disclaimer: let it seem fairly unclear I understand the apparent subjectivity of the above statements. maybe.

INFORMATION SO POWERFUL, YOU ACTUALLY NEED LESS.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

#7
March 29, 2008, 05:17:39 PM
Fabulous.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."

The Good Reverend Roger

#8
March 29, 2008, 07:55:07 PM
Quote from: Payne on March 29, 2008, 09:59:12 AM
I had to apply a well placed boot-to-groin last night. I thought of you as I did it.

Does that make me Teh Gay?

Also, sweet writing. I haven't been so drawn into one of your pieces since your earlier days.

Thanks.  I needed the hiatus, though.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Requia ☣

#9
March 29, 2008, 08:25:30 PM
So is there an MSY1-MSY23?
Inflatable dolls are not recognized flotation devices.

Golden Applesauce

#10
March 29, 2008, 10:26:09 PM
EXCELLENCE!
Q: How regularly do you hire 8th graders?
A: We have hired a number of FORMER 8th graders.

The Good Reverend Roger

#11
March 29, 2008, 11:31:03 PM
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

B_M_W

#12
March 29, 2008, 11:54:26 PM
God. Fuck, yes.
One by one, we break the sheep from their Iron Bar Prisons and expand their imaginations, make them think for themselves. In turn, they break more from their prisons. Eventually, critical mass is reached. Our key word: Resolve. Evangelize with compassion and determination. And realize that there will be few in the beginning. We are hand picking our successors. They are the future of Discordianism. Let us guide our future with intelligence.

     --Reverse Brainwashing: A Guide http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=9801.0

6.5 billion Buddhas walking around.

99.xxxxxxx% forgot they are Buddha.

Requia ☣

#13
March 30, 2008, 12:28:16 AM
Dammit, now I need to actually register over there.
Inflatable dolls are not recognized flotation devices.

The Good Reverend Roger

#14
March 30, 2008, 12:31:54 AM
Quote from: Requiem on March 30, 2008, 12:28:16 AM
Dammit, now I need to actually register over there.

Boo hoo hoo.

I'll approve your account.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.
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