I'm so badass, the thread.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

ITT: We tell people how unbelievably badass we are to increase our ePeen.

For example:
I'M SO BADASS I CAN FIELD STRIP ANY GLOCK PISTOL IN THE WORLD IN UNDER TWO MINUTES!!!

or

I'M SO BADASS MY CAR GOES FROM 0-60 IN 30 SECONDS! THAT'S RIGHT, 60. SEE YOU FAGGOTS IN MY REARVIEW!

[Jenne]

Do you fist cats, Fnordude?

(just making sure)

Also:  you don't post enough.  Your post count is a total lie.  In fact, that whole thing to the left of your post is a lie.

Also:  good to see you.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

You're not very good at this game...

[Jenne]

Good.

[Jenne]

FINE

I'M SO BADASS THAT PEOPLE WALK SIDEWAYS WHEN I WALK DOWN THE STREET  IN CASE THE RUSH BETWEEN MY MIGHTY THIGHS SWEEPS THEM OFF THEIR FEET.

I'M SO BADASS THAT WHEN I SNEEZE, ALL OF CHINA HITS THE FLOOR EN MASSE, COWERING IN FEAR.

I'M SO BADASS, BUSLOADS OF PILGRIMS FLOCK TO MY DOORSTEP, HOPING TO GAWD I'LL SPIT NEAR THEM AND THEY CAN USE IT FOR HOLY WATER.

[Shibboleet The Annihilator]

Later.

[Jenne]

  I played!

[Cramulus]

I JUST THREW MY CELL PHONE AT A TRUCK AND THE TRUCK EXPLODED AND MY PHONE STILL WORKS

TAKE THAT, FAGTRUCK

[Xooxe]

I'M SO MGD WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN I MISS YOU!

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

i'm so badass that chuck norris calls me sir

?

[Elder Iptuous]

I'm so Iptuous that my fuckin' iptuous is iptuous.

[Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ]

FRED

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

yo. i herd u liek squids
so i put a squid in your squid so you can squid while you squid

and then i sang a little song and i kicked myself in the baaaaaaaaaalls

[Verbal Mike]

Fred wins this thred.

Cram: Nokia, huh?

[P3nT4gR4m]

I'M SO BADASS I CAN LOOK YOU RIGHT IN THE EYE AND STAB YOU IN THE BACK

I'M SO BADASS PEOPLE HAVE BROKEN BASEBALL BATS ON MY BALLS AND I NEVER SO MUCH AS FLINCHED

I'M SO BADASS I ASSRAPE LIVE TIGERS AND THEY GODDAMN WELL LOVE IT

I'M SO BADASS YOU NEED TO SIGN A WAIVER BEFORE THEY'LL LET YOU WALK DOWN THE SAME STREET AS ME

I'M SO BADASS A SHAOLIN TRIBE OF NINJA BADASS MOTHERFUCKERS ONCE IMPLORED ME TO BE THEIR KING. THEY WOULDN'T GET OFF MY CASE ABOUT IT SO I KILLED EVERY LAST MOTHERFUCKIN ONE OF THEM.