Deacon Richter's Epistle to the Jaded

[Richter]

Get Serious Asswipes!

Are you looking for a good time?  A one way trip to insanity, weekend excursion to hit bottom, workshop on horror, a vacation care package GUARANTEED to damage you with native ceremonies and hook ups (literally)?

This is the part where the Deacon tells you to go fuck yourself.  The Insanity is not for the passer by or the consumer.  Insanity is also one letter away from Inanity for a reason.  There are no pedestrian trips into the dark side of the force.  You can't just hit into it, weekend warrior style, and flounce back into the office all a - glow Monday morning like you're just done a fucking cancer walk.

This isn't the sort of cesspool you can skim a discerning finger over, cheekily sample the stink, and connoisseur about the aspects of it.  Cock out, Pants OFF, strut up to the edge and teabag the shit.  If you still have something RESSEMBLING genitals when you pull out, you drop your whole ass IN.

No one is going to bring you the horror.  You cannot summon the finest and most fabulous of the court faggots, hire a coterie of shit magnets, bestow upon them booze and drugs and expect it to happen.  This is a participatory sport.  Like the Australian told me, "Suppose you're standing there, and in front of you you're looking at this set of buttocks.  Huge, hairy, and reeking.  Would you GO IN?  Not to get your rocks off.  To see just HOW bad God's own beastly arsehole could REALLY be."  Get off of the lounge chair worldly fashionable ennui attitude and find something worth screaming about.  I'm off to stab something.

[Adios]

The answer is to make your own good times.

[Doktor Howl]

BOO YAH!

[Cainad (dec.)]

[Golden Applesauce]

But I don't want to go off the deep end.

[Hoser McRhizzy]

Get off of the lounge chair worldly fashionable ennui attitude and find something worth screaming about. 

[Cramulus]

being totally batshit is the greatest and most underappreciated american right

[Richter]

Amen, Cram.  Yo ho ho and a bottle of Tums.

The answer is to make your own good times.

That's the bush I was going for.  I think I jsut slash and burned everythign around it.

[Freeky]

The answer is to make your own good times.

That's the bush I was going for.  I think I jsut slash and burned everythign around it.

Is there any other way to do anything?

[Richter]

But I don't want to go off the deep end.

Then get off the roof.

The answer is to make your own good times.

That's the bush I was going for.  I think I jsut slash and burned everythign around it.

Is there any other way to do anything?

I was once asked to rely only on slashing.  Something about not violating federal law or setting the neighbor's house on fire. 

[Freeky]

But I don't want to go off the deep end.

Then get off the roof.

The answer is to make your own good times.

That's the bush I was going for.  I think I jsut slash and burned everythign around it.

Is there any other way to do anything?

I was once asked to rely only on slashing.  Something about not violating federal law or setting the neighbor's house on fire. 

Bah. Whoever that was obviously doesn't know how to get things done in a properly thorough manor.

[Richter]

It forced me to use my axe instead.  Which was gratifying when I blew a fence into kindling.

[Doktor Howl]

Bah. Whoever that was obviously doesn't know how to get things done in a properly thorough manor.

Granite, but for all intensive porpoises, that's what you get with those that are to the manner born.

[Freeky]

Bah. Whoever that was obviously doesn't know how to get things done in a properly thorough manor.

Granite, but for all intensive porpoises, that's what you get with those that are to the manner born.

... I can't tell if you saw what I did there or just think I made a typo.

Either way,

[Doktor Howl]

Bah. Whoever that was obviously doesn't know how to get things done in a properly thorough manor.

Granite, but for all intensive porpoises, that's what you get with those that are to the manner born.

... I can't tell if you saw what I did there or just think I made a typo.

Either way,

I was pretty sure it was what you just did there.