Official February Shit List Thread

[Jasper]

Fucking...  Ugh.  I hope I die on a January.

[Luna]

Fucking...  Ugh.  I hope I die on a January.

I was hoping to die while fu... Um... Nevermind.

[Jasper]

I keep hearing women say that. But do they ever think of how the guy would feel?

...

The answer is that he would feel like Zeus.  He would tell people at bars, a glint of pride in his eyes.

[LMNO]

Fucking...  Ugh.  I hope I die on a January.

On a January, you say...






(Questionable NWS link)

[Jasper]

Yeah, exactly like that. 

[Richter]

I keep hearing women say that. But do they ever think of how the guy would feel?

...

The answer is that he would feel like Zeus.  He would tell people at bars, a glint of pride in his eyes.

"SO I'm banging this nymph.  Well, actually it was three nymphs.  Not to brag or anything, it jsut kind of worked out that one time.  ANYWAYS, this one nymph, she's going at it like a freaking dirty milkmaid, and accidentally keels over and dies on top of me, this idiot smile on her face.  I've heard this happens to nymphs.  Somethign about the wrong diet and too much tiem spent as a tree, hardens the arteries if they don't take care of themselves, really terrible.  Buy yeah man, she freakin' dies right there on top of me.

I'm kind of like 'Oh fuck.'.  she died happy and all, but it's totally going to spoil the mood.  Then I remember I'm a GOD, right?  Zeus here for crying out loud.  I got this shit.  So I turn her into pure dark chocolate. 

Her friends are a little spooked, but then they get into this.  One starts nibbling on her ear, the other goes downtown, so to speak, so I'm jsut like:  'Wait!  Where's the cream filling??!'

Off the hook I tell yeah, good times."

[Suu]

I keep hearing women say that. But do they ever think of how the guy would feel?

...

The answer is that he would feel like Zeus.  He would tell people at bars, a glint of pride in his eyes.

"SO I'm banging this nymph.  Well, actually it was three nymphs.  Not to brag or anything, it jsut kind of worked out that one time.  ANYWAYS, this one nymph, she's going at it like a freaking dirty milkmaid, and accidentally keels over and dies on top of me, this idiot smile on her face.  I've heard this happens to nymphs.  Somethign about the wrong diet and too much tiem spent as a tree, hardens the arteries if they don't take care of themselves, really terrible.  Buy yeah man, she freakin' dies right there on top of me.

I'm kind of like 'Oh fuck.'.  she died happy and all, but it's totally going to spoil the mood.  Then I remember I'm a GOD, right?  Zeus here for crying out loud.  I got this shit.  So I turn her into pure dark chocolate. 

Her friends are a little spooked, but then they get into this.  One starts nibbling on her ear, the other goes downtown, so to speak, so I'm jsut like:  'Wait!  Where's the cream filling??!'

Off the hook I tell yeah, good times."

[Jasper]

Richter wins!  

  "I got this shit."

[Luna]

I keep hearing women say that. But do they ever think of how the guy would feel?

...

The answer is that he would feel like Zeus.  He would tell people at bars, a glint of pride in his eyes.

At that point, hardly my problem, now is it?  However, yes, I imagine that most men, once over the initial shock, would take bragging rights from that.

"SO I'm banging this nymph.  Well, actually it was three nymphs.  Not to brag or anything, it jsut kind of worked out that one time.  ANYWAYS, this one nymph, she's going at it like a freaking dirty milkmaid, and accidentally keels over and dies on top of me, this idiot smile on her face.  I've heard this happens to nymphs.  Somethign about the wrong diet and too much tiem spent as a tree, hardens the arteries if they don't take care of themselves, really terrible.  Buy yeah man, she freakin' dies right there on top of me.

I'm kind of like 'Oh fuck.'.  she died happy and all, but it's totally going to spoil the mood.  Then I remember I'm a GOD, right?  Zeus here for crying out loud.  I got this shit.  So I turn her into pure dark chocolate. 

Her friends are a little spooked, but then they get into this.  One starts nibbling on her ear, the other goes downtown, so to speak, so I'm jsut like:  'Wait!  Where's the cream filling??!'

Off the hook I tell yeah, good times."

Multiple conflicting comments on this one.  I'll have to go with:

(And he wonders why people ask if he's poly...)

And:

Chocolate, brilliant.   

[Richter]

Thanks all.

Multiple conflicting comments on this one.  I'll have to go with:

(And he wonders why people ask if he's poly...)

And:

Chocolate, brilliant.   

I like to think there's a differnce between promoting Larry Niven / F.M. Busby crazy alien wifeswap lifestyle and a quick vignette about a specific incident of Zeus getting REAL lucky. 

Then again, there are fine points to any perversion, whether it's of sexuality or sentiment.

[Luna]

Thanks all.

Multiple conflicting comments on this one.  I'll have to go with:

(And he wonders why people ask if he's poly...)

And:

Chocolate, brilliant.   

I like to think there's a differnce between promoting Larry Niven / F.M. Busby crazy alien wifeswap lifestyle and a quick vignette about a specific incident of Zeus getting REAL lucky. 

Then again, there are fine points to any perversion, whether it's of sexuality or sentiment.

There are always degrees.  And, hell, if writing or talking about stuff counted...  You forget what I used to do for a living.

[Earthbound Spirit]

February just sucked.  On to bigger and better things.....

[AFK]

March isn't shaping up to be too hot for the State of Maine.

Stupid idiot teabagger governor dumbass shithead!!!!

[Jenne]

February's still kicking my ass, from the grave as someone put it in the OB thread, but I'm getting a better attitude about it all.  I spent 2 of the last weekends the last month in bed (and NOT the good way!).  I plan to spend every weekend in March doing something FUCK YEAH AWESOME.

[Jenne]

I keep hearing women say that. But do they ever think of how the guy would feel?

...

The answer is that he would feel like Zeus.  He would tell people at bars, a glint of pride in his eyes.

"SO I'm banging this nymph.  Well, actually it was three nymphs.  Not to brag or anything, it jsut kind of worked out that one time.  ANYWAYS, this one nymph, she's going at it like a freaking dirty milkmaid, and accidentally keels over and dies on top of me, this idiot smile on her face.  I've heard this happens to nymphs.  Somethign about the wrong diet and too much tiem spent as a tree, hardens the arteries if they don't take care of themselves, really terrible.  Buy yeah man, she freakin' dies right there on top of me.

I'm kind of like 'Oh fuck.'.  she died happy and all, but it's totally going to spoil the mood.  Then I remember I'm a GOD, right?  Zeus here for crying out loud.  I got this shit.  So I turn her into pure dark chocolate. 

Her friends are a little spooked, but then they get into this.  One starts nibbling on her ear, the other goes downtown, so to speak, so I'm jsut like:  'Wait!  Where's the cream filling??!'

Off the hook I tell yeah, good times."

THIS was motherfucking brilliant.