Notes for people wishing to visit Tucson™.

[Jasper]

Ohh.  I've been through the grapevine.

I didn't spend long.

[tyrannosaurus vex]

Being a former resident of the Plant of Tucson myself, I feel it is my responsibility to inform you all of one useful tip that the good Doktor neglected to include:

There is no need to waste money on expensive sunblock during the summer. Simply covering yourself with bacon grease and lying on a sidewalk will protect you from the sun.

[Nast]

Being a former resident of the Plant of Tucson myself, I feel it is my responsibility to inform you all of one useful tip that the good Doktor neglected to include:

There is no need to waste money on expensive sunblock during the summer. Simply covering yourself with bacon grease and lying on a sidewalk will protect you from the sun.

And then there's the benefit that  your leathery old hide can be used to reupholster sofas!