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Read this Shit

Started by Vene, June 17, 2010, 04:21:36 AM

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Vene

Read it! Do it!  :argh!:

Georgia candidate for governor says sex with mules, watermelon behind him

Quote"When you grow up on a farm in Georgia, your first girlfriend is a mule."

...

"The kicker is, as soon as I was done she pissed all over me. It was embarrassing. I never told anyone that before."

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Vene on June 17, 2010, 04:21:36 AM
Read it! Do it!  :argh!:

Georgia candidate for governor says sex with mules, watermelon behind him

Quote"When you grow up on a farm in Georgia, your first girlfriend is a mule."

...

"The kicker is, as soon as I was done she pissed all over me. It was embarrassing. I never told anyone that before."
:eek:



HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Wow. Just wow.
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TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Cramulus

In the choppy seas of modern living, this is what we call a crest.

It's a situation so absurd it can't help but acknowledge its own absurdity. It's self aware. And in doing so it tries to pass off the absurdity as everyday-normal. Maybe it is everyday-normal? Either way, the bar has been raised.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Cramulus on June 17, 2010, 02:43:53 PM
In the choppy seas of modern living, this is what we call a crest.

It's a situation so absurd it can't help but acknowledge its own absurdity. It's self aware. And in doing so it tries to pass off the absurdity as everyday-normal. Maybe it is everyday-normal? Either way, the bar has been raised.

He did seem to assert that his zoophilia was normal and no big deal. Like, everyone does it in Georgia! You'd think that if sheep/goat/horse/cow/mule/whatever-fucking were exceptable, so would homosexuality, since, you know, God kinda hates that too. I wonder if the WBC knows about him?

I also like how his wife divorced him because of "too much drama"
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Dysfunctional Cunt

Well just for the record, in response to this.....

QuoteAC: "Are you suggesting that everybody who grows up on a farm in Georgia has a mule as a girlfriend?"

NH: It has historically been the case. You people are so far removed from the reality... Welcome to domestic life on the farm..."

Colmes said he thought there were a lot of people in the audience who grew up on farms, are living on farms now, raising kids on farms and "and I don't think they are dating Elsie right now. You know what I'm saying?"

Horsley said, "You experiment with anything that moves when you are growing up sexually. You're naive. You know better than that... If it's warm and it's damp and it vibrates you might in fact have sex with it."


I can say with full confidence that I have never met anyone who had sex with a farm animal or any animal for that matter, well except human ones.  Well except that chick in Mexico with the donkey, but I didn't really meet her as much as kind of wave as she walked away. 

I grew up on a farm so far in the valley I was 7 before we had electricity and indoor plumbing.  Nobody was fucking the livestock or the fruits or vegetables.

This guy is nuts.  Did anyone read this article?

http://www.examiner.com/x-1765-Underground-Examiner~y2009m4d30-Candidate-for-governor-Neal-Horsley-says-terrorism-has-basis-in-scripture

Our government, worried about a few people coming across the border from Mexico and other bullshit, yet this fucker is walking free AND running for political office.  The scariest part is going to be if he wins.


Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Khara on June 17, 2010, 03:16:11 PM
Well just for the record, in response to this.....

QuoteAC: "Are you suggesting that everybody who grows up on a farm in Georgia has a mule as a girlfriend?"

NH: It has historically been the case. You people are so far removed from the reality... Welcome to domestic life on the farm..."

Colmes said he thought there were a lot of people in the audience who grew up on farms, are living on farms now, raising kids on farms and "and I don't think they are dating Elsie right now. You know what I'm saying?"

Horsley said, "You experiment with anything that moves when you are growing up sexually. You're naive. You know better than that... If it's warm and it's damp and it vibrates you might in fact have sex with it."


I can say with full confidence that I have never met anyone who had sex with a farm animal or any animal for that matter, well except human ones.  Well except that chick in Mexico with the donkey, but I didn't really meet her as much as kind of wave as she walked away. 

I grew up on a farm so far in the valley I was 7 before we had electricity and indoor plumbing.  Nobody was fucking the livestock or the fruits or vegetables.

This guy is nuts.  Did anyone read this article?

http://www.examiner.com/x-1765-Underground-Examiner~y2009m4d30-Candidate-for-governor-Neal-Horsley-says-terrorism-has-basis-in-scripture

Our government, worried about a few people coming across the border from Mexico and other bullshit, yet this fucker is walking free AND running for political office.  The scariest part is going to be if he wins.



The Creator's Rights Party, fighting against abortion, and for your right to secede, blow shit up, kill your son, and fuck your mule.


I doubt he'll win. I think the mule fucking is sufficient to exclude him. Then again, if Georgia elects this guy, I will happily endorse their secession.
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Rumckle

Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 17, 2010, 02:53:34 PM
He did seem to assert that his zoophilia was normal and no big deal. Like, everyone does it in Georgia! You'd think that if sheep/goat/horse/cow/mule/whatever-fucking were exceptable, so would homosexuality, since, you know, God kinda hates that too. I wonder if the WBC knows about him?

I also like how his wife divorced him because of "too much drama"

Plus, from the article:

QuoteNot only that, but Horsley has had sex with men. He was in the Air Force, it was a cold night, yadda, yadda, yadda, he had sex with him, ahem, the way he did the mule. "It was gross," he says.
It's not trolling, it's just satire.

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

DISCLAIMER: Ratatosk did not grow up on a farm

True Story: Ratatosk walked into the barn on his grandma's property when he was 10 and saw his uncle having fun with a goat.

Scary Bit: He offered me a turn

Also Scary Bit: He justified it by saying "Well, everyone I know does it"

:horrormirth:
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Rumckle on June 17, 2010, 03:27:35 PM
Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 17, 2010, 02:53:34 PM
He did seem to assert that his zoophilia was normal and no big deal. Like, everyone does it in Georgia! You'd think that if sheep/goat/horse/cow/mule/whatever-fucking were exceptable, so would homosexuality, since, you know, God kinda hates that too. I wonder if the WBC knows about him?

I also like how his wife divorced him because of "too much drama"

Plus, from the article:

QuoteNot only that, but Horsley has had sex with men. He was in the Air Force, it was a cold night, yadda, yadda, yadda, he had sex with him, ahem, the way he did the mule. "It was gross," he says.

Forgot that bit, lol
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TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Ratatosk on June 17, 2010, 03:30:35 PM
DISCLAIMER: Ratatosk did not grow up on a farm

True Story: Ratatosk walked into the barn on his grandma's property when he was 10 and saw his uncle having fun with a goat.

Scary Bit: He offered me a turn

Also Scary Bit: He justified it by saying "Well, everyone I know does it"

:horrormirth:

Breakfast must have been awkward the next day.
Strange and Terrible Organ Laminator of Yesterday's Heavy Scene
Sentence or sentence fragment pending

Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Bebek Sincap Ratatosk

Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 17, 2010, 03:36:25 PM
Quote from: Ratatosk on June 17, 2010, 03:30:35 PM
DISCLAIMER: Ratatosk did not grow up on a farm

True Story: Ratatosk walked into the barn on his grandma's property when he was 10 and saw his uncle having fun with a goat.

Scary Bit: He offered me a turn

Also Scary Bit: He justified it by saying "Well, everyone I know does it"

:horrormirth:

Breakfast must have been awkward the next day.

Heh, we were just visiting for the afternoon. After that I came to understand why we didn't go visit that side of the family very often....
- I don't see race. I just see cars going around in a circle.

"Back in my day, crazy meant something. Now everyone is crazy" - Charlie Manson

Adios

I spent a lot of time as a kid on a farm in Georgia and never knew anybody who fucked animals except 1 guy in Florida. The cow kicked him in the nads so that one didn't work out well either.

Nephew Twiddleton

Quote from: Charley Brown on June 17, 2010, 06:15:20 PM
I spent a lot of time as a kid on a farm in Georgia and never knew anybody who fucked animals except 1 guy in Florida. The cow kicked him in the nads so that one didn't work out well either.

Ack. That sounds like an understatement.

So either this dude knows about some secret club of zoophiles or he's grossly overestimating people who share his predilections.
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Hoser McRhizzy

Quote from: Cramulus on June 17, 2010, 02:43:53 PM
In the choppy seas of modern living, this is what we call a crest.

It's a situation so absurd it can't help but acknowledge its own absurdity. It's self aware. And in doing so it tries to pass off the absurdity as everyday-normal. Maybe it is everyday-normal? Either way, the bar has been raised.

Quote from: Nephew Twiddleton on June 17, 2010, 03:24:22 PM
The Creator's Rights Party, fighting against abortion, and for your right to secede, blow shit up, kill your son, and fuck your mule.


I doubt he'll win. I think the mule fucking is sufficient to exclude him. Then again, if Georgia elects this guy, I will happily endorse their secession.

Helps that his name is Horsley.  :lol:

Yup, I am 12.  But think of the headlines! "Candidate Horsley 'loved' by Mule"...
It feels unreal because it's trickling up.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

I'm from Oregon, where "everyone knows" bestiality is commonplace (it's part of our mythology, basically), and I think I've only met a couple of people who ever messed around with animals... or at least, who would admit to it.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."