ITT: Suu declares titles of her peerage.

[LMNO]

I wish to be known as "The Dark God of the Southwest, Enemy of the Realm".

I also wish for Arizona to be renamed "Mordor".  Seriously, the place is just like it.

I'd like to add that if I DON'T get this, I will take steps to ensure that I DO.

Having it rain nonstop between Providence and Burlington, for example.

BRIDGE CLOSED DUE TO RAIN.

You're out of my jurisdiction. Fight over titties with your Southwestern folk. Then we can fight war somewhere in the midwest to piss off Fred.

How I read it, of course.

[Eater of Clowns]

My first act as Baron shall be known as the Massacre of Cape Cod.
I decree whaling legal again, and mandatory for all New Bedford residents.
Fall River shall be burnt to the ground and become a bathroom - the only bathroom in the barony.
Residents of New Jersey, Tennessee, Nebraska, and split-level houses shall be shot on sight.
Official Mascot of the Barony is the noble capybara, world's largest rodent and king of all rats, those requesting meetings with Herr Baron EoC are required to bring two capybaras as signs of goodwill - one for the farm where they will graze in the fields of the former town of Acushnet and one for slaughter to dine upon.
Tuesday night is ladies night, barony-wide.
That guy who takes up two parking spots on my street so I can't parallel behind him shall be requested to be more courteous to his neighbors.
Cacoila, linguica, and chorico are to be renamed Kasoylah, Lingweesah, and Shereese respectively to avoid confusion as to how they are pronounced.
Each of the first three daughters in a family are to be named Kasoylah, Lingweesah, and Shereese, with subsequent generations of female offspring adopting the name next in line from her mother's own.
The Madeira Feast is commanded to no longer smell like burnt cheese and sweat.
The woman across the street is to introduce me to her cat.  It's really cute and I want to pet it.
Anyone bringing a cat within 50 yards of Herr Baron EoC is subject to imprisonment, the cat to be cuddled and then dismembered, and the owner to be informed that seriously, I'm allergic and that wasn't cool.
All subjects are commanded to have a nice day, be kind to your fellow man, and don't fuck up because we're watching you.
That is all.

[LMNO]

Suu, I petition you to claim me Protector of P-Town, to keep EoC's brutal regime from opressing the gentle Bears of Provincetown.

[Eater of Clowns]

I wish to be known as "The Dark God of the Southwest, Enemy of the Realm".

I also wish for Arizona to be renamed "Mordor".  Seriously, the place is just like it.

Also, this:

"There is evil there that does not sleep. The great eye is ever watchful. It is a barren wasteland, riddled with fire, ash, and dust. The very air you breathe is a poisonous fume. Not with ten thousand men could you do this. It is folly."
                    \

[Suu]

Suu, I petition you to claim me Protector of P-Town, to keep EoC's brutal regime from opressing the gentle Bears of Provincetown.

Granted. Only because it really doesn't belong with the rest of the Cape.

[LMNO]

Just like everything else, the tip is more sensitive.

[Suu]

My first act as Baron shall be known as the Massacre of Cape Cod.
I decree whaling legal again, and mandatory for all New Bedford residents.
Fall River shall be burnt to the ground and become a bathroom - the only bathroom in the barony.
Residents of New Jersey, Tennessee, Nebraska, and split-level houses shall be shot on sight.
Official Mascot of the Barony is the noble capybara, world's largest rodent and king of all rats, those requesting meetings with Herr Baron EoC are required to bring two capybaras as signs of goodwill - one for the farm where they will graze in the fields of the former town of Acushnet and one for slaughter to dine upon.
Tuesday night is ladies night, barony-wide.
That guy who takes up two parking spots on my street so I can't parallel behind him shall be requested to be more courteous to his neighbors.
Cacoila, linguica, and chorico are to be renamed Kasoylah, Lingweesah, and Shereese respectively to avoid confusion as to how they are pronounced.
Each of the first three daughters in a family are to be named Kasoylah, Lingweesah, and Shereese, with subsequent generations of female offspring adopting the name next in line from her mother's own.
The Madeira Feast is commanded to no longer smell like burnt cheese and sweat.
The woman across the street is to introduce me to her cat.  It's really cute and I want to pet it.
Anyone bringing a cat within 50 yards of Herr Baron EoC is subject to imprisonment, the cat to be cuddled and then dismembered, and the owner to be informed that seriously, I'm allergic and that wasn't cool.
All subjects are commanded to have a nice day, be kind to your fellow man, and don't fuck up because we're watching you.
That is all.

There will be no dismembering of cats!

The taking of Zyrtec is mandatory for all landed gentry.

[Suu]

HEAR YE SPAGS

I'm headed to the North this evening. Richter is in charge.

No wait, he'll be gone too.

Fuck.

Um...


EoC is in charge.

God speed you glorious faggots!

[Eater of Clowns]

HEAR YE SPAGS

I'm headed to the North this evening. Richter is in charge.

No wait, he'll be gone too.

Fuck.

Um...


EoC is in charge.

God speed you glorious faggots!

  I will treat it with the same dilligent care and unpaid forced labor of my own barony.

[Suu]

Bump .

Rewriting/adding new titles.

[Suu]

I, the Sovereign Princess Kaousuu of the Bridges, Bays and Block-like Islands, hearby declare the following peerages in my court:

Duke Richter of the Sphincter; protector of Providence. Ale conner to the Princess, Rector of the First Church of Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion, SPoK. Steward the lands of the Northwest. Leader of the Principality's forces.

Marchioness Leln of Worcester; overseer of the Greater Blackstone Valley.

Baron Cuddlefish of Coventry; Count of the Warwicks. Steward to South County.

Baron Eater of Clowns of Bedford; Count of Chorico, Linguica, and Rats. Protector of East Bay, South Shore, Cape Cod, and the Islands. Earl of Illegal Parking.

Sir LMNO of Outside Boston;  Baron Beantown and chief ambassador to Long Island. Protector of Provincetown.

Lord Cainad of the Stony Brook; Junior Ambassador to Long Island.

Lord Mangrove of Hartford; protector of the Border.

Darth Cupcake of the Sith; Lady of Rock City.

Lady Eve of the Shoreline;  keeper of the New Haven Territories, ambassador to Boston.

Magister Cramulus of the Hudson; Chief Advisor, keeper of the WOMP, and Protector of the Metropolis.

Sir What's His Name? of the Downeasters; Magister of the Punnery, Steward to the Lands of the Northeast.

Dame TrippinPrincezz of the Hills; Retainer of the Tax-Free Liquor Stores.

Lady Luna of the Castle; Watcher of the Cranston Street Keep, Steward of West End and So-Pro.

Dowager Prince Herbert of the Monastery; Feeder of Rin and Mishu, enforcer of Duke Richter's bad ideas.

Lord Rip City Hustle; the Baron formerly known as East Coast Hustle, the one that got away.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

EOC should also be the Earl of Illegal Parking.

[Richter]

Dimo deserves honorary satrapy of all ceilings too.

[Suu]

EOC should also be the Earl of Illegal Parking.

Done.

Dimo deserves honorary satrapy of all ceilings too.

I'm still thinking on this one...

[Suu]

Oh shit son...if DF and I ever get serious, that puts the consort in a position surrounding Boston and full extension to the Canadian border through New Hampshire.

EXCELLENT...