Sweet and Painful Chicken

[Dimocritus]

This is probably my favorite thing to cook. It was a friend of mines recipe that I ripped off and modified to make it good (her recipe called for ketchup, which I abhor, and it wasn't spicy at all. It didn't use chicken, either, so now that I think about it...). All measurements are approximated because I usually do it all by eye.

You'll need:

Approx. two pounds of boneless chicken tenders (really, anything works here. I've done this with kielbasa and even burgers).

Around a half of a large onion

Two handfuls of mushrooms

Two good sized jalapenos

One habenero

about 5-6 oz. of steak sauce

Two cups of brown sugar.

Chop up your chicken into bite size pieces and chop up your vegetables (except the habenero, we'll need that later) to the desired size. Essentially, you're just going to throw the whole mix into a pan with a little oil (I prefer a cast iron pan for a lot of reasons. Maybe I'll explain them someday) and let the whole thing sizzle for a bit. If you want to saute your mushrooms and onions first, go right ahead. When the whole mix seems to be about two-thirds finished, mince your habenero into oblivion, then add it with the steak sauce and brown sugar to the mix. At this point you may want to turn your heat down a bit or cover the whole thing and let everything get all sticky. You want the sauce to cook down by about half (or whenever it looks good to you).

This dish is tricky because it's very sweet at first, but as soon as you get comfortable, it kicks you in the lips. The habenero only adds little flavor, It's mainly there to spice the whole thing up, so if the jalapenos are hot enough for you, then you should skip the habenero. Additionally, feel free to experiment with whatever vegetables you like, the ones listed here are just what I like.

Enjoy! (Or don't. At this point I don't give a crap.)   

[Dimocritus]

No one likes my chicken? 

[Jenne]

Sounds tasty--more or less hot bbq.

[BADGE OF HONOR]

Sounds like a shitload of sugar.

[Jenne]

I'd be inclined to cut the sugar by 1/2 or 2/3 if I was to make it, but a lot of bbq sauces have TONS of sugar in them.

[Dimocritus]

It's a very versatile recipe, so cutting the sugar down won't effect it too much, you'll just have to maybe add a little flour or something to thicken the sauce up or something.

[Jenne]

cooking sauces down usually does that...

[LMNO]

The easy out is always a cornstarch slurry.

Or file powder.

[Jenne]

Steak sauce and a bit of sugar should cook down rather easily, though...stands to reason.

[Dimocritus]

I never have enough patience, so I like to start as thick as possible.

[LMNO]

I never have enough patience, so I like to start as thick as possible.

Dimo reveals himself to be a size queen, ITT.

[Dimocritus]

I have not yet begun to reveal myself.