Renamed: GOD. DAMN. IT.

[Freeky]

I am warily happy about this.

[Doktor Howl]

I am warily happy about this.

Thought you might be.  I need you to shave a 1.5" square patch on either side of the dog, though.

[Freeky]

I am warily happy about this.

Thought you might be.  I need you to shave a 1.5" square patch on either side of the dog, though.

I'm pretty sure this is going to end up being animal abuse.

[Doktor Howl]

I am warily happy about this.

Thought you might be.  I need you to shave a 1.5" square patch on either side of the dog, though.

I'm pretty sure this is going to end up being animal abuse.

Probably.  But dustmop has to learn.

[Freeky]

I am warily happy about this.

Thought you might be.  I need you to shave a 1.5" square patch on either side of the dog, though.

I'm pretty sure this is going to end up being animal abuse.

Probably.  But dustmop has to learn.

... I'm not going to do anything inhumane to Pickles. I'll crate train him instead.

[Doktor Howl]

I am warily happy about this.

Thought you might be.  I need you to shave a 1.5" square patch on either side of the dog, though.

I'm pretty sure this is going to end up being animal abuse.

Probably.  But dustmop has to learn.

... I'm not going to do anything inhumane to Pickles. I'll crate train him instead.

It's not inhumane.  Dustmop isn't a human, after all.  Look, it's really simple.  You shave those two spots for the conductive tape, I'll hook the dog up, and then you wait in the front room while I let the little freak out.  You should play loud music while I'm out back, though.  It will relax you.  Really fucking loud.  This is crucial to the success of the treatment.

[Freeky]

I am warily happy about this.

Thought you might be.  I need you to shave a 1.5" square patch on either side of the dog, though.

I'm pretty sure this is going to end up being animal abuse.

Probably.  But dustmop has to learn.

... I'm not going to do anything inhumane to Pickles. I'll crate train him instead.

It's not inhumane.  Dustmop isn't a human, after all.  Look, it's really simple.  You shave those two spots for the conductive tape, I'll hook the dog up, and then you wait in the front room while I let the little freak out.  You should play loud music while I'm out back, though.  It will relax you.  Really fucking loud.  This is crucial to the success of the treatment.

JUST CUZ IM AN IDIOT DOESNT MEAN IM STUPID!!!

[Doktor Howl]

I am warily happy about this.

Thought you might be.  I need you to shave a 1.5" square patch on either side of the dog, though.

I'm pretty sure this is going to end up being animal abuse.

Probably.  But dustmop has to learn.

... I'm not going to do anything inhumane to Pickles. I'll crate train him instead.

It's not inhumane.  Dustmop isn't a human, after all.  Look, it's really simple.  You shave those two spots for the conductive tape, I'll hook the dog up, and then you wait in the front room while I let the little freak out.  You should play loud music while I'm out back, though.  It will relax you.  Really fucking loud.  This is crucial to the success of the treatment.

JUST CUZ IM AN IDIOT DOESNT MEAN IM STUPID!!!

You're neither, Freeky.  Trust the Doktor on this one, though.  We'll cure that little hamster looking thing, one way or the other.

[Freeky]

Bah. Fine. I would just like to say that I am extremely uncomfortable with this.

[Doktor Howl]

Bah. Fine. I would just like to say that I am extremely uncomfortable with this.

Everything will be fine.  Dustmop won't give you any more trouble.

[Freeky]

Bah. Fine. I would just like to say that I am extremely uncomfortable with this.

Everything will be fine.  Dustmop won't give you any more trouble.

Here's hoping.

[Triple Zero]

Just for being the voice between reason and science .. While on the one hand Dok's idea is sound (if it is what I think it is), minor electric shocks would condition the critter within no time. However, dogs are pack animals, and are used to learning from the alpha dogs, and not from uncaring machines.

Naturally, it being Freeky's doggie, she will be its alpha dog. For--among other things--the simple reason it's usually whoever feeds it.

You might wanna ask Syn, he has a dog and she is trained perfectly. Better than his kids, anyway :-P

OTOH, Dok also used to have a dog so he might know.

One thing about running away is something I think Syn told me, when they are young they will jump all over the place when you let them out and they need to learn they need to pay attention to where their master is. So what you do is when in the park or something, the doggie is being hyperactive and playing and when it's not paying attention, you hide behind a tree or streetpost or whatever, staying out of sight but keeping an eye on the doggie until it realized its master is GONE. And then you let it panic for a little while. And then you go back and the doggie will be MEGA HAPPY and SCRAED SHITLESS and never loose sight of you again.

Is the theory.

But I never had a dog.

Just a rabbit. Which had SCARED SHITLESS as its default factory setting or something.

[Doktor Howl]

Just for being the voice between reason and science .. While on the one hand Dok's idea is sound (if it is what I think it is), minor electric shocks would condition the critter within no time. However, dogs are pack animals, and are used to learning from the alpha dogs, and not from uncaring machines.

There will be no minor electric shocks involved.

[Jasper]

Bah. Fine. I would just like to say that I am extremely uncomfortable with this.

Everything will be fine.  Dustmop won't give you any more trouble.

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[Freeky]

Just for being the voice between reason and science .. While on the one hand Dok's idea is sound (if it is what I think it is), minor electric shocks would condition the critter within no time. However, dogs are pack animals, and are used to learning from the alpha dogs, and not from uncaring machines.

There will be no minor electric shocks involved.

This is what he meant.