Rev Roger, MSY32: A Shit-Rain of DUMB.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Stella is of The Doomed.  There is no shame in this; plenty of good people are doomed these days, as the nation sinks slowly into the swamp, as the lights flicker and dim.  She is a young, good looking hippie-Goth chick with a  bit of drive, and a more than fair amount of brains...except when it comes to men.

When I met her, she had just started dating Ronnie, a guy that strongly resembled a lizard, only without the work ethic that is possessed by, say, your average alligator on a hot summer day.  He was also entirely self-absorbed...a half-bright sociopath with a persecution complex and absolutely no regard for anyone but himself.

Long story short, she finally gets rid of the jackass...then finds Bubba.  Bubba isn't actually his name...but it should be.  Bubba was a military spouse who himself failed in the military, and then attached himself, lamprey-style, to an Air Force junior NCO by the name of Susan.  Bubba and Susan have a kid, and then Bubba decides that Susan is a domineering bitch, because she expects him to do outrageous things like watch the kid and keep the house clean, while she is at work...when everyone KNOWS his job is to play MMO games on the internet all day.

So Bubba "leaves" Susan, but doesn't actually move out...instead, he finds Stella, who – being a smarter than average primate – should be expected to see exactly what's coming, having just escaped an identical jackass.  Susan, being no rocket scientist herself, allows him to stay under her roof, and continues to try to get him back.  Many Jerry Springer-esque hijinks ensue, as you would imagine.  Bubba wants custody...and if, by some miracle of an evil god, he gets it, Stella will wind up in the exact same boat as Susan:  Working all damn day, and then raising HIS kid, changing diapers that have been dirty for HOURS, because he can't be bothered.

Watching Stella get dragged into this is, of course, like watching the Titanic back up for another run at the iceberg.  So the other day, I'm busy giving her shit about the whole sordid mess, when she says, "Nobody said shit about Ronnie for THREE YEARS, when you all saw what was going on!  So why is EVERYONE so down on Bubba?

Good question.  Why, indeed?

Probably because if ANY of us had said something about Ronnie, she wouldn't have listened, right?  Because, hell, she isn't listening NOW, is she?  Fact:  You can't save anyone.  All you can do is give them the best advice you can, and let them get all annoyed at you...It won't help, but at least you can feel all smug and vindicated when the whole sorry mess descends into some horrible redneck soap opera.  And The Good Reverend, being a Rain God, has more prescience than most.  I can SEE the whole nightmare developing, like a million ton ball of shit rolling down the hill...an unstoppable freight train full of fail, and there's Stella walking down the tracks, fingers jammed in her ears, eyes closed, yelling "LALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"  I am like Cassandra, without the tits.  I am ALWAYS right about these things, and NOBODY ever listens.

Why do otherwise-intelligent people do dumb shit like this?  Why would a smart young woman plan on pulling up stakes to move halfway across the country to live with a twenty-something loser who has moved back to North Carolina to live with his folks because he has worked precisely 2 months out of the last 2-3 years?  I swear to God, it makes me crazy just thinking about it.  I mean, there is a certain type of person I expect this from, and Stella isn't that type of person.

There's probably something I'm missing here, and it's probably right under my nose.  I mean, is there anything we can LEARN from this nonsense, that we could apply to the mass of domesticated primates in general?  Perhaps just a hint of the reason that otherwise clever primates do things like elect Nixon and Bush, or bet on the Oakland Raiders?

The upshot of this, of course, is that one of the few people in The City that I don't hate is leaving for North Carolina in two months.  This happens, of course...I lost my friend Cheryl in a similar way a few years back, but I never really felt too badly about that.  She, after all, went on to bigger and better things, and wound up marrying a really nice guy.  Sure, I miss her, but I'm happy for her.  In THIS case, however, my friend is running toward a mess of colossal proportions, and there isn't much I can say or do to stop her.  Love, it seems, isn't just blind, it's DUMB, too.

Even smart people are stupid about incredibly important things.

You can't do anything about it.

Or kill me.

[Adios]

We all have to learn from our own mistakes. The experiences of others aren't a reality.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

We all have to learn from our own mistakes. The experiences of others aren't a reality.

Yep.  Still, it hurts my head to watch smart people do dumb shit.

[Von Melee]

Maybe it's a subconscious desire of smart people to see themselves get knocked down a peg. They want to be sure that they are capable of committing the same mistakes all the rest of the monkeys are making.

Or maybe, and more llikely, they want to make so many mistakes that someone takes it upon themself to 'save' that person.

Either way, it stems from a egotistical desire to gain attention. Like a problem child, the goal is only about attention, regardless of positive or negative connotations. The point is, "HA HA HA. Look at me, I'm still important to [insert name(s) here]. Therefore, I am important, period."

Or maybe I'm just an insane pineapple raving senselessly.

Lightbulb. Cardboard. Pudding.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Maybe it's a subconscious desire of smart people to see themselves get knocked down a peg. They want to be sure that they are capable of committing the same mistakes all the rest of the monkeys are making.

Or maybe, and more llikely, they want to make so many mistakes that someone takes it upon themself to 'save' that person.

Either way, it stems from a egotistical desire to gain attention. Like a problem child, the goal is only about attention, regardless of positive or negative connotations. The point is, "HA HA HA. Look at me, I'm still important to [insert name(s) here]. Therefore, I am important, period."

Or maybe I'm just an insane pineapple raving senselessly.

Lightbulb. Cardboard. Pudding.

Or "Look!  I found a wounded bird!"

[Von Melee]

It may go deeper than that. There are two paths to "Look, I found a wounded bird!"

1. I must to be going and fixing now!

2. I shall grind it into the dirt!

I tend to go with the second option if the "wounded bird" bites.

[Jasper]

This is relevant to me.  I've recently given up the romantic notion that people who aren't literally asking to be helped can be. 

You can't rape the willing, and you can't help the fucked.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

This is relevant to me.  I've recently given up the romantic notion that people who aren't literally asking to be helped can be. 

You can't rape the willing, and you can't help the fucked.

And you can't save The Doomed.

[Jasper]

Sorry to hear about your friend though.  I was always partial to Stellas.

[Bu🤠ns]

It sounds an aweful lot like a fear of being lonely.  I wonder if Stella feels like she doesn't have an alternative choice.  It's like she desires the shear presence of another regardless of how he affects her just as long as the sag of bones is actually there.  I used to date a girl who, despite the fact that there was just nothing between us at all, would smother the hell out of me just so i'd be "there."

[Payne]

Fuck. It's true though.

It's not enough to be intelligent, you got to have the fire in your gut and big fuck off claws on your hands to stop from sliding down the slippery slope of dumbfuck faildom.

I hope this gets resolved agreeably, but like you, I know it won't.

[BADGE OF HONOR]

Maybe she thinks Bubba is the best she can get?  Perhaps she's so afraid of being alone for the rest of her life (which we've all been conditioned to think of as BAD BAD FAILURE) that she's reaching for what she can get immediately, instead of waiting to find someone worth her while. 

I don't know, since I'm not her.  But fear is the great motivator. 

[Jasper]

It's plausible.  I've heard the "hook up while you've got the looks" line enough to know people buy it.

[LMNO]

Sounds like Stella is missing a spine. 

That's not meant to be insulting.  When it comes to relationships, most of us monkeys don't have spines.




By the way Roger, I have a musical side project, where one of the tracks is inspired by the "The Whole World's Against Me!" story.  Do you mind if I call the entire album "Millions of Screaming Yahoos"?

[hooplala]

"Nobody said shit about Ronnie for THREE YEARS, when you all saw what was going on!  So why is EVERYONE so down on Bubba?"

Oh good grief.