KONFESS TO KAOUSUU

[Eater of Clowns]

Forgive me, Suu, for I have not sinned.

I woke to help my father move heavy shit about his yard and do laundry and cook a fast meal to get to work barely on time so I could type type type for eight hours and come home to do the dishes and fold the laundry and water my plants to make sure they're fed because I'm a good housekeeper even if I'm living alone it's shiny in here to prepare for the guests I won't be having but I can't visit them either because my car is all borked and I don't know why but it's a money sink and I can't afford to replace it but I don't want to keep throwing wads of cash into it because it's got 173,246 miles and the jobs are too expensive for that kind of mileage and none of this is usually a problem because I drown it in coffee but today I decided to withdraw to let my brain suffer from shrinking capillaries which were alleviated only by the medicine of an apple that's out of season now so brief a season so lovely a fruit that doesn't taste the same from that bin in the supermarket all shiny with shellac to look as tasty as the colorful wrapper of the leftover Halloween candies I'm keeping in my freezer to dip into for some small bit of pleasure in between bottles of hard cider and the last of the dwindling Oktoberfest supply that acts as a reminder of that brief season to pad our summer levity before the harsh cold claws of winter rip our minds apart with its abusive lack of sunlight further filtered by thick curtains hung to keep the meager heat inside to not run up the bills so steep so as to prevent us from life's other unfortunate necessities like the car so wasted beneath its tiny hull to get us to a job where we type type type for eight hours in between the petty tasks to support a life we can't let age beneath the layer of dust that we know is our own dead skin cruelly settling itself about us to clean lest it remind us that this wasted flesh will eventually cease to renew which is a comforting thought when juxtaposed against all the rest of it.

Forgive me, Suu, for my complaint because I'm one of the lucky ones.
Forgive me, Suu, for my life because I did not wrest it from manipulative others.
Forgive me, Suu, for that single sentence and forgive Squiddy for mentioning run-ons in another thread and bringing it to pass.
Forgive me, Suu, for blaming Squiddy on my misdeeds.
Forgive me, Suu.   

[President Television]

Forgive me, Suu.

I mean, just in general.

[P3nT4gR4m]

Forgive me Suu for I don't believe in the concept of sins. Or confessing to them. Or absolution or any of that bullshit. Only time I'd confess to anything is if I was caught red handed and they offered me a reduced sentence for a plea of guilty. I done plenty of fucked up shit in my time and I don't feel guilty about any of it. I had a fkin great time and if I had the chance I'd do it all over again only this time I'd prolly do even more shit that lesser men would feel the need to confess about.

[Richter]

Suu, forgive the other people for what they've doen to deserve me.

I have imbibbed a great volume of thermonuclear vindaloo with rice and veggies of questionable freshness, and pacified it's fire with several ginger and rum drinks, and a measure of my dubious home brew.  I currently have a capsacin laced biochemical power hammer in my lower GI tract.  I drove helter skelter to work to avoid soiling my pance, and ripped off a crap that was so EPIC I swore a cherubim with a sense of humor and an amp played a power chord to accompany it.

I only regret that I left my half - carved Inquisatorial rosette at home.  I would hold it forth and pronounce vehement Ex Diabolus as I expel the golgothan.

[LMNO]

Forgive me Suu, I missed this thread and did not respond until your moment of grace had passed.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I AM A BAD MONKEY.

[LMNO]

BAD MONKEY NO LEARN?

[The Good Reverend Roger]

BAD MONKEY NO LEARN?

No, I never learn.  It's become a bit of a joke, in some parts.  I do the same stupid shit over and over again, and I am constantly surprised when the results are the same.  I feel like a NASCAR driver that keeps wondering why he only makes left turns, and who has people who like to watch him race, but don't actually want to hang out in the pit with him.

[LMNO]

Actually Rog, that doesn't sound like you.  Honest.

Everything all right in the Wastelands?

[Suu]

I'm not high anymore. 

But I will still answer confessions.

[Suu]

Forgive me, Suu, for I have not sinned.

I woke to help my father move heavy shit about his yard and do laundry and cook a fast meal to get to work barely on time so I could type type type for eight hours and come home to do the dishes and fold the laundry and water my plants to make sure they're fed because I'm a good housekeeper even if I'm living alone it's shiny in here to prepare for the guests I won't be having but I can't visit them either because my car is all borked and I don't know why but it's a money sink and I can't afford to replace it but I don't want to keep throwing wads of cash into it because it's got 173,246 miles and the jobs are too expensive for that kind of mileage and none of this is usually a problem because I drown it in coffee but today I decided to withdraw to let my brain suffer from shrinking capillaries which were alleviated only by the medicine of an apple that's out of season now so brief a season so lovely a fruit that doesn't taste the same from that bin in the supermarket all shiny with shellac to look as tasty as the colorful wrapper of the leftover Halloween candies I'm keeping in my freezer to dip into for some small bit of pleasure in between bottles of hard cider and the last of the dwindling Oktoberfest supply that acts as a reminder of that brief season to pad our summer levity before the harsh cold claws of winter rip our minds apart with its abusive lack of sunlight further filtered by thick curtains hung to keep the meager heat inside to not run up the bills so steep so as to prevent us from life's other unfortunate necessities like the car so wasted beneath its tiny hull to get us to a job where we type type type for eight hours in between the petty tasks to support a life we can't let age beneath the layer of dust that we know is our own dead skin cruelly settling itself about us to clean lest it remind us that this wasted flesh will eventually cease to renew which is a comforting thought when juxtaposed against all the rest of it.

Forgive me, Suu, for my complaint because I'm one of the lucky ones.
Forgive me, Suu, for my life because I did not wrest it from manipulative others.
Forgive me, Suu, for that single sentence and forgive Squiddy for mentioning run-ons in another thread and bringing it to pass.
Forgive me, Suu, for blaming Squiddy on my misdeeds.
Forgive me, Suu.   

Your penance is to move out of New Bedford and start being a little less normal. The Crown Principality of Kaousuu is now accepting applicants for peerage positions. Inquire within.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Actually Rog, that doesn't sound like you.  Honest.

Everything all right in the Wastelands?

Not really, but I've been whimpering enough in this thread already.

[Suu]

Suu, forgive the other people for what they've doen to deserve me.

I have imbibbed a great volume of thermonuclear vindaloo with rice and veggies of questionable freshness, and pacified it's fire with several ginger and rum drinks, and a measure of my dubious home brew.  I currently have a capsacin laced biochemical power hammer in my lower GI tract.  I drove helter skelter to work to avoid soiling my pance, and ripped off a crap that was so EPIC I swore a cherubim with a sense of humor and an amp played a power chord to accompany it.

I only regret that I left my half - carved Inquisatorial rosette at home.  I would hold it forth and pronounce vehement Ex Diabolus as I expel the golgothan.

AGAIN?!

Take a lesson from Roger on this one. For the next hellacious round, begin a chorus of your favorite operatic classic, the more potentially religious the better. Perhaps a Christmas Carol? I recommend Oh Holy Night.

[Suu]

Forgive me Suu, I missed this thread and did not respond until your moment of grace had passed.

Your loss.

Uh...


10 Rosaries.

[Suu]

BAD MONKEY NO LEARN?

No, I never learn.  It's become a bit of a joke, in some parts.  I do the same stupid shit over and over again, and I am constantly surprised when the results are the same.  I feel like a NASCAR driver that keeps wondering why he only makes left turns, and who has people who like to watch him race, but don't actually want to hang out in the pit with him.

SWEEP THE LEG, JOHNNY. NO MERCY.