Indecision 08 Wingnut thread

[BADGE OF HONOR]

AHAHAAH I just saw a McCain ad where he said he was going to "battle big oil"


I laughed so hard I choked.  Now my throat hurts.  I should sue that fucker for my pain and suffering.

[Cain]

Maybe he meant "battle for big oil"?

Also, Obama is an "uppity black man", according to the Florida gated-community residing, poor man's Goebbels, Richard Littlejohn.

http://www.johannhari.com/archive/article.php?id=1358

Not really worth noting, except to point out our own racists, trying to be clever, and failing.

[Cain]

Because its too good not to mention again

http://noquarterusa.net/blog/

Just all of it.  Every link, every article, every stupid banner....all of it.  Its the epitome of wingnuttery from the "sensible" left.  No conspiracy theory is too lunatic, nor GOP talking point too vile, for these cultists to repeat.  Why?  God only knows.  Hillary has conceded the nomination, so the only explanation is that they want to derail the Obama campaign out of spite or insanity.

[Cain]

Alternet is bringing the thunder again

http://www.alternet.org/story/95649/the_right%27s_five_most_hilariously_boneheaded_anti-obama_smears/

SMEAR #1: OBAMA IS A COMMIE NAZI!

Origins: While accusing Democrats of being commies has been a time-honored American tradition dating back the McCarthy era, the Right has breathed ingenious new life into this old standard by tracing Obama's commie origins back to his pre-fetus years. For as the National Review's Lisa Schiffren deftly notes, Obama's father is black and his mother is white. Why is this important, you ask? Because "for a white woman to marry a black man in 1958 ... there was almost inevitably a connection to explicit Communist politics." Wowsers! So even Obama's very conception was forged out of a mutual hatred for capitalism!

[...]

The flip side of this vast commie conspiracy, of course, is the idea that Obama is actually simultaneously positioning himself to be the next Adolf Hitler. While it may seem counterintuitive to think of a black guy as the newest incarnation of an ideology that hated black people, consider that Obama gave a speech in Germany and printed campaign fliers that were written ... IN GERMAN!!!! To make matters worse, noted blogger Dr. Melissa Clouthier, Obama and Hitler have used campaign literature that looks sort of similar, if you ignore the fact that it doesn't look anything alike at all.

[...]

The notion that Obama is a fascist is not wholly accepted by everyone on the right, however. John Ray of the Stop the ACLU blog, for example, thinks that calling Obama a fascist does fascism a great disservice, since at least "fascists were patriotic and Obama is the sort of America-hater that is now typical of the Left." Well, you can't please everyone, I guess.

SMEAR #2: BERNIE MAC/LUDACRIS/SOME OTHER BLACK ENTERTAINER WILL BRING DOWN OBAMA'S CAMPAIGN!

Origins: When Bill Clinton first denounced Sister Soulja in 1992, the goal was to help the public understand that obscure black entertainers do not, in fact, reflect the views of Democratic presidential candidates. Unfortunately, this dynamic has not played out as Clinton envisioned it, as John Kerry was repeatedly called upon to reject the views of Whoopi Goldberg and Barack Obama has been forced to renounce just about every black entertainer who has supported his candidacy. One of the more recent examples is comedian Bernie Mac, who made a rather tasteless and sexist joke during an Obama campaign event. While Obama immediately chastised Mac for his crude humor, many on the Right saw it as a great opportunity to ratfuck his campaign by driving a wedge between Obama and supporters of Hillary Clinton.

[...]

One wonders why the Obama campaign hasn't yet released a blanket statement saying, "We categorically denounce, renounce and reject any and all controversial remarks made by any black celebrity ever at any point in time on this or other planets." It would honestly save them a lot of time.

[...]

SMEAR #3: OBAMA'S BIRTH CERTIFICATE PROVES ?

Origins: While the Internet is full of crazy rumors, some crazy rumors are indeed crazier than other crazy rumors. A good rule of thumb for any rumormonger should be that when Charles Johnson of Rathergate fame won't even take the time to analyze some document's kerning on your behalf, then your rumor is beyond crazy and should be dropped faster than Harriet Miers' career as a Supreme Court justice.

Nevertheless, a lack of support from "mainstream" conservative media outlets and blogs didn't deter some of the Right's very dimmest of bulbs from trying to prove that Barack Obama forged his birth certificate in order to cover up. ... Well, we still aren't really sure. The National Review's Jim Geraghty, who was skeptical of the birth certificate rumors, summarized the key rumors as such: Obama was born in Kenya and thus not eligible to become president; Obama's real middle name is actually Mohammed; and finally, that Obama's real first name is "Barry" and not "Barack." Additionally, blogger Suitably Flip speculated that the "full-length document might indicate Obama's parents were avowedly unmarried at the time of his birth." Or as one of my friends put it, "Maybe they're hoping to learn that Obama's real first name is Damien and that his mother was a jackal."

[...]

SMEAR #4: OBAMA EXERCISES TOO MUCH AND DOESN'T GORGE HIS FACE WITH FATTY, UNHEALTHY GOO!

Origins: On Aug. 1, Wall Street Journal readers were treated to a report by Amy Chozick that asked the vitally important question of whether Barack Obama was in too good shape to identify with most Americans. "In a nation in which 66% of the voting-age population is overweight and 32% is obese, could Sen. Obama's skinniness be a liability?" she wondered to no one in particular. "Despite his visits to waffle houses, ice cream parlors and greasy-spoon diners around the country, his slim physique just might have some Americans wondering whether he is truly like them."

[...]

You really have to hand it to the right-wing attack machine: They've successfully transformed exercising and eating healthy food from admirable habits into crippling character flaws. It seems that in modern America, being fat, drunk and stupid is a good way to go through life.

[...]

SMEAR #5: OBAMA WANTS YOUR CHILD TO LEARN SPANISH!

Origin: It all started out innocently enough: During a campaign event, Barack Obama said that while immigrants coming to live in the United States should learn English, parents should also make sure that their children learn Spanish. Now, you would think that Republicans would support such a sentiment. After all, if the free trade pacts that they've advocated have really made global economic interaction more important, it might be a good thing for Americans to learn the language that is spoken by the majority of countries in South and Central America. You know, because those countries comprise some of our biggest trading partners in the Western hemisphere.

But alas! In modern American conservatism's constant internal struggle of greed vs. stupidity, stupidity scored a resounding victory. As soon as Obama's pro-Spanish speech hit the YouTube circuit, right-wing blogs and Web sites erupted into a hysteria not seen since Ken Starr was writing pornographic tracts about Bill Clinton's genitalia. "Our education system is crazy enough with all these liberal, feel-good programs," said Bobby Eberle of GOPUSA. "Now, despite the fact that the rest of the world is learning English, he says that American kids should learn Spanish? What? Learn Spanish?"

[...]

Of course, the absolute dimmest comment about Spanishgate came from the National Review's Kathryn Jean Lopez, who used Obama's pro-Spanish comments to deliver a stinging critique of his big speech in Germany by confidently proclaiming that "if Obama could go to Germany and give a speech in English and be not only understood but well received, why does he say we all need to learn another language?" Zing! Similarly, why do we teach our kids math nowadays when they have calculators to do it for them? Game, set, match, liberal elitists! That'll learn you to teach our children no foreign language a-spoken by foreigners!

[Iason Ouabache]

The "He exercises too much" smear doesn't make any sense considering how often Bush has been photographed exercising. Maybe Obama needs to fall down a couple times.  Then he'll be more electable.

[Cain]

The "He exercises too much" smear doesn't make any sense considering how often Bush has been photographed exercising. Maybe Obama needs to fall down a couple times.  Then he'll be more electable.

Thats because when Bush does it, he is showing his physical fitness and how he is manly enough to lead, in accordance with the values of the Heartland.

When Obama does it, its because he's a jeering elitist who wants to make fun of bovine America, many of whom reside in the Heartland.

[fomenter]

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/uselection2008/barackobama/2595688/Barack-Obama-is-my-inspiration-says-lost-brother.html

obama's brother lives in a shack

[Jenne]

The "He exercises too much" smear doesn't make any sense considering how often Bush has been photographed exercising. Maybe Obama needs to fall down a couple times.  Then he'll be more electable.

Thats because when Bush does it, he is showing his physical fitness and how he is manly enough to lead, in accordance with the values of the Heartland.

When Obama does it, its because he's a jeering elitist who wants to make fun of bovine America, many of whom reside in the Heartland.

Good god you have your fingers on the pulse!  Well said.  And sadly enough, very true.

[Cain]

The "He exercises too much" smear doesn't make any sense considering how often Bush has been photographed exercising. Maybe Obama needs to fall down a couple times.  Then he'll be more electable.

Thats because when Bush does it, he is showing his physical fitness and how he is manly enough to lead, in accordance with the values of the Heartland.

When Obama does it, its because he's a jeering elitist who wants to make fun of bovine America, many of whom reside in the Heartland.

Good god you have your fingers on the pulse!  Well said.  And sadly enough, very true.

Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster.  And when you gaze long enough into the Heartland, the Heartland gaze back into you.

[Cain]

WINGNUTOSPHERE ALERT LEVEL: CHEETOS

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/08/21/politics/main4372096.shtml

(CBS/ AP) A threatening letter containing an unidentified white powder was received at John McCain's campaign offices in Denver, Colorado, CBS News has learned.

A second letter sent to a McCain campaign office in New Hampshire initially was reported to contain a white substance. Authorities said that was a false alarm and there was no powder in that envelope.

At least 19 people were examined at hospitals or were quarantined outside the Colorado office while authorities tried to determine whether the powder was hazardous.

Andy Lyon of Parker South Metro Fire Rescue Authority said the return address on the envelope listed the Arapahoe Detention Center and the name of an inmate. He didn't release the name.

Lyon said the first line of the letter used threatening language, but he refused to give any details.

McCain's campaign had said the letter sent to the Manchester, N.H., office also contained a threatening language and white powder.

But Malcolm Wiley, a Secret Service spokesman in Colorado, said there was no powder in the New Hampshire envelope. He said he did not know about the content of the letter.

Wiley said the letter had a Denver return address, which alarmed staffers in Manchester because they had heard about the Colorado incident.

Jim Barnett, McCain's New England campaign manager, said it's unusual for the New Hampshire office to get a letter from Denver.

"That was really the only suspicious thing about the letter, and our national headquarters advised, out of an abundance of caution for our staff and volunteers, that we have the authorities check it out," he said. "We did and it was deemed safe."

A government official familiar with the investigation said the New Hampshire letter was a false alarm. The official said authorities believe the Denver letter was a hoax because it appeared to have been sent from a jail.

Both the New Hampshire and Colorado offices were evacuated.

Lyon said about 40 people were evacuated from the Colorado building, but it contains several offices and businesses, and he did not know how many people had been in the McCain office.

Seven people drove themselves to Sky Ridge Medical Center, but none showed any symptoms of exposure to a toxic substance, hospital spokeswoman Linda Watson said.

Twelve people were quarantined outside the Colorado office, including three police officers, two firefighters and seven civilians, Lyon said.

He said Park South Metro firefighters found very little powder when they arrived.

"There were maybe a couple of grains of something inside an envelope and they had to kind of work to get a sample," he said.

Bruce Williamson of the Arapahoe County Sheriff's Department said a hazmat team was searching the building. He said authorities believe the substance was confined within the structure.

Williamson said authorities took the incident "very seriously" because the Democratic National Convention begins Monday in Denver and McCain is the presumed GOP candidate.

Postal Inspector Jo Jan Henderson said agents from her office were at the scene. FBI officials did not immediately return calls.

------------------------------------

Whoever did this is a fucking moron.

[singer]

there is already some speculation it was done by a McCain supporter to pull the spotlight back on the Republican campaign... in which case.... still a moron... with really premature timing

[LMNO]

Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster.  And when you gaze long enough into the Heartland, the Heartland gaze back into you.

[Jenne]

there is already some speculation it was done by a McCain supporter to pull the spotlight back on the Republican campaign... in which case.... still a moron... with really premature timing

Holy shit people are stupid.  Feh.

I'd much rather it was a hate-crime than this fucked up shit.  Neither is good, but dammit, faking a poisoning so people vote for McCain? 

Fuck the issues, eh? 

[Jenne]

Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster.  And when you gaze long enough into the Heartland, the Heartland gaze back into you.

That was an awesome post.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

The "He exercises too much" smear doesn't make any sense considering how often Bush has been photographed exercising. Maybe Obama needs to fall down a couple times.  Then he'll be more electable.

Thats because when Bush does it, he is showing his physical fitness and how he is manly enough to lead, in accordance with the values of the Heartland.

When Obama does it, its because he's a jeering elitist who wants to make fun of bovine America, many of whom reside in the Heartland.

Good god you have your fingers on the pulse!  Well said.  And sadly enough, very true.

Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster.  And when you gaze long enough into the Heartland, the Heartland gaze back into you.

Shiiiiit, yes.