TV Tropes, I hate you so much....

[Kai]

 I am trying so hard not to laugh loudly sitting here in my office, at which point all people in the building will know for certain that I am totally nuts. 

[The Wizard]

What... in god's name...is this? 

[LMNO]

Fuck you.  Fuck ALL of you.

But it was to late. I knew what I herd. I ran to the bathroom angrily, cring. Draco banged on the door. I whipped and whepped as my blody eyeliner streammed down my cheeks and made cool tears down my feces like Benji in the video for Girls and Bois (raven that is soo our video!). I TOOOK OUT A CIGARETE END STARTED TO smoke pot.

[Kai]

COOL TEARS DOWN MY FECES  

I'M DYING. 

[Cain]

Fuck you.  Fuck ALL of you.

But it was to late. I knew what I herd. I ran to the bathroom angrily, cring. Draco banged on the door. I whipped and whepped as my blody eyeliner streammed down my cheeks and made cool tears down my feces like Benji in the video for Girls and Bois (raven that is soo our video!). I TOOOK OUT A CIGARETE END STARTED TO smoke pot.

[Fredfredly ⊂(◉‿◉)つ]

OMG THIS IS HILARIOUS this person cant be serious 

[Cramulus]

we must concoct a way to measure fanfic.

this will be on the far end of the ruler.

[LMNO]

He committed suicide by slitting his wrists with a razor. He had raped them and stuff before too. They all got so depressed that they became goffik and converted to Stanism.

"OMFG" I yielded as I jumped up. "Why the fuck are u all here?"

"Enoby something is really fucked up." Draco said.

"OK but I need to put my fucking clothes on first." I shouted angrily.

"It's all right. We have to go now and you look kawaii anyway. Your so fucking beautiful." Draco said in a sexy voice.

"Oh all right." I said smiling. "But you have to tell me why your being all erective."

"I will I will." he said.

So I just put on some black eyeliner, black lipstick and red eyeshadow and white foundation. Then I came. We all went outside the Great Hal and looked in from a widow. A fucking prep called Britney from Griffindoor was standing next to us. She was wearing a pink mini and a Hilary Duff t-shirt so we put up our middle fingers at her. Inside the Great Hall we could see Dumbledork. Cornelia Fudged was there shouting at Dumbledore. Doris Rumbridge was there too.

"THIS CANNOT BE!" she shouted angrily. "THE SCHOOL MUST BE CLOSED!"

"THE BARK LORD IS PLANNING TO KILL THE STUDENTS!" yelled Cornelia Fudge.

"YOU ARE NOT FIT TO BE THE PRINCIPAL ANY LONGER!" yelled Rumbridge. "YOU ARE TOO OLD AND YOUR ALZHEIMERS IS DANGEROUS! YOU MUST RETRY OR VOLDEMORT WILL KILL YOUR STUDENTS!"

"Very well." Dumbledore said angrily. "Butt we cannot do this. We can't close the school. There is only one person who is capable of killing Voldemort and she is in the school. And her name is.............................................................................Enony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way."

I understand if you guys want to ban me.

[Cramulus]

ban you??

I want to strangle you

[LMNO]

plz stup flaming da story if u do ur a foken prep n ur jelous ok!11

[Pariah]

I'm going to pull your endocrine system out of your body
                            \\

[LMNO]

I sat between Darkness and Draco and opposite B'loody Mary. Crab and Goyle started 2 make some morbid jokes. They both looked exactly like Ville Vollo. I eight some Count Chocula and drank som blood from a cup. Then I herd someone shooting angrily. I looked behind me it was.........Vampire! He and Draco were shooting at eachother.

"Vampire, Draco WTF?" I asked.

"You fucking bustard!" yelled Draco at Vampire. "I want to shit next to her!1"

"No I do!" shouted.

"No she doesn't fucking like u, you son of a bitch!" yelled Draco.

"No fuck you motherfucker she laves me not you!" shouted Vampire. And then.................. he jumped on Draco! (no not in dat way u perv) They started to fight and beat up each other.

Dumbldore yelled at them but they didn't stop. All of a sudden...... a terrible man with red eyes and no nose flew in on his broomstick. He had no nose and was wearing a gray robe. All the glass in the window he flew thru fell apart. Britney that fucking prep started to cry. Vampire and Draco stopped fighting....I shopped eating....Everyone gasped. Da room fell silent......................Volzemort!

"Eboby.....Ebony......." Darth Valer sed evilly in his raspy voice. "Thou havfe failed ur mission. Now I shall kill thou and I shall kill Vampire as well. If thou does not kill him before then I shall kill Draco too!"

"Plz don't make me kill him plz!" I begged.

"No!" he laughed crudely. "Kill him, or I shall kill him anyway!" Then he flew away cackling.

I bust into tears. Draco and Vampire came to contort me. Suddenly my eyes rolled up so they looked all cool and gothic. I had a vision were I saw some lighting flash and then Voldremot coming to kill Draco while Draco slit his wrists in a depressed way.

"No!" I screamed sexily. Suddenly I locked up and stopped having the vision.

[Cramulus]

 
this is the complete opposite of tasting a fine wine

[Cain]

I love how the main character's name is even spelt incorrectly at time.

[LMNO]

I was so excited. I fellowed Draco wandering if we where going 2 do it again. We went outside and then we went into Draco's black car.

"Ebony what the fuck did Profesor Trevolry say." whispered Draco potting his gothic whit hand with bvlak nail polish on mine.

"She said she would tell me what the visions meant torromow." I grumbled in a sexy voice. He took out a heroin cabaret and spiked it, and gave it to me to spork. He started to fly the car into a tree. We went to the top of it. Draco put on some MCR.

I think I just shat myself.