BP discovers new species of marine mammal.

[Kai]

The Gulf Coast Walrus, Odobenus mexicanus.

What, it doesn't exist, you say? And neither do the other experts in BP's Gulf of Mexico Response Plan?

http://www.csmonitor.com/From-the-news-wires/2010/0609/BP-s-gulf-oil-spill-response-plan-lists-the-walrus-as-a-local-species.-Louisiana-Gov.-Bobby-Jindal-is-furious?

Professor Peter Lutz is listed in BP's 2009 response plan for a Gulf of Mexico oil spill as a national wildlife expert. He died in 2005.


Under the heading "sensitive biological resources," the plan lists marine mammals including walruses, sea otters, sea lions and seals. None lives anywhere near the Gulf.

The names and phone numbers of several Texas A&M University marine life specialists are wrong. So are the numbers for marine mammal stranding network offices in Louisiana and Florida, which are no longer in service.

Oh well. Nothing we can do about that now, might as well chalk it up to an honest mistake.

[Cramulus]

I heard from Cainad that in their response plan they list a manufacturer that can provide cleanup equipment... and that the website they link to is actually an unrelated japanese infomercial.

[Bebek Sincap Ratatosk]

Ow. My brain hurts now...

Fuck You, Kai!

[Kai]

I heard from Cainad that in their response plan they list a manufacturer that can provide cleanup equipment... and that the website they link to is actually an unrelated japanese infomercial.

Come on, websites change all the time! And a slight difference in URL causes a big difference in the site it goes to, you know?

*hand waving and men behind curtains*

[PopeTom]

I heard from Cainad that in their response plan they list a manufacturer that can provide cleanup equipment... and that the website they link to is actually an unrelated japanese infomercial.

                       Did someone say cleanup equipment?
                                             //

[P3nT4gR4m]

What's that you say, simple, straightforward problem turning into an epic clusterfuck? Reports sounding exponentially more retarded by the millisecond? Surely not, that would mean it's business as usual

[Kai]

What's that you say, simple, straightforward problem turning into an epic clusterfuck? Reports sounding exponentially more retarded by the millisecond? Surely not, that would mean it's business as usual

Clusterfuck? No, this is just a mismanagement of implementation temporal missed opportunity. Retarded? No, that's a misfiling of middle management psychological documentation.

But yes, it is business as usual.

[Suu]

This enrages me.

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

Maddow has been going on about this for a while.
It's quite interesting to see a BP spokesperson's reaction when confronted with this "wtf is this?" question. He wasn't stunned, he just kinda flim flammed his way around it, making himself and the company look like ASSES

[Requia ☣]

What really really gets me about this is; BP wrote this report for the regulators.  Didn't they fucking read it?  I expect BP to do as little as possible if they aren't forced to, that's what we have the regulators for.

Not only that, but this can't be isolated, they must have *known* the regulators would let it slide, or they wouldn't have done such a half assed job, so every other oil spill response plan in the country is probably just as screwed up.

[BabylonHoruv]

A friend of mine is involved with the cleanup efforts.  He insists that of all the companies involved BP is being the most responsible, as they are actually paying for cleanup, while the others (Halliburton etc) are not doing so.  He feels the media portrayal is badly lopsided. 

[Sir Squid Diddimus]

The spokesperson's reply to "why wasn't more research and development put into clean-up" was basically something along the lines of- there wasn't enough oil spilled to warrant investing all the money into it..
Here--
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26315908/

Oh, he's a chief operating officer this guy is

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

So I'm getting the impression that BP frequently utilizes the "rent a white guy" strategy. http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/07/rent-a-white-guy/8119

[Iason Ouabache]

What really really gets me about this is; BP wrote this report for the regulators.  Didn't they fucking read it?  I expect BP to do as little as possible if they aren't forced to, that's what we have the regulators for.

Not only that, but this can't be isolated, they must have *known* the regulators would let it slide, or they wouldn't have done such a half assed job, so every other oil spill response plan in the country is probably just as screwed up.

The problem is that the regulators used to be oil industry executives and the oil industry executives used to be regulators. They went golfing with each other. They would go on vacation together. They went to football games together. And many times they were literally in bed with each other. There was so much inbreeding between the two groups that we ended up with this ultra-retarded situation.

[Requia ☣]

The spokesperson's reply to "why wasn't more research and development put into clean-up" was basically something along the lines of- there wasn't enough oil spilled to warrant investing all the money into it..
Here--
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26315908/

Oh, he's a chief operating officer this guy is

That video kinda bugs me, of course none of these things have been tried at this depth, we haven't had anything like this since 1980, techniques have advanced a bit since then.

Was BP supposed to create a leak on purpose just so they can try out capping strategies?