UNLIMITED SARAH PALIN APPRECIATION THREAD!

[Jenne]

What happened on 9/12 is why Oprah flew my ass (and my husband's) to Chicago and put us up at the Omni.

That's a great story, in and of itself.

Do tell!

K, it's your funeral.  I think I've told this before, really.

About 3 days after 9/11, people in the media were SCERAAAAMBLING to find Afghans in the US.  To see what their reaction was.  So, LA Times found my MA thesis and contacted my department to see if I was willing to talk.  I said I was, and the LAX's reporter interviewed me.  She found out my HUSBAND was the REAL Afghan, and came from LA to San Diego and interviewed him.  Hugeass color picture of him treating a patient and all.  They also found a few other Afghans (known to us through their businesses, etc.) in the community down here, did bios on them in the story, their reactions, etc.

Fast-forward like 2 weeks later, and motherfucking OPRAH calls our asses (ok, one of her little producer-chicks who run everything, but still) to come on a show.  WTF?!  Yeah. So I call my husband to see if he's willing, he is, and he interviews over the phone.  They eat up his immigrant story with a spoon.  I send them all sorts of photos (like 50) overnight FedEx in little baggies, labeled, and they make flight arrangements for us.  We get babysitting hella fast for our 1 year old and 4 year old, and then, in October of 01, manage to fly out of LAX to Chicago.

I say Manage because fuckshitdamn it was HORRIBLY tough to get the fuck out of an airport in those days.

Anyway, after a 3 hour delay because of some dumbfuck leaving a bag unattended that needed to be exploded (ever heard/seen that?  it's a trip), we got to Chicago, LATE, and got in the Omni hotel via limo.  Whereupon they gave us a CHERRY suite and $250 in hotel vouchers for whatever the fuck.  We were scheduled to fly back outta Chicago the next evening, so that $250 basically got spent on a hugeass expensive bottle of wine at dinner after the show.

The next morning, in a limo we were taken to the studio, in the middle of a dirty, sticky alleyway, and shown in the entrance they take the "talent" (woowoo!), off to the Green Room to get my husband "make-up'd"...there we meet a 9/11 widow of the Towers, and she was "against invading Afghanistan."

That's why she was on the show.  And then my husband set into her, hardcore.  He told her that if the US didn't carpet bomb, it would be smart to get the US to take out the element that he thought was keeping Afhganistan back and holding it from being more of a democratic government (yeah, he is a bit of a romantic about his people, what of it?).  He said a strategic stricke against the Talibs would free the natives and make it easier for them to get on with their lives, with aid from the West, of course.

Effectively, in the space of about 20 minutes, we changed Oprah's whole show.  See, in LIVE teevee (we were live that morning, which is why he never ended up on the show, along with his opinion in the Green Room), everything is just as scripted as it is in taped teevee.  They had selected these folks from the "real world" to interview and give "balanced" opinions on "to war or not to war."  Jesse Jackson was on that morning, we were warned, and he would take up more than his fair share of airtime--he was "in negotiations" with the Talibs, and was trying to keep us from going to war.  When 9/11 Widow came on, she totally 180'd her stance that was pre-recorded in a montage and said, LIVE, to a double-taking Oprah:  "Well, I'm against war if they CARPET BOMB.  BUT I BELIEVE THE PEOPLE OF AFGHANISTAN SHOULD BE FREED OF TALIBAN TYRANNY." 

Well, sheeit.  My husband and I didn't expect she'd be so easily led.  Har, yolk's on us.  So the OTHER Afghan family, who stood up and said, "Please, our country's seen too much war, keep America's bombs out of Afghanistan" got on live TV.  And my husband was on instead "after the show"...Oprah kept saying during the commercial breaks "BALANCE, PEOPLE, BALANCE!!!"  Which meant, if they had a pro-war'er, they had then have on an anti-war'er.  9/11 Widow'd upset that balance.  Due to our so-called PERSUASIVE arguments in the Green Room.

LOL

But hey, it was fun, it was a blast, and makes for a great story.  We got Oprah mugs, a stay at the Omni, a kickass dinner and tour of Chicago on Oprah's dime for our troubles.  Not to mention the experience itself.

So that was one of my many brushes with near-fame.

[Lord Quantum]

Wow. Cool. So what did you do your MA thesis on?

[Jenne]

A small linguistic doohickey I noticed when the Afghan Doctors Association in So Cal got together and spoke Dari.  *shrug*

Not as exciting as the Oprah story.

[Lord Quantum]

Not really. So you're a linguistics person, I assume? And how's that Ph.D. going?

[AFK]

A small linguistic doohickey I noticed when the Afghan Doctors Association in So Cal got together and spoke Dari.  *shrug*

Not as exciting as the Oprah story.

Hey, I don't suppose you have any experience working with Somali immigrants do you?  If you have, and have any lessons learned or tips you'd like to share, send them my way. 

[Jenne]

Not really. So you're a linguistics person, I assume? And how's that Ph.D. going?

Har, yeah, not going to do that one, lmao.  Bread and butter is TESL.  Which came with my MA in applied ling, so there you go.

[Jenne]

A small linguistic doohickey I noticed when the Afghan Doctors Association in So Cal got together and spoke Dari.  *shrug*

Not as exciting as the Oprah story.

Hey, I don't suppose you have any experience working with Somali immigrants do you?  If you have, and have any lessons learned or tips you'd like to share, send them my way. 

Yeah, that would be my husband, not me.  He has a largish Somali population he sees.  Watch out for the multiple wives phenomenon.

[Mangrove]

Wanna keep Caribou Barbie off your tv screen?

http://act.credoaction.com/campaign/palin_discovery/?r_by=-2864407-L9SEQRx&rc=paste1

Environmentalists who object to the idea of her appearing on the typically 'green' Discovery channel have started a 'pention'.

[Requia ☣]

Why would you want to *stop* her from being on the discovery channel?  Sarah Palin discussing wildlife sounds like a truly great comedy show.

[Mangrove]

Why would you want to *stop* her from being on the discovery channel?  Sarah Palin discussing wildlife sounds like a truly great comedy show.

good point  

More seriously though. I am sick of: a) Her fucking face
                                                 b) Her voice
                                                 c) Her beliefs
                                                 d) Her stupidity
                                                 e) Her family
                                               
It's 'the joke that isn't funny any more'. The joke is over and not only is she not aware of that fact, she's persisted in being yet another vacuous, talentless celeb-wannabe who is earning considerable coin out of pretty much nothing.

So if I can contribute, even in only a little tiny way to bust the bubble and get her 'Sarah Palin's Alaska' show canceled, then I'm all for it.

[Freeky]

Wanna keep Caribou Barbie off your tv screen?

http://act.credoaction.com/campaign/palin_discovery/?r_by=-2864407-L9SEQRx&rc=paste1

Environmentalists who object to the idea of her appearing on the typically 'green' Discovery channel have started a 'pention'.

I just signed it twice. STAY OFFA MAH TEEVEE YOU SCARY LADY!

[Mangrove]

Wanna keep Caribou Barbie off your tv screen?

http://act.credoaction.com/campaign/palin_discovery/?r_by=-2864407-L9SEQRx&rc=paste1

Environmentalists who object to the idea of her appearing on the typically 'green' Discovery channel have started a 'pention'.

I just signed it twice. STAY OFFA MAH TEEVEE YOU SCARY LADY!

Cool. Support our ribbons!!! 

[AFK]

Given the big oil slick in the Gulf heading towards Louisiana, I think I'm going to laugh myself silly the next time I hear her say "Drill Baby Drill"

[Mangrove]

Given the big oil slick in the Gulf heading towards Louisiana, I think I'm going to laugh myself silly the next time I hear her say "Drill Baby Drill"

Sign the pention! Do it for the polar bears!

[Jasper]

Signed it.